224. stop ‘shoulding’ + shaming yourself

#224 in this week’s solo episode, i open up about the mental health struggle i’ve recently been having and how i’ve developed a ‘should’ mentality around it. i explain how when we constantly tell ourselves we ‘should’ be a certain way with our mental health, we’re actually creating shame and stopping ourselves from living our best lives.

in this episode, i break down how we can all stop ‘shoulding’ and shaming ourselves and instead create actionable changes in our lives.

i talk about:

• how i caught myself using a ‘should’ mentality

• self-shame + how it gets in the way of our goals

• the psychology behind why we experience shame

• DBT skills to use when we’re feeling shame

• taking accountability when we’re acting out of shame

• guilt vs. shame + why that difference matters

• forgiving ourselves for what’s causing us shame

• moving forward from ‘shoulding’ + shame

mentioned:

• DBT handout on shame