Why Do I Run From Relationships?

0:00This is an I Heart podcast guaranteed human. What up this J Valentine co-host of the R&B money podcast alongside my brother R&B legend tank together We've built a space for artists executives and fans of R&B music to reminisce and tell the real stories behind the music. I have no money. I was hood famous. They think you're gonna get everybody out. We lived in a project and real love came out. They hear them music and we had nothing from Smokey Robinson to Mary J. Blige. V2K to Jill Scott. If you're a super dedicated R&B fan, this is where you belong. Listen to R&B money from the Black Effect podcast network on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Hey, it's Alec Baldwin. This season on my podcast, here's the thing I talk to actor Stephen Root. I'm a people watcher. You see that guy going down the drain though? Yeah, I can use that. And open igloo co-founder, Aliah Mohammed. I love staying on top of what is going on in our city. What is on renter's minds and taking all of that knowledge to build a platform.

1:00That hopefully is going to make New York City better in the long run. Listen to here's the thing on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. The World Cup is over, but if you caught the soccer bug and aren't sure what to do now, check out our podcast Big Kick Energy. I'm Cameron Dicker, the kicker from the Los Angeles Chargers, and I'm here with Timmy Tillman, current LFC star player. So we know a little something about kicking balls. Each week will tackle things like, who's winning the Premier League this year? What do you think is harder? Scoring a penalty kick or scoring a field goal? Join us each week for a quick chat with your soccer-loving bros about the best sport in the world. Soccer, just don't tell my coaches I said that. Listen to Big Kick Energy on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to podcasts. 30 years ago, an island off Manhattan almost brought down New York City. Who will you trust? Your friends and neighbors? Who will you trust the people five miles overseas? This is a story about neighbors turning on each other. And what happens when a forgotten place decides it's had enough.

2:03But we're not stopping, are we? Listen to revisionist history, the Staten Island problem on the I Heart Radio app Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, hey, I do part two at your club at the Mentor Kelly Ben Simone. And I'm here with one of my favorite mentors from the Golden Bachelor at its Joan of Estos. Hi, it's been too long. They were going to chat a little bit about the sit-down combo that Jaina had this week with Shayna Mochler and it was a good one. If you hasn't listened to that episode yet, pause right now, go listen to that episode and then come back right here. Well, let's get started.

3:05I'm so excited to see you and I'm going to see you in New York City on October. I think it's the six for the page six reality awards. Oh, great. I'm presenting the war to you guys. No. Through the real to the golden life. I love that. I did. Yeah, so we have to get together and you have to tell me what you're wearing because I have no idea what to wear to this thing. Oh my god, we will definitely have a debrief and you have to come over. We have drinks and do all sorts of fun. I would love to. I'm coming the day before. Oh my god. Okay, great. Okay. It's a date. It's a date. Okay, but let's get let's start talking. So the trailer just came out today. Did you see it yet? I did. I'm obsessed. I've watched it like four times and I'm worried that some of the girls may have been mean to you. I mean, I just think it's so funny. I'm like, excuse me. I would have to come and beat them up. I'm kind of very polite, you know, but they don't they don't like that. You are like the nicest. Okay, so you're the nicest person, but I also want to say you're like the nicest pretty person because a lot of times really

4:08beautiful women aren't nice to other women. And you are always so incredibly kind. You like break that mold and you give me faith in like women and that they can be nice to each other. And I worry about you when you're amongst other women that I don't think maybe are as nice as you are. Oh, chill. We're so well, I mean, we're having a really good time and I think you're going to be surprised by some of the things that happened and happens and happened. But you're I mean, it's good. You're going to love it. Okay, just just humor me for a second because I'm really obsessed with the show. Give me three words that you would use to describe the golden life. Spirited. Okay. Adventurous. Yeah. Heart felt. I'm intrigued. I was intrigued already. Okay. I was already going to watch it now. I'm really going to watch. So adventurous. Adventurous is like probably the the one that I like the most about that one. So I'm dying to see what kind of adventures they have. You guys on because I think maybe I get this age in our lives.

5:12I know I'm a little older than you, but some of the people that you're on the show with are my age. Like we don't care as much about what people think about us. So maybe we're a little more adventurous than we were when we were younger, which I love. Yeah. Perfect. Were you familiar with Shane and Mochler or Travis Barker before you heard this episode? So I remember them from like long ago. So I mean, she's been in the news a ton and so is he. She's had like a lot of really kind of big relationship. She's been with a lot of men that are well known. She's had babies with them. So I remember her, but she had kind of faded from my radar a little bit. I don't think that there's been anything super recent. And now she's kind of back like back in the news a little bit. So it's fun. And you know what I always loved her like she has quite a style and she's had quite a history and she's been on TV and she's been she's bottled and she's kind of gotten around. So she's an interesting lady. I like to like that she's back in the news. How about you? Did you remember her? So yeah, I remember her, but I also remember her from the show. The book and I was just reintroduced

6:13to her by Shayna. And I just, you know, we have so many questions, but my first thought out of the gate was just how knowledgeable she is about menopause. I know. I had no idea about this whole part of her life that she had this whole kind of interest in this medical background and supporting women and even supporting men in like a medical journey. And she seems so incredibly bright. And I love that when these beautiful women are also super smart and and poor their heart into something like that can help us. I think so too. And just, you know, her sharing her stories and Jenna's sharing story, you know, that just the more information that we can get out there about, you know, the iterations of menopause. I mean, my mother had a personal know. My mother had really, really bad menopause. And I was always so scared. And she as a result from bad menopause, she had severe migraines. And so my upbringing, oh my god, oh my god. I have one yesterday.

7:16Oh, sorry. And I just remember a young girl, you know, in my two, not young girls, in my two early teens. And I just could, would be like really, really, really excited and really jacked up. And then nothing, you couldn't talk to her for days. Or, question, she just couldn't go. Or, and it was just terrible as a young girl because, you know, I'm like, mommy, like, what's wrong with my mom? Yeah. And, you know, I had this perfect picture of her because she was, she was the perfect mom until these my, her menopause and her migraines really took over and just were debilitating. And just, I don't think people get like how these hormones surging through our bodies and how much impact they have on us. So I had migraine starting when I went through puberty. I got my first migraine when I was 13 years old and I've had them ever since. And, and they certainly, whenever there was like a weird surge in hormones. So I have

8:17four kids. When I was pregnant with my second daughter, or my second child, my first daughter, I had terrible migraines through that entire pregnancy and had to actually quit my work. I couldn't work. I got them every day. So like these hormones that, that, you know, she is really investigating and spending a lot of time, you know, finding remedies for, you know, we used to just have to power through them. Like your mom had to power through it. I remember coming down into the kitchen when I was maybe in middle school and my mom would have her head in the freezer. So, and I'm like, mom, what are you doing? She's like, having a hot flash and she'd have this, she'd be doing this with her bathrobe and she'd have her head in the freezer or she'd be walking outside and bear feet in the middle of the winter, trying to cool down. I don't think people understand how severe these hormone related, like all the things that, yeah, they're awful. They're caused migraines and the hot flashes are horrible, sleeping is hard. I am so thrilled that there is a person that you can turn to and... Oh, hair loss. Like just... That happened as well. Sorry, I know

9:17to do. No, no, no, you were right. There are so many other things I wasn't even thinking about, but you're like, the hair loss. Like, how hard is it for a woman? Your hair is part of your identity. Yeah, but I mean, just the migraines, I'm so sorry that you go through that and that you have to go through that. Remember as a young girl, like just being like, what's wrong with my mom? Not understanding and not knowing and even if she was like, oh, my period of whatever, I meant that didn't resonate. I had no idea. I was like, oh, okay. We don't know, in terrible cramps and all that. Right. That happened so much easier. They have no idea the things that we have to deal with like once a month. I'm so happy I'm done with the whole darn thing. I know. It's just like a lot easier. I'll get them. But you know, I just was like, I just was very, very, very impressed by her knowledge. It's just just to your point. That was great. I was like, whoa, I was like, okay, this is a podcast. Let's get started. Yeah, we don't break into that. And I had no idea that she had this passion and you know, was doing that. We should probably tell people the name of her website or the name of her

10:19organization. Oh, yeah. What's it called? Hello, Foxy, F-O-X-I, I believe. So it's with an eye at the end because I did look it up the wrong way. And it provides so many services. And I mean, really, honestly, really, really good. And like, you know, good for her. She's branching out. I love that. I love that. Yeah, that was interesting. So what do you think about Shana sharing that she and Travis did a nesting situation after the divorce with their kids? So so interesting. I heard of that. Have you heard of that arrangement before people doing that? I have. I mean, West, we don't have nesting. You're divorced. You leave and you can you move on? I've never known anybody who has done it. But I have heard of it before. And I thought, what? A wonderful thing to do for your kids if you can do it because how hard would it be? First of all, kids are having probably going through the worst thing in their lives. Their parents are separating. You know, they never imagined this was going to happen. You picture your life being perfect. You think you're always going to have both your parents and all of a sudden, they're not going to be together anymore. But they're allowing you to stay in your home with your kids, you know,

11:24your friends down the street, walking to your same bus stop, you know, in your same bad at night. I think that's such, you know, during that really hard year or two, if you can, you know, keep this going and allowing them, you know, that the comforts of home, it's amazing. But can you imagine sharing a home with somebody that maybe you're not having an amicable divorce? But I mean, this is a pond. But if you saw my eyes right now, you would be like, whoa, and I've had a lot of book talks, but I'm telling you my eyes are p- I can see expression hardly any but a little bit. I went there. You can't see it in my neither. But yeah, I'm appalled too. I was like, I mean, I agree with you. I think it's beautiful. I just, I just don't understand. I mean, if you're going to get divorced, like there's, there's so many other things that are associated, I just couldn't see the person. I mean, and I love my kids more than anything. And I would do for them. I just wouldn't be able to like have someone that I needed

12:26to separate from like permanently nesting in my house. I'd be like nest elsewhere. I do feel like it's a very unique situation, which is probably why we don't hear it very much. Shayna clearly had a really amicable divorce or separation with her ex and was able to maintain like a, because I mean, you're not doing the kids any good if you're coming together and then fighting. But you got to imagine that maybe for some people has to do with money that it's too hard to maintain different residences or maybe they have to separate and sell the main home so they can actually separate. So, you know, I think there's a lot of things that play into it. Money certainly is one of the things. But being, you know, having, you can't, I can't imagine you, you know, having that kind of situation with somebody that you are really actively still fighting with or arguing with or having, you know, problems with the separation or the divorce or the agreement or, you know, how you're splitting the kids or the money or whatever. I could see

13:27any kind of turmoil will just be exasperated if you're coming into the house and they let the kitchen messy and do the laundry. I mean, that's a trigger for me. Yeah, me too. So, Joe, and so my husband, my assessment is French and we just put up a wall between the two apartments because he traveled so much the girls could see him when he came home. But, you know, he was not in the apartment and it actually worked out really well for the kids because they didn't feel, you know, they were like, Daddy's home and they would go see him have some blueberries and come home. That was you had the perfect divorce situation. I think you may be the only person in the entire world. No, I actually, one other person whose father bought the house next door to them. And so, they used to go back and forth. But you have like the perfect divorce situation, but I can't imagine most people being able to afford that. Have two houses next door to each other. Yeah, I just was, I, you know, he, he just traveled and I, I understood, you know, I understood the assignment. I, you know, I knew that he needed to be in their lives, but I also knew that I needed to have

14:30control privacy, right? Yeah, and control. Yeah. I was going to say privacy, but yeah, control, even more. Yeah, probably above. And I can imagine that you didn't have to like have a really strict agreement about custody because they kind of lived with you. It sounds like and then visited him. Right. I just, I just said to him, I said, just love the girls and everything's fine. That's it. It's been as much time as you can. Yes. And I, I, there was, there was no expectations. So there was nothing to manage. Yeah. Perfect. Does that make sense? Do you mean like I was like, I've got the girls like my dad's like, okay, the girls are going in a ski trip. Let's go pack them up. So did, do they, are they still really close with their father? Yes. Very. And does he still live in New York City or has he moved? He lives in New York and in Venice. But I think that reason that he is close to them and he's older is because there was, he didn't have any expectations. He didn't have that he just was like, you know, just go live your life and just, you know, be a good, be a good

15:30parent when you can. Yeah. Good. I mean, be a good father. Don't parent my kids. I'll parent my kids. Did I say that loud? Nobody here. Oh, no. What happens on I do part two stays on I do part two. Exactly. Hey everyone, it's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends Paul Rod Michael Boublay, Seth Meyers, Nile Horan, Jake Shane, and making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters like Alex National. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone to go. Okay, well control is a harsh word. I would say that's a harsh word. I am more outspoken. Growing up a lot of the times because she was so quiet, I would speak for like the both of us. Now I'm working on like thinking a mom is really not I'm taking before I speak. And Joey King, you know, if you're like mom is yelling at your sibling and even if you're annoyed with your sibling, you just like won't let that slide. It's like, you only can yell at your sibling. I'm like, you can't do that here. That is not what I'm talking

16:34about. Like that. I just want to talk about it. Plus, we've been taking your calls, listening to your voice mails and giving advice or at least trying to. So if you've got catching up to do now's the perfect time. Listen to Hey Jonas on the iHeartReadyWap Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and health captive for nine months. I survived and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart and these are the survivor files. I just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying, shut up, don't say anything. Every week, I'm with survivors who lived through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up without a doubt, he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from

17:37them. Their story is about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to the survivor files with Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartReadyWap Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi, this is Kylie Breakman, Angel Jaretana, Jeremy Colhane, Patrick McDonald, and we're the hosts of the artists on artists on artists on artists podcast. The improvised character comedy podcast were each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is foe journal. I don't know, have you guys heard of foe journaling? Yeah, it's reading. It's called reading. So we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay. A panel of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class? No! I've been dying too. I'm so sorry. I'm seeing a reading of Sudako in the Pousen, Thousand Paper Cranes by Auderman Donald at the Wonderland Bookstore. 14. That's crazy. I went to the Wonderland Bookstore yesterday and I heard Nora Jones do a reading of Zero Dark 30. No way! Patrick of the last bookstore though, Kim Kattroll is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday.

18:44A panel of Eurovision participants. And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He, he winks on Halloween. It's right up next to the microphone. I hear you get almost here, the eyelashes hit each other. You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to artists on artists on artists on the I heard Radio App, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. By age, a rather than or so, at least 70 percent have a phone. Middle school is a different world than the one we grew up in. I'm Dr. Joy and this is therapy for Black girls. We spend real time on it in our surviving middle school run. Bringing in a child psychologist and a psychiatrist who's raising two Black girls of his own to talk about what's really going on with our kids right now. So it's literally physiological and neurological, air psychological chaos happening all this seems off. We got into group chats and gaming, friendships and bullying, and how to tell the difference between healthy monitoring and the kind of surveillance that erodes trust. You're belonging. You could think of belonging as I can be myself

19:49and I can still be accepted. And then they're fitting in. Spitting in says I have to change who I am in order to avoid rejection. Then we turn the conversation toward the fathers, sitting down with therapists, caregains on Black fatherhood, and what it means to raise a daughter through this stage. You don't have more shorts so you can't do flips, you have on the dress here, across your legs. That's the range of this run. From screen time to identity to the fathers doing the work at home. You have to get off her device. But the reality is there's a lot of life out there that we don't want you as your adult in the life to miss out on. This has been our surviving middle school run brought to you by the people who spend their careers thinking about exactly this. I'm Dr. Joy. Listen to therapy for Black girls on the I Heart Radio app Apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast. Okay, I have to ask you about. I loved the conversation that the two of them had about both Jana and Shayna expressed regrets from their past relationships. So Jana said, first of all,

20:53that even though she tried her hardest in her marriage, she wishes that she would have left sooner. And Shayna kind of said the same thing that she wishes she hadn't accepted this abusive treatment that she had in a previous relationship, not in her marriage, but in a previous marriage. Do you have any regrets from a past relationship that you let it go on for way too long? Do you think like every relationship we have is like part of the learning curve? And of course, I mean, my ex-husband got divorced and then I met a guy that was younger than me, you know, 10 years younger. And there was just, you know, he was not the ideal human. And you know, it was just was not exactly how I wanted it to be. And so we would break up and then we would get back together and we break up. And, you know, at the time too, in my defense, I was working, I was, you know, editor of three magazines, like I was writing books, I had two young girls and I just had so much on my plate that, you know, I kind of just let

21:59something, I kind of like let it go on and didn't take control of it. And that was my that was my fault. And I should have been the bigger person and said, this is not working out. We're, you know, we're not we're never doing this again. But because I was so busy, I just kind of let things slide that shouldn't have. And so I am dised with her a lot. I mean, with Shane a lot, because things just happen, you know, just, you know, just life just happens. I know that sounds so cliche, but it just does. And, you know, it's so easy for us to say now, wow, you know, we should have done this. We should have done that. But when you're in the middle of it, you're not thinking like that. You're like, oh my God, my kids, my life, you know, I wasn't thinking about like relationship. I was just thinking about my kids and making money and just making sure that they had everything. Yeah. So it's just, you know, we're in a different time now, you know, I mean, I feel like it's so much easier. I feel like for me, I would stay in relationships

23:01longer than I should have because I thought, is this as good as it gets? Like, like, even if I'm not 100% happy, maybe if I'm 75% happy, I mean, never find this much happy again. So I should just stay in this because it's good enough. It's not bad. I'm like, I was never in an abuse relationship. But there's also an relationship that maybe wasn't like so love-filled or so like exciting or like, I knew that there were red flags, maybe the way we resolve conflict or, you know, whatever it was, I stayed in too long because I just thought maybe this is all there is and I'm not going to find anything better. I mean, that's just so honest. And I just, I really, really respect you being open about that. And I think that's something that's natural. I think that's something that happens all the time. I think that women just kind of feel like there are so many single women that, you know, are trying to find love and, you know, myself included. And, you know, when I meet someone, I just think to myself, oh my god, is he the, is he going to be the person?

24:02Don't literally like, is this the person? Is this the person? I know. Instead of just allowing the relationship to, you know, unfold valve and unfold. I mean, who knows? Maybe I should go on the golden bachelor's. You should. Boy, would they love to have you? I don't think, honestly, Kelly, there is not a guy good enough out there for you that we're going to have on the show. It's, they have a hard time finding men to be on the show, to be honest with you. And I, um, the older men, younger men, they have a whole, the whole slew of them that want to be on the show because they see fame. Older men don't see fame. They see, oh, why am I going to do this to my life? Why am I going to embarrass myself? Why am I going to do this? Like, I can just sit at home and watch football with my buddies. And I don't think they care as much about finding like their chapter two as we do. Right. I, I missed being a couple. I missed having my person. I missed having couple friends. And I don't think guys care as much. They're just as happy having their guy friends

25:03going playing golf and watching football in the weekends where we're looking for like, we like our couple relationships. We like, we like, we like, we like, we're with other couples. And I don't think guys care as much. Right. You know, it's interesting because my last boyfriend, like, we just, he had this amazing friend group. And so we would spend so much time together. And like his, the girl, the wives and the girlfriends, we all became so close and had so much fun. And, you know, as much as I, you know, kind of mourn that relationship, I really, really more in the friendships. I was like, I was loving, I was like, oh my god, where are my girls? I've had that before or you love their kids or you love some other part of their life. And I loved his kids. And I was happy we were having the best time. Like literally I was having so much fun. Okay, so I did listen to your podcast with Susan and Kathy. But I feel like maybe not everybody that's listened to this podcast, listen to that. So will you just tell the listeners a little bit about what happened there? Because I heard and it broke my heart. But I feel like you did the right thing. But can you like just maybe give us a quick synopsis? I mean, it's terrible because I had a

26:06breast cancer scare. And, you know, in his defense, he didn't really, I was, I didn't articulate. I didn't say I'm having a breast cancer scare. Something's really wrong with me. I need to take care of it. I said, oh, you know, just a little something. Because I, I had only known him for a couple of months. And, you know, I just didn't feel like I could put that kind of responsibility on him. And then I know I was going on the show. So I was like, first of all, I had this breast cancer scare. And I was having, I was literally like, when you have a scare like that, Joan, you, you, the, the idea that I would not be able to, I'm not going to cry, like literally. Yeah. The idea that I was not going to be there for my kids after I've done everything for my kids, put every single scent that I've earned into their brains. So they're going to be the most, there can be the most amazing children in the world. Yeah. Now, then I wasn't going to be there. I just was like, oh, my God. Oh, my God. Now, like it really, really, really hit me terrifying. And it's not his responsibility. It isn't. I just really rubbed me the wrong way. And then

27:10when I knew I was going on the show, I just was like, I can't go on a television show with someone that I, that is not going to be a forever person. Yeah. And that, that sign. And actually, that was the most mature thing that I've done in a really long time. And it would have really changed your interactions with the women on the show because I think everybody else on the show say, all right? Right. It's up for LeWan. It would have been right. Exactly. Yeah. So I think it would have changed your interaction. So like in the long run for like the health of the show or for the health of you and you maintaining, you know, your normal persona, like I feel like you probably did the right thing. But I love that you just said it wasn't his responsibility. And I think as women, we don't want to be dependent. Like we don't want to seem like dependents. We want to seem really independent. And like I'm going to, I can take care of my own. And I don't need you to help me. And, but you are really vulnerable. And we don't feel comfortable being vulnerable. That's right. Yeah. Right. Right. You know, again, like I know I always say this, but I am from the Midwest. And we're just like, we just are take care of things kind of personalities. And in New York,

28:13it's like, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, and me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, and it's just like, I'm just not raised like that. And so, and he's, and I'm not talking to saying that he is. But most of my friends were like, oh my god, you didn't, and I was like, first of all, like, I don't even understand what you're saying. You're speaking so quickly. And I, I'm like freaking out inside. So can you turn down the volume on your concern? And please, just let me try to get through this. That be a text, please. I just think you're probably of, you know, honestly, it's just, it's just a different upbringing. And so I mean, you know, I, I really, he's such a great guy. And he is, I mean, whoever gets to go out with him is like so lucky because he's such a stellar human. I really, really, really believe that. Do you think there's ever going to be a chapter two for you guys? You know, I don't, I don't know. I mean, I really don't know. I need to get through the show and kind of just see where I am when the show after the show finishes. And, you know, I just, it's funny that you said that because like today, I was on my, on my run, I was like, you know,

29:18I just want to give myself some grace, Joan, you know, I've just been through so much. The show is really exciting, but it's also very, very difficult. And I just want to give myself a little grace. And I think when I'm in that mode, the person will be around for me at that time. Do you know what I mean? I don't want to meet someone right now. Like I'm like, I'm filming the volume to the work, you know, I have to fight with some real housewives. I have an argument to have on camera. I gotta go. I'm gonna hit me right now. And so, you know, I just want to just give myself some grace and we'll see what happens after the after the show. So much about relationships are about finding the right person at the right time. I mean, I think we've all found the right person at the wrong time. And we've all found the wrong person at the right time. Like getting into timing perfectly with the right person is really, really hard. He was just like the right person at the wrong time. Yeah, he just was the wrong time.

30:20So you never, you never, you never know. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just trying to like, say like in my, oh, my personal like personal personal self bubble. I'm just trying to say like true to myself. And you never know. I'm so glad that your breast cancer scares over. Thank you. I wish you had let me know. I would have flown there and like snuggled down with pink fuzzy slippers with you and gotten you through that. Well, I was in LA with you. I had to go on steroids because I was like such a mess to come to LA. And I wanted to go to LA. I was like, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna, not live. Yeah. Wow. I would, I'm sorry, sweetie. No, no, no, no, no, thanks too. You can't, you know, what are you going to do? Be like, hey, Joan. I got I had something like, well, I just, I had a thyroid cancer scared. So I was coming off. So I was going on to gold. I was going to be golden about to wrap. And I had like a physical, they make you tap a physical, which they should.

31:24So I had a physical and hemorrhage and my thyroid hormone was really off like really off. So my doctor said, well, we don't have time to like do scans and do all the tests we need to do. You know, it'll be fine. Take care of it when you get back. So now I am worried the entire, so of course I Google it immediately. And it says if you're the, you know, numbers above like eight. And I was like 12.5. You likely have thyroid cancer. And I was like, oh my god. So I'm going to like brewing in my head the entire time I'm filming golden bachelor. I had this in my mind that I have thyroid cancer. And so I get home and I have to do press really soon after that. So there's only like a month that turn around between you finish filming and the show comes out. So and when the show comes out, the week the show comes out, you do all of your press in New York City. So I go and get a sonogram of my thyroid and they do another blood test. And I'm waiting for the results. And I'm thinking, okay, well, so I got to figure out how I'm going to do this. I'm going to probably

32:25have to have surgery in the practice to remove my thyroid. And I've read all about it. And it's, you know, somewhat curable and like I could be okay. But I'm just like going through this whole thing. And but I'm like, I don't want this to be my story. And I want cancer to be my story coming off of the golden bachelor. That's all they'll talk about if that's what happened. So I'm going to keep it a secret. And I'm going to wear all high dresses. So I have this whole idea of how I'm going to get through like the next four months without anybody knowing that I thyroid cancer. Well, it comes out that I just have nodules on my thyroid. And I just have to check every year. And they're fine. And they could turn into something but very likely won't. So but it was like I was scared like three months. I was just I was sick to my stomach every time I thought about it. I had like a panic attack. I mean, of course, but I love that you're so like organized trying to figure out what the turtle neck. I'm like, I want to wear high neck dresses like sleeveless. They're going to be really pretty. But I'm going to have this big scar here. They're my pride. Right. Yeah. It was all about the dresses. I know. I mean, that's so stressful too when you're filming and you're like looking for love and trying to be vulnerable and be open and just trying to keep pushing that back, pushing that back. Oh my god. I didn't I didn't tell a soul. It's

33:30all no one. Oh my god. So I haven't really answered your question. How have you gone about introducing men to your children while you were dating? Hey everyone, it's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast. We've been catching up with some great friends Paul Rod Michael Wubley, Seth Meyers, Nile Horan, Jake Shane, and making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters like Alex National. She likes to control everyone and tell everyone to do that. Okay, well control is a harsh word. I would say that's a harsh word. I am more outspoken. Growing up a lot of the times because she was so quiet, I would speak for like the both of us. Now I'm working on like thinking a mom. It's really not a good thing before I speak. And Joey King. You know if you're like mom is yelling at your sibling and even if you're annoyed with your sibling, you just like won't let that slide. It's like you only you can yell at your sibling. I'm like you can't do that here. That is not what I want to talk about her like that. I just want to talk about her. Plus we've been taking your calls listening to your voicemails and

34:34giving advice or at least trying to. So if you've got catching up to do now's the perfect time. Listen to Hey Jonas on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. When I was 14 years old, I was kidnapped and health captive for nine months. I survived and I've spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them. I'm Elizabeth Smart and these are the survivor files. I just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying shut up. Don't say anything. Every week I'm with survivors who live through the unthinkable. I knew if he woke up without a doubt he was going to hurt me. I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and I just started screaming. They are abducted, stalked, controlled and nearly silenced. But these aren't stories about what's taken from them. Their stories about what it takes to make it out alive. Listen to the survivor files with the

35:38Elizabeth Smart on the iHeartRadio app Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts. Hi this is Kylie Breakman, Angel Jaretana, Jeremy Colhane, Cash McDonald, and we're the hosts of the artists on artists on artists on artists podcast. The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast were each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft. Join us for a panel of wellness influencers. What I try to do is faux journal. I don't know if you guys heard of faux journaling. Yeah it's reading. It's called reading. So you're so we don't like to use that word anymore. Okay a panel of New Yorker cartoonists. Have you guys done Terry Gross's Peloton class? No! I've been dying too. I'm so sorry I'm seeing a reading of Sudako in the Thousand Paper Cranes by Audrement Donald at the Wonderland bookstore 14. That's crazy. I went to the Wonderland bookstore yesterday and I heard New York Jones do a reading of Zero Dark Thirty. No way! I have to come to the last bookstore though. Kim Catrol is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday. A panel of Eurovision participants.

36:41And we do a little Halloween sometimes. Does the Pope dress up? He winks on Halloween. It's right up next to the microphone. I hear you get the elbows here. The eyelashes hit each other. You never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween. Listen to artists on artists on artists on artists on the I heard Radio App, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. By age of rather than or so at least 70% have a phone. Middle school is a different world than the one we grew up in. I'm Dr. Joy and this is therapy for Black Girls. We spent real time on it in our surviving middle school run, bringing in a child psychologist and a psychiatrist who's raising two Black girls of his own to talk about what's really going on with our kids right now. So it's literally physiological and neurological and psychological chaos happening all this even though we got into group chats and gaming, friendships and bullying. And how to tell the difference between healthy monitoring and the kind of surveillance that a road's trust. There's belonging that you could think of belonging as

37:43I can be myself and I can still be accepted and then they're fitting in. Spitting in says I have to change who I am in order to avoid rejection. Then we turn the conversation toward the fathers sitting down with therapists, cure gains on Black fatherhood and what it means to raise a daughter through this stage. You don't have more shorts so you can't do flips, you have on the dress here across your legs. That's the range of this run from screen time to identity to the fathers doing the work at home. How to get off her device? But the reality is there's a lot of life out there that we don't want you as your adults in their life to miss out on. This has been our surviving middle school run. Brought to you by the people who spend their careers thinking about exactly this. I'm Dr. Joy. Listen to therapy for Black Girls on the iHeartReneo app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your pie. So I think it's a little easier. I was married for 32 years. I was at the John for 36 and my kids were grown. John passed away. So my youngest was 25. My oldest was 31 so I

38:50have four kids so between 25 and 31. So introducing them, it wasn't like I was saying like here is potentially a new person in your life that you're going to have to live with or that's going to act like a father to you or going to be like some like in some capacity like affecting their lives that much they were all moved out of my home and they all had lives of their own. One of my two of my kids had kids of their own already. So really after John died, my kids were all you know kind of grown and by the time chalk came into the life, they were even out of my house. So I don't think it was super hard for me and they wanted me to find somebody. They were really open to me to me find somebody. I would I introduce them only to like two men and I'd be like oh like Frank's going to come over and watch the game like the football game with us and you know so that was okay. It was more uncomfortable for me to introduce men to my mother-in-law. I'm still very, very close to my mother-in-law. I see her several times a week. She lives very close to me. She babysits one of my grandkids twice a week. You know she I'm very very very close to my mother-in-law

39:53and that was actually more comfortable for me to introduce her to somebody and she was always couldn't have been any nicer. You're very welcoming but that was hard for me. How about you? You know so when my you know my kids were very very young when I got divorced. They were five and seven and so again like my ex-husband lived next door with the wall between us. The Great Wall of China. The Great Wall of New York. And because you know I was working in with magazines and I was I didn't have to always be in the office. I just went to the office for certain things. But most of the most of the things I was doing was writing and people would come and meet me. The photographers would come meet me. The styles would come meet me. I'm excited on kids. And so there were always people around. Always. And if I you know if I if there was someone that was going to date with them they would see them they'd be like hi you know whatever they wouldn't even flinch. They never even they never even like who are you dating who's that person like it could have been a work colleague they didn't know they didn't differentiate between the people

40:56coming in and right. So that was easy. Okay. What was it was a lot easier for me. And you know yeah I mean there was you know there weren't that many guys that I would bring into my family home clearly. How about when they were teenagers I'm guessing at that point they may have noticed things a little different like the way you acted to people in your home. But still they didn't I never said anything and there was just so many people. I mean I'm talking like a lot of people and a lot of gay men were always around me. And so they just never they just didn't you know unless there was like a special friend I would say like this is a special friend that's my therapist told me to do so you know that's what I would say. And they'd be like what is the special friend I was like I'm not gonna go to details. Yeah. So but I think it's I think it's all it's very subjective you know it's like like you were saying like your kids were okay but your mother and all which I love so much that you guys are so close that's so beautiful. But I think that you know if you're like you know if you're living in a house and you're living in like Illinois where I'm from and you know a guide

41:59comes over it's obvious when you're living in New York City and you work from home and all these people are coming into your house it's not as obvious. So you and I got ahead it easy really. We did have that that awkward this is you know and band that is special to me in my life now and right like you're gonna have to like him or room. I hope you're gonna like him. And by the way I mean this is an awful thing to say but even the guys that I did date like even if they were the best guys in the world I was solely to focus on making money for my kids that even if they were like I'm unbelievable fantastic. My focus was my breaking money for my children and they were second and they knew it. Well you know what I'm not sure if that ever changes. It's hard for a man it's hard it's hard for a man to be. I have to be completely honest about that I'm not sure my focus a man will ever be come before my kids no matter what. I and my kids are grown like my my oldest is 36 and my youngest is 30 and my kids will always be number one because you know what you only get one mom. I could probably have a million men or maybe not maybe I'll never have another man

43:04again whatever but my kids only ever have me as their mother and I will they that will always be my number one position in life as their mother. And I love that and I think that's like a beautiful beautiful beautiful sentiment and I feel the same way. You think we will find men that will think that's okay like accept that position. I think it has to be a very very healthy man. Yep. Who has a lot of respect for I mean that's that's why you know it's like I have all these you know I have all these like parameters for these guys they have to be like a very healthy human not like physically I'm talking mentally healthy human. Yeah right because I could not be with a man who doesn't have respect for his ex-wife. If you talk badly by your ex-wife or don't they are disrespectful to them in any way possible like that's just not my vibe. Like I know for people think it's fun I saw my thing it's like you have to figure it out and if you can't figure it out you know then that's something you need to you know you may need to therapist before you we get to get back

44:06together. I feel like it's a whole well I feel like it's a whole element about being a gentleman. Like my I was raised my father was the ultimate gentleman. He never cussed he never spoke poorly about really anybody. He just was a kind human. He immigrated here from Holland. He was just a gentleman and I like my so my bar is very high for men. When it comes we're talking ill about people like talking about ex-wives or talking about previous relationships I just feel like a gentleman does that and so like that's that's a problem for me. It's a red flag for me. I just not talk about his wife poorly. I know instances I know why they're divorced but I know very few stories. I know very little. He says you know I he's the mother of my kids and they have a healthy relationship and now he's really good about not talking about his ex-wife. I love that. I love that because that makes you you know I think that I think the bottom line to

45:06that is that like what makes a woman feel safe and when you're constantly talking ill about your ex it doesn't make you feel safe. It really doesn't because if he talks poorly about an ex and he'll talk poorly about you to the next woman. If there's an ex-wife. Yeah. Exactly. Are there instances you wish you could have done different when it came to dating as a single parent? Do you wish you'd spent more time you'd given more to a guy or given less to a guy and or skip the whole thing? You know and like I just you know I just kind of said I nodded to that about you know I just was working so much and you know I you can't I mean I was working my impetus was pure. Yeah like I was working because I was educating brains. I was not working because I wanted a new Chanel bag. No. No I want no I want a new Chanel bag. No but I'm just being facetious but I mean back then

46:11like I wasn't working because I was feeling gorgeous and I was like wow I'm gonna work I'm gonna be this worker like I was working because I was making money and I had a motive and I knew what the end game was and I knew how much money I needed to make every single semester and I made it happen. Do you think that you maybe wasted some of your really good years? So like this age it's very hard to find a single man that we want. Do you but back then like when we were younger and I was still married so when you were younger do you think that you wasted some years where there were maybe way more eligible men? Yes I mean I really wanted to have more kids like I mean I thought I would have had like four or five kids like I always wanted kids and my ex-husband was older and I you know I just he just you know he loves my girls but he didn't want to have all these you didn't want to have a lot of kids. Yeah and I really really wanted that. I think that when I was

47:13single I you know was a big model I was an editor so I was like the bright and shiny toy for the single guys in New York and instead of seeing me as a someone that they wanted to make sure that I was safe they wanted to take me out to dinner and they were like oh my god look what I'm going out with. I was like oh yeah he's like you I'm like wow great for you. I bet they did love me with you and you know that was nice for them but I always I honestly would leave dates and I just felt like very like disappointed is not the right word. I just was like why did I waste my time I came at home like you know drinking tea reading books, hand with my kids watching stupid movies. Yeah. You know screaming at them about homework I could have been doing the things that I love to do. Yeah because you were working all day so you were you were probably tired by the end of the day and then to make an effort to go with a guy and it not be great was probably like why did I waste my time. Right yeah I was I used to think to myself why did I just waste my time. Yeah so I love

48:15Sheena's story when she talked about reconnecting with the guy I'm trying to remember his name that she was having love with before and the kind of reconnect with him throughout her dating career. Greg yes Greg thank you thank you and they finally it sounds like maybe reconnected at the right person at the right time. Would you ever go back and visit maybe an old old love? I know we talked about the your most recent old love and maybe there's potential but there's is there somebody lurking in the back of your brain that you dated or you would have liked to have dated that is still lurking there and you'd like to maybe reconnect with. I mean there was one guy that I really really liked that my kids really liked but he had just gotten out of a marriage and he wasn't ready and he was he had a you know he didn't his marriage didn't felt fair well for him but he was a great great guy and I really really liked him but again I'm also kind of you know it's like I know when if they're not if they're just having a good time I'm just like no no this is not the

49:17vibe. No no no have you ever thought about like trying to find him or do you still know where I know where he is like he'll DM me all the time he's like keeks my nickname is Keekie so he's like Keek look great looking I'm like oh my god stop. Okay so do you think he's a playboy? I mean I don't mean to playboy I just think that he went through a lot and I think that it's it's a it's a testament to him to like where he is in his life because he's still not married and he's still never had kids and he loved kids and he's a very bright guy very successful guy. And never had kids it sounds like that well for a guy that ship hasn't sailed they can have them when they're much older but I want to have more kids. Yeah and so you guys would have been perfect together. Right exactly yeah okay and I made the story with the when she when she ain't a talks about meeting Greg and it's just like I mean she's her voice the tone in her voice I was like oh my he's done she found him she's like there you are done yeah you're like you're the she said she

50:18literally pointed and said you're the one I want to spend the rest of my life with but you know she kept he kept playing in her story he never left her book he had chapters throughout her whole story and she it just finally hit the right person at the right time and that's right and that is key. Hey everyone it's the Jonas Brothers with the Hey Jonas podcast we've been catching up with some great friends Paul Rod Michael Blay Seth Meyers, Kyle Horan Jake Shane and making some new friends while getting into what's really like to have sisters like Alex National. She likes to control everyone okay well control is a harsh word I would say that's a harsh word I am more outspoken growing up a lot of the times because she was so quiet I would speak for like the both of us now I'm working on like thinking a mom is really not good thinking before I speak and Joey King you know if you're like mom is yelling at your sibling and even if you're annoyed with your sibling you just like won't let that slide it's like you only you can yell at your sibling I'm like you can't do that here

51:23about her like I just like that plus we've been taking your calls listening to your voice mails and giving advice or at least trying to so if you've got catching up to do now's the perfect time listen to hey Jonas on the iHeartReadyWap Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts when I was 14 years old I was kidnapped and health captive for nine months I survived and I have spent my life exploring how other people survive what should have destroyed them I'm a Elizabeth smart and these are the survivor files you just remember this low taunting voice next to my ear saying shut up don't say anything every week I'm with survivors who lived through the unthinkable I knew if he woke up without a doubt he was going to hurt me I started feeling that there was someone at the end of my bed and I just started screaming they are abducted, stalked, controlled and nearly silenced but these aren't stories about what's taken from them

52:27their stories about what it takes to make it out alive listen to the survivor files with the Elizabeth smart on the iHeartReadyWap Apple Podcast or wherever you get your podcasts hi this is Kylie breakman angel jaretana jermick olhane kaskan McDonald and we're the hosts of the artist on artists on artists on artists podcast the improvised character comedy podcast were each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft join us for a panel of wellness influencers what I try to do is faux journal I don't know if you guys heard of faux journaling yeah it's reading it's called reading you so you're so we don't like to use that word anymore okay a panel of new yorker cartoonists have you guys done terry grosses peloton class no i've been dying too i'm so sorry i'm i'm seeing a reading of siddhaka in the thousand thousand paper cranes by adrumant donalds at the wonderland bookstore 14 that's crazy i went to the wonderland bookstore yesterday and i heard nor jones do a reading of zero dark thirty no way i have to come to the last bookstore though

53:29kim katral is reading the guitar tabs of yesterday a panel of Eurovision participants and we do a little Halloween sometimes does the pope dress up he he winks on a low in it's right of next to the microphone you get i hear you get the elbows here the eyelashes hate each other you never seen it least so quiet as when the pope gets up to wink on halloween listen to artists on artists on artists on artists on the i heard radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts by a java ravin or so at least 70 percent have a phone middle school is a different world than the one we grew up in i'm dr. joey and this is therapy for black girls we spent real time on it in our surviving noodle school run bringing in a child psychologist and a psychiatrist who's raising two black girls of his own to talk about what's really going on with our kids right now so it's literally physiological and neurological and psychological chaos happening all this in job we got into group chats and gaming friendships and bullying and how to tell the difference between healthy monitoring

54:32and the kind of surveillance that a road's trust you're belonging you could think of belonging as i can be myself and i can still be accepted and then they're fitting in fitting in says i have to change who i am in order to avoid rejection then we turn the conversation toward the fathers sitting down with therapists cure gains on black fatherhood and what it means to raise a daughter through this stage you don't have more shorts so you can't do flips you have on the dress you up across your legs that's the range of this run from screen time to identity to the fathers doing the work at home how to get off her device but the reality is there's a lot of life out there that we don't want you as your adults in their life to miss out on this has been our surviving middle school run brought to you by the people who spend their careers thinking about exactly this i'm dr. joey listen to therapy for black girls on the i heart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your tied to him and then when she said oh my god i would marry him i don't know how much i like him

55:44and she's like i just want to marry him when i get out i feel like we're going to hear an engagement room or two i just thought that was so honest i really liked your honesty i really liked her i was just like oh my god no and i didn't expect to at all maybe they're i loved her i know i know no i was very i was like in a hurry i was like well because jane is so sweet and soft and just very thoughtful so i was like maybe it's just because jane you know jana is so sweet like that that she's bringing this out in her and i was like no no no this woman is like she knows what's going on she's very glued into her life and how she's navigated her world um i have said some stuff in the past i have to admit that i would that um of how like you know she is with travis's new wife and their kids so yeah i have said something no okay but i take it all back because i just was so moved by her today i just i did i just thought she was she's really really beautiful human i loved how she owned all of her mistakes in in like the past and um and like kind of shown how

56:48she's grown and i think she's like and sounds like she's super close to her kids and like now she found another love i just feel like she maybe she finally found the right one and sometimes it takes people five tries or however many tries and right and then they find it she might be um when she was talking about her daughter and how she has to go back and forth and LA detects us because of the emergence because she was the emergency room that's concerned i mean that literally broke my heart yeah i listened to that she spoke about it very matter of factly and i'm sure it's way more emotional than she let on because when your child is suffering particularly mentally honestly i almost feel like that's even harder um i've had kids that have suffered and you know especially after my husband died um like all every we all suffered it was all really really hard and you know like it's hard to like so if they have a broken arm or if they have a concussion or if they have something wrong with their eyes you you go and you seek medical attention and they fix it mental illness is so much harder and it sounds like yeah her daughter is really really like

57:52she's twenty hundred old sounds it's just super hard to deal with that and it sounds like she's probably in college like all of that is hard i i don't know yeah that that would scare me yeah i i totally agree and i that's exactly what i thought i was just like that's something that you can't like you can't put a bandaid on no do you know what i mean like you can't come and say like we're gonna go to the doctor we're gonna get that taken care of yeah this is long term it takes a while to heal like from mental illness from things like that yeah and 21 is a really vulnerable age and hard just to be a 21 year old girl anyway with all the social you know pressures that we have i mean i remember being 21 i mean it was like maybe some of the best times in my life and probably some of the hardest but also she has on top of all of that she has famous parents yeah very famous parents yeah yeah and you wonder how that all plays out that are in the news and have had some you know have had a past and so that you know you that your their past follows you

58:53also people know about you and you know they even had to talk about she mentioned that she connected with Travis and said do our kids have security in New York like oh kids are in New York do they have security i'm like wow your kids have to have security that's kind of scary i thought so too i was like security huh i i i i i i i honestly i was like wait wait a minute security i was like security oh they're Kardashians right but her kids with Travis are not Kardashians and she was talking about her kids having security oh but her kids they travel with them travel with them also yeah that makes a one that are together in New York or wherever around court need hard access to have that right and they have that with them okay that makes more sense i was like wow i mean he was famous i mean obviously but like really famous but like i mean yeah but i mean i wouldn't think that he would need security i wouldn't either i wouldn't think i wouldn't think most people that pass him on the street aren't gonna know who he is i agree i was like wait what yeah i was like what did you talk

59:55about i didn't understand that yeah so where are kids do deal with that too so that they are really in the limelight with the Kardashians yes i mean that is a terrible terrible terrible terrible life they didn't ask for that yeah especially since like they got thrust into this as kind of like adults but remember like you know Kim she was held at gunpoint oh i know when she was in Paris when she was around yes scary you know i totally get how the Kardashians need security i didn't realize i now i get the whole security conditions children right totally get that yeah i would be scared for my kids and that must be like hard on her knowing that her kids are in that kind of situation like she had to ask today's security in New York like to have to worry about your kids at that level that they security yeah that's scary it's really scary yeah that they were dragged into that now life also it's like almost being a royal right it is it's exactly yes like you have to worry about

1:00:56kidnapping that's a horror that's a horror story that we should probably do a podcast on oh this is good because i think you have comments about this it sounded like shena and travis wife Courtney Kardashian are not very close Kelly how have you handled that dynamic when your ex-husband has had a new woman in his life was it difficult for you okay you're never gonna believe it but i before we got divorced are separated i introduced Jill to one of my friends who's in beautiful beautiful human and i was just like here you go i was like i knew the one give to you so i introduced them and she is unbelievable and they were together for a very long time i love that did you ever ask him to return the favor uh no no you didn't think you know i just i couldn't you know he's made he's been you know he's dated a million a married a million a million a million models and i just couldn't have that around my kids so you did it for your kids you wanted him to have the right person

1:02:01i did and you did a great job i did she's if i i can't tell you her name um but she is a fantastic fantastic human i love that so they're not together anymore but they did spend a lot of time together yeah like i mean they were together for over seven years i mean a long time so it's a really nice relationship i'm very proud of them actually java you did a good job and i'm proud that you did that like that took a lot of kind of self-confidence because like handing off the person that like you once loved is even probably hard even if you don't love them anymore like they're still part of you and part of your story and to give them another story like start the next chapter help them start was really great of you i just was like my father was just like we need to tie bow in this we're done yeah so let me ask you does he is he married now or does he have a new relationship he does he has a great relationship and she's really really smart and been very very very kind to my ex and he's very happy great and she's very very gracious to my kids and that

1:03:05means so much have your kids liked all of his relationships since your divorce or you know i have to say like you know he's you know he went back to a couple of younger models which is you know it's fine that's like you know that's his vibe which is fine but then he also dated one and one of his uh girlfriends was is my client i love her and she's a fantastic Venezuelan brilliant brilliant woman and then his current girlfriend is just a very very smart English woman and she's lovely so you know what i mean like i just feel like okay yeah the girl and the girls are great i mean by the way even if they weren't my girls would be like nice to see you because you raised nice girls because i'm like you don't say anything bad about anyone like even in even ingest like it does yeah it's like doesn't it's it's just a disservice to you well you've sent a great example um that you don't need to put other people down to make yourself look good it's not right now and you're you do a good example for your daughters can you tell my um my co-stars that i really feel like i need to come on and have a talk with them i don't think they know

1:04:10how much you are i don't know how they could have missed that i'll do guest of show and i'm just here to tell you all people i'd like to make an announcement public announcement oh my gosh obviously don't know the Kelly i know give her a chance yeah well i mean they got to make tv i had a percent yeah that's all good it's all good that's where you guys are getting the award getting the award it'd be so fun but you know it's like i mean i you know i appreciate you complimenting me on that and that you know it took a lot it took a lot out of me doing me and like i just was but i knew what i had to do i knew that i had to not be with them anymore i knew i had to start my own life i knew i had to really really be laser focus on work and i knew i had to go for it because i was 36 years old and it was like the window was if i was going to meet someone it was then and because i had to work so much you just put that on the back burner i i didn't see people

1:05:15stone i didn't even like i didn't i would be like and i mean you can ask any guy that if i gave you their number and you're like so what do they have to tell it they'd be like oh she was so great she just was having a good time like yeah they would never say she was serious they would never say oh she wanted to get married or they would never say like you know she won't have more kids or i just i just didn't give off that energy and you know guys really picked up on that i mean and i don't think that you could have i don't think there's enough room in your life when you talk about how much you were working and how much time you wanted to spend with your kids there just wasn't enough time for a man i mean like where would he fit into that right you wouldn't have right and you did you did it your way and i think a lot of women do it our way and that's why maybe there are so many single women out there and not that many single men okay Kelly i have had the best time talking i think we could stay on this podcast for like four hours but they're making it now so are you ready to find love again in your chapter two we're here to help send us an email or leave us a voice

1:06:16mail all the info is in the show notes follow us on socials too i do part two and i heart radio podcast for falling in love is the main objective what up this j valentine co-host of the r&b money podcast alongside my brother r&b legend tank together we've built a space for artists executives and fans of r&b music to reminisce and tell the real stories behind the music i have no money i was hood famous they think you're gonna get everybody out we live in a project and real love came out they hear them music and we had nothing from smoky robinson to marie j blodge v2k to jill scott if you're a super dedicated r&b fan this is where you belong listen to r&b money from the black effect podcast network on the i heart radio app apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast the world cup is over but if you caught the soccer bug and aren't sure what to do now check out our podcast big kick energy i'm camren dicker the kicker from the loss angeles chargers and i'm here with timmy tillman current lfc star player so we know a little something about kicking balls each week will tackle things like who's winning the premier league this year what do you think is harder scoring a penalty

1:07:20kick or scoring a field goal join us each week for a quick chat with your soccer loving bros about the best sport in the world soccer just don't tell my coaches i said that listen to big kick energy on the i heart radio app apple podcast or wherever you listen to podcasts hey it's alex bould one this season on my podcast here's the thing i talked to actor seven root i'm a people watcher you see that guy going down the drain though yeah i can use that and open igloo co founder allia mohammad i love staying on top of what is going on in our city what is on renter's minds and taking all of that knowledge to build a platform that hopefully is going to make new york city better in the long run listen to here's the thing on the i heart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts 30 years ago in island off manhattan almost brought down new york city who will you trust your friends and neighbors who you trust the people five miles overseas this is a story about neighbors turning on each other and what happens when i've forgotten place

1:08:23it's had enough but we're not stopping are we listen to revisionist history the statin island problem on the i heart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts this is an i heart podcast guaranteed human