An Ounce of Ass Heroin, the Dopey Garbage Can Meditation & Heart Attack Doug Comments | Tuesday Patreon Teaser

Listen to The Big Episode at www.patreon.com/dopeypodcast

This week on the free Dopey Tuesday teaser, Dave wakes up at 5:41 in the morning feeling restless, spiritually shaky, and completely lost without meaningful Knicks news. After discussing the Allman Brothers, boring NBA rumors, Lena Dunham, and the dangers of listening to books by people he can’t get on Dopey, Dave attempts a brand-new guided meditation.

 

In the first-ever Dopey garbage can meditation, we gather up our regret, inadequacy, self-hatred, financial anxiety, childhood bullshit, belly fat, and fear about the future. We throw it all into a dumpster, strap the dumpster to a rocket ship, and launch the entire fucking thing into the sun.

 

Then Lauren B. delivers an instant-classic “socks for stories” voicemail. During the early days of COVID, when she and her boyfriend were so broke they were smoking cigarettes off the ground, Lauren spotted what she thought was a receipt beside a puddle. Instead, she found an entire ounce of real heroin in a ripped plastic bag that appeared to have been hidden inside somebody’s ass. The heroin kept them from hustling for several days—but after it ran out, Lauren bought something different and suffered her first overdose.

 

Dave also reads the Spotify and Patreon comments from Heart Attack Doug’s birthday episode. The Nation debates whether Doug needs to reveal more of his recovery story, whether his defensive shtick is wearing thin, and why he may still be the perfect Dopey cohost. Plus: gluten-free chicken parmesan, Billy Joe Shaver, James Brown, decriminalization, grief, relapse, losing beloved dogs, and finding a way back when life wears you down.

The episode closes with a heartfelt and imperfect cover of “Good So Bad,” a song that helped inspire a Dopey listener to get clean.

The full Reddit Roundup with the great Cormac and difficult Selby is available exclusively on Patreon.

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