E229: Ask A Sex Therapist: Swallowing, Fetishes, + Exes

Every week on Instagram, we host “Ask Us Anything” sessions. And honestly? We get way more questions than we could ever answer in stories. So today, we’re bringing some of those unanswered Qs straight to the podcast to give you deeper answers, real stories, and the honest, judgment-free advice you’ve been waiting for. Get ready, because we’re tackling some of your biggest, wildest curiosities about sex, intimacy, and relationships. 💛 Here’s what we’re getting into: Why some guys are so into swallowing (and what it really means). When “lasting too long” in bed becomes its own problem. How to tell your new partner about things you liked with an ex. What to do when you can’t seem to drop a fetish. Healing steps for survivors of sexual trauma who want a healthy sex life. What happens when you both want the other person to initiate. And that’s just the beginning — this episode is packed with your real questions and our no-BS answers. 🔗 Links & Resources Ready to uncover your unique intimacy blueprint? Take our free Intimacy Quiz and learn the key that drives your connection: 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/5keys Treat your partner to the best foreplay they’ve ever had 👉🏻The Ultimate Foreplay Guides http://vmtherapy.com/foreplay Learn how to initiate with confidence 👉🏻The Art of Initiation https://vmtherapy.com/initiation Unlock expert tools, our core course library, and more inside our membership 👉🏻 Deeper https://vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ **https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander** 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and plenty of flirty fun. Sign up here 👉 https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods. Timestamps  00:00 – Intro 03:00 – Why are guys so into swallowing? 11:04 – My partner lasts too long in bed 22:47 – How do I bring up things an ex used to do to me with my partner? 30:54 – Scheduling sex feels awkward—how do I get over that? 39:52 – How to get over a fetish 47:30 – How to reassure your partner with ED 56:19 – How SA survivors can have a great sex life 58:31 – What to do if we both want the other partner to initiate ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Audible Romance. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial ➡︎https://Audible.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cure. Use code PILLOW for 20% off your first order ➡︎http://curehydration.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Use code PILLOWTALKS for up to 20% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!. ➡︎https://cozyearth.com 👏Thanks OneSkin. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code PILLOW ➡︎https://oneskin.co/HAIR Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices