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Did you go with Rubberdub Dub?
Thanks for the grub.
Yeah, God, let's eat.
No.
That feels like a Ludwig.
But he did, like, Dear God, which is not what.
Oh, sorry.
Dear God.
Heavenly Father.
Heavenly Father.
There's a very certain, like, way you have to open and end.
Do you ever call him Heavenly Daddy?
No.
You're so fucking American with the Yeti.
Hold on, hold on.
The soda in the Yeti in the Miller High Life, with the Miller High Life hat, you are like.
If you don't live and do a proper intro, he's gonna kill him.
He's gonna kill him.
He's gonna kill him.
There's one thing he cares about.
You're like a Midwestern mom.
Yeah.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode.
Your favorite family is back.
The fear and podcast.
Loki, I hope we're not their favorite family.
I hope their family is their favorite family.
I feel like we have a tremendous amount of dysfunction, and a lot of people in America
have family dysfunction.
And this is like, yeah, but their favorite should still be their family.
Well, no, but some people, some people think that we're...
No, make the argument.
Why should we be their favorite?
Because we're better than their family.
I'll take it.
I'm just gonna say it.
Wow.
I think family dynamic gay dad does never around.
Hey, I'm always around.
He's always around.
Disfunctional mom.
No, I'm a gay dad.
I don't think I'm the mom.
Sex icon.
You don't think you're the mom.
I think I'm the aunt.
Okay.
Okay.
Mom is the mom.
I'm the mom.
Yeah.
His mom isn't an international terrorist.
Are you saying you're an international terrorist?
You have upgraded.
I thought you were just a local terrorist, personally.
Domestic.
Domestic.
Oh, okay.
Well, ladies and gentlemen, the family is back.
That's right.
And we have been having such a fabulous week.
I, in particular, have been having a fabulous week
because I decided to move from Hassan's house to Will's.
It's correct.
Fun.
I've been staying at Will's the last two nights.
It's correct.
And it's been a fabulous experience.
It's been a great experience.
Oh, boy.
Now Hassan's gonna fight for you.
No.
You're not.
Not even a little bit.
You usually get phoemal though.
Yeah.
I was surprised by the amount of night terrors, Austin.
You don't know about him.
I did.
I'm learning for the first time.
We've just been hearing him scream in the night.
Oh, wait.
What?
Yeah, you just randomly.
Christian, I told you.
No, he was.
I don't think you also found out you snore for the first time.
Yes, you didn't know you snored.
No, I found out for the first time ever.
And it was devastating.
Wait, that's so scary, Austin.
No, because no,
sleep apnea.
I know I've heard about this.
And I was thinking about getting a sleep test.
Yes.
I've actually been thinking about why you snore.
Why is that?
Well, have you seen all the data about frequent flyer
flying, destroying your sleep?
Don't say that.
And that's his only thing he loves.
That's like telling me that like,
Noah Khan makes me want to kill myself.
Yeah, there's a lot of new evidence that's come out
that it like ages your face terribly,
because it's so dry.
He's being evil.
I'm not.
Don't listen to him.
There's data.
That's true is the radiation.
My uncle did fly every day and he died.
That's true.
Oh, it's flight radiation.
Flight related radiation poisoning will
and it drives your skin,
debilitating effect.
It also destroys your circadian rhythm.
But he's fine.
I don't think he's fine.
I think he's snoring.
It's like the first step to having aging skin.
Radiation exposure from 20 years of,
well, what is that?
It's really.
I just give 225 different cancers after 20 years.
After I've been flying for at least 10 consistently.
You got another five in you.
What do you fly?
I think he flies more than eight.
Yeah, you got another 10 in you.
No, you fly the same as a pilot.
They always fly.
My, my, my uncle died in his 50s.
Of what?
Remember, you were there.
I was at, I wasn't there when he did.
No, well, I was there.
Yeah, you were there.
Oh, when you got the call.
Yeah, that was lucky.
We were there.
Yeah, we were there.
And by the way, I don't worry about the bill.
I took care of it.
No.
I just want to.
I think I offered to pay.
No, but we took care of it.
I just want to let you know the straw.
That that
I did offer to pay.
No, no, you didn't, and I just want to.
Oh, my God, I feel bad.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, that bird.
I'm so sorry release from you.
I just I want to let you know.
I'll pay you.
How much is it?
No, I know it was like 150 bucks.
No, don't worry.
No, no, please, don't, please don't pay.
No, seriously, don't worry.
Every time you're a family member's dies,
you get one free dinner.
Yeah, of course.
Okay, yeah, you got a punch card like a subway. Oh, you get 10 you get the last one free, but do I get post like do I get does it start now or do I get post I mean start it now
Yeah
She has such a bro. She has such a big family. I do have such a big family like 40
Mormons. Yeah, it's dinner for a day. Well, they're all Mormons. So they're like fine. They live forever. They live forever. They don't drink.
They don't smoke. Yeah, they meditate every day.
You still have that pimple patch on. I got still hoping against hope. Yeah, I do.
You know, I was I was with my family and they, you know, we have to say prayer before dinner. And for
summaries and my sister and I picked a Ludwig to say prayer. Oh, how did that go? She thought it was funny and but I feel like a funny
prayer is not really very kosher. Yes, it's usually not. So I was surprised by it. And if you don't know, if you go with
Rubbidub Dub, thanks for the grub. Yeah, God, let's eat. No, that feels like a Ludwig, but he did like dear God, which is not what
That's our. Yeah, there's a very certain like way you have to open an end. Do you ever call him heavenly daddy?
You know, I've got a whole new take on religion. Okay. A whole new perspective on religion. Would you? Okay, Martin Luther. What's all me in? Give us the whole
whole thing. I think everybody's got religion wrong. Okay. Jesus died on the cross nailed to it. Viciously. Right. Blood. Everything. The whole
Shabbat. Yeah. Glory. I'm nervous. He's watching right now. Well, he's not going to forgive that. I mean, that was
gave his help. No, he knows, but I think he agreed to say not a Christian thing. This is more novel. No, yeah, he's
just getting the horns. Let me, let me talk. Let me just see you know, is that right? Are you doing it right? Of course.
No, you make a cross. Father Son, Holy Spirit. Yeah, you're out there. Anyway, regardless. All right. I believe that we got
all wrong. Jesus died of horrific death. He suffered a lot, right? So that we could fucking have a good
time. Yeah, he suffered first sense. Yes, exactly. So what the fuck are we all stressed about? You know, that's
what I mean, from that perspective, the prospect of eternal damnation.
Damnation, shmammation. He died for us. He died for us. I know deep down your terrified of hell. No, no, yes, of course. Yeah.
But just like that, a new schism has opened. No, no, here's the deal. Like this is what says this is what kills me.
I've heard it again. Okay, Catholic. Oh, and I can say I have the past because I'm Catholic. No, you're not. Well, with that
used to be. I'm saying, no, after you're blessed for me. Well, anyway, I'm sure I'll just go to
confessional. I still have a cold. So Catholics do this thing called Lent. Yeah. And I just don't
understand. Jesus gave up so much, right? It's like a cheap thing. It's like, so Jesus dies on the
cross, goes through the desert for whatever days and we're giving up carbs. And that's our like,
it's just like just fucking don't do anything at that point. You know what I'm saying? Right.
That was my effort. Good. I like that. I like that. You're being a contrarian. I like that. Thank you so
much. I'm doing my best. You know, but sometimes it's important for us not to give in to things. You're
a modern. Yeah. Thank you. I have the funniest update. And I don't know if you guys are into this at
all. I'm into it. It's kind of a pseudo-girly population. Okay. Okay. I'm ready. You guys, I told you
unless it's you back to New York Jets again. No, I became weirdly protective of the New York Jets.
That's great. You've got it. Ever since that one boy said he wanted to kill himself because he
was a fan of them. I liked that energy. We got it. We got bushes. Yeah. I identify with the
suicidal ideation of a fandom. That's awesome. Okay. You guys, I told you about like the
Try Guys cheating scandal forever. I have so many updates. This is like it's been a weird
week. We don't know. Okay. So the try guys were were four guys. Okay. In case you don't remember
here. So, you know, I think we covered this two days ago. Yeah. You're co-workers. Yeah. Yeah.
I bosses. Yeah. And I I've filled with them with will. Yeah. That's so funny. I used to love,
like, like when people talk about being into YouTube, I was never into YouTube growing up. Like,
all the only time I looked forward to uploads was the Try Guys. Isn't that funny? Now you know,
it's the Mormons. Yeah. It was. It was the Mormons. I can tell you three of them are very nice people.
Yeah. I'm scared. Three. Well, I was, you know, maybe you can be you can cheat on your wife and
be nice. Who knows? I don't know. But so there's four guys. So there's Eugene. He is incredible.
And hopefully yeah, he's the hot like gay one. He's he's a fucking icon. He's incredible.
Keith. He's like the funny one. He's the goofy tall. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Um, Ned and Ned. He's the
wife guy obsessed with his wife. Okay. Formerly was. Yeah. Okay. And then Zach. He lost his thing.
Okay. Yeah. He did lose his thing. Zach. You're just the guy. Yeah. Okay. Zach was also the
funny guy. But like that's funny. Funny guy. He's goofy. Oh, okay. I like that. Okay. Okay.
So they would do content where they would try things. Yeah. And essentially whenever Ned could,
he'd bring up his god damn wife. Like to the point that I was like annoying, like we're making cakes
as a challenge. And he'd be like, I made my wife's favorite strawberry cake. And he was like,
shut up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Obsessed with his wife. Okay. They have a kid. They even do a cookbook,
which is funny because like they don't know how to fucking cook. Anyway, I hate when people do cookbooks.
They don't have five. I feel like you're getting a little bit cooking. That's why I make a cookbook
is to allow other people cook. But if you don't know, I can cook one because I'm tired. What?
It's on my list. It's been on my list. He's cookbook sounds great. But what if what if I just
want to make what we're called Austin shows my shitty little cookbook. Yeah. It's just a shit.
It's a bottom frame. That was a shitty little cookbook. Yeah. And it's a bottom frame.
It's just five. It's fucking rice. Yeah. It's just a two conversion one page.
But it's as rice. Not too much though. Because then it's not too much five.
No, but you just have to eat fiber consistently so that you get it blow it out.
I do. I'm a professional. I'm sorry. We don't. As long as your cookbook is true to you,
you can have a cookbook. Okay. You guys, you know, like you could make one of sandwiches with chips
on it and like, it was true to his wife. Maybe it was. Maybe I just didn't know
was wife enough. Maybe it was. Maybe I'm being hated. As someone who knows his wife,
she was fabulous. And she can cook. She's the nicest here, man. Okay. So who cheated on her?
Okay. So, he cheated. Ned, the wife guy cheats on her. Oh god. Okay. And what way?
How did he, like, how did he cheat on her? I think sexually. Yeah. Sexually and publicly.
He got, okay. Do you want me to fill this blank? Yeah. That's fine. He got caught in kind of like
a compromised position with his producer missionary or no, like grinding at a nightclub. Yes.
With his producer at a nightclub, which was a double niche niche because he was cheating. But also,
he was that person superior. Oh, my gosh. Yeah. Which was it. It was a double niche. Which is why
we keep telling you you can't be with Marsh. Yeah. I've been trying to fuck Marsh for the entire
time. Now that I know who's topping who? Reverse. That's another version. Okay. Anyway.
All right. Okay. Anyway. So, yeah. So publicly and they have to address it. They kick net off
the try guys. Eugene's mad because Eugene was going to leave the try guys. It's also a little bit
better for Randy though because like try guys. And it's like try three. You know what I mean? I
feel like he tried cheating on his wife. They didn't give him credit for that. Do that would have
been awesome if they went right into a video. They should have. Yeah. We tried cheating. And then
all three of them. The other three are like, can't do it. Can't do it. Can't do it. He's like, look.
I'll do it. I'm gay. Yeah. What? Can I just say something? Yeah. If you're going to cheat,
don't cheat. Okay. Why the fuck are all these people cheating in public? I don't know. I think
the thrill of it. I guess, but like Jesus Christ, you're famous. What do you deal with?
What do you deal with? What do you deal with? What do you deal with? What do you deal with?
Like don't cheat. First of all, don't cheat. I've noticed something. Austin always gives advice
to cheaters on how to better cheat. Whatever cheating comes up, he's like, guys, hypothetically
awesome. I'm gonna say don't cheat. But like, look, I'm not a cheat. I never know. Don't cheat.
Don't do it. Right. However. Don't do it in a Google Doc. Yeah.
Don't do it in public. Like, come the fuck on the fact. Yeah. Fucking speaking and out of hotel rooms.
All right. You understand? Okay. So why is that home for the weekend? Why are you giving advice
to people on how to cheat? I'm just saying there's a very clear blueprint on how to cheat,
and that's not it. And I'm saying don't fucking do it. All his icons from the 50s. Now,
Frank Sinatra. That's a guy who could fuck around his wife. I'm just saying there. If you
wanted to murder somebody, why do they call them the rat pad? Like, if you wanted to kill somebody,
cutie, I'd probably be like, cutie, don't do it in public. Well, yeah. But the thing is,
as murder as a legal and cheating isn't. That's the advice. Yeah.
I'm pretty Cinderella. I'm pretty Cinderella approaches. It says Austin. I need to assassinate
someone. I say, cutie, I say, cutie, if you're gonna do it, and I can't stop you, just don't get,
just don't do it in public. I'm the Uber murderer. I told you guys how I'm doing.
Exactly. See there you go. That's clever. It's not. Why? Because it's so traceable.
Yeah, but they don't know which they don't know. They don't know. Cutie, be the Uber murderer.
I'm the, let me be it. The Uber eats murder. I'm the Uber eats murder. They say,
oh, did she eat them up again? And I'm watching the news and I'm like, that was me. That was me.
That was me. Yep. That's it. Okay. Anyway, so he cheats on his wife. Don't cheat on your wife.
Okay. And then, but if you're gonna do it, the try guys kick him off. They kick him off the
trying. They say, no more trying for you. And then Eugene leaves anyway. And then, respectfully,
anyway, love Keith and Zach, though, they did their best with what they could. So then
it, it's very, very public. Everyone's mad because he's the wife guy. If he wasn't the wife guy,
I don't know if we'd care that much. People cheat all the time and we're just like bastard.
But like, he's the wife guy. Like, get like projection 101, you know? So then they have to do
like a public statement about him leaving. He leaves. He goes silent off social media forever
until he came back like a few months ago with a podcast called the cheater rock bottom.
Oh, yeah. Oh my god. I'm the sound you make while water is drip, drip, dripping down your
booty cheeks. Wow. Yes, that's right. I tell you what, Hassan, I have been using my new Tushy.
Damn. But day. And I love it because it brings luxurious comfort. I'm gonna be honest. I can
talk for hours about how much I love using my bad day. Real. Growing up in Turkey, there's a
bad day in every bathroom coming to America. No bad days. Unless you get a Tushy bad day.
Right. And you actually wipe that clean. The comment Turkey today. No, but seriously, I don't
understand why people in the Western world still haven't gotten on the bidet. Dirty butts.
Zora Mumbani is the mayor of New York City. We've actually had a conversation about
this. We're putting up a day in every single toilet. And you can get one and feel like you're in
Mumbani stand really. That's right. Now, let me tell you something else. Tushy doesn't just
have a day. They got prebiotics and probiotics so that you can throw that into your regimen to
make sure that your movements are nice and pristine. That's amazing. It doesn't even work as hard.
So ladies and gentlemen, make going to the bathroom. The most comfortable thing you do all day.
For limited time or listeners, get 10% off the first bidet order. When they use code fear,
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Oh, you haven't heard about this. Yeah. In the first episode is with his ex life. I'm not.
I'm not going to lie. This is a it's a hard watch. It's a good watch. It's a hard watch.
I need to see you guys. She reads him to filth. Yeah. And he just sits there and it got 1.3 million.
Yeah, that's right. He did it. Oh my god. Oh, no. Come on. Pull it up. No, we can't watch the whole
episode. No, I want to see like this and pieces. Oh, no. Oh, you just put it. Yeah,
my foot was asleep. So oh my god. God. God. Yeah. Ned. All right. I get to a like a highlighted
moment. Is there? Yeah, where's the, oh, it doesn't have the bar graph. That's funny.
Or the yeah, we're together. We're going to the same place. And so we get in the car and we were
driving there. And there's my, you know, refreshing place to be. It's so great.
What? I've been, I've been hurting this person that I love this whole time.
You didn't realize until then. Well, you know, but then there's other things you tell yourself to kind of
sort of compartments. Okay. Hold on. First of all, you know what? You're cheating in public.
Austin, I'm gonna be honest. I feel like that's how you would respond. Stop. No. You think that's
all right? You know, he would try guys cheating episode. I would never cheat. I would never cheat.
Christian, I would never cheat on you in public. In public.
Austin, you're kind of in a relationship where that would be hard to cheat. Yeah.
In my defense, it would be very difficult to cheat in my relationship. Considering
there's not, you know what I mean? It'd be weird to be very strange. You'd have to try hard. Yeah,
very much. Try hard. Right. But anyway, you know, you'd have to try guys. First of all,
I want to make statement here. What a piece of shit for doing. Wow. Wow. Okay. Five months late.
But no, it's not even five months late. I don't want people to misconstrued the fact that I'm
telling him he was a bad cheater. Like all cheaters are bad. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah.
You're a shitty person regardless. I'm just saying you're bad at it. There's bad murderers,
right? There's bad serial killers. You know what I mean? They're all bad, right? I'm taking
myself into a whole. You know what I mean? They're all bad, right? Just like, you know, I don't know.
Martha Stewart cheated on her husband and she's an icon. So I don't care because when women
cheat, it's cool. Okay. So that was that, right? That's last we really heard of Ned. Until recently,
this guy found a Snapchat memory. Um, he found a Snapchat memory and posted it on TikTok and it
got like seven million views and it's Ned cheating with a different woman. No. Yeah. A different
fucking woman. And the problem with this is it was at a club. I don't know why the try guys are
clubbing so much. Like is my first question? Like, and also they're not really like a club.
Not to put an Austin, but like, why is he always cheating at the club? Yeah. It's so weird. Now
finally, somebody gets it. Cheat in a hotel room. At that point, you're like begging to be caught,
right? Yeah. So, so like someone records on their Snapchat, she's like snuggling on him, right?
And the problem is is in the background, you can see the other try guys far away in the club.
And so people are mad at the other try guys being like, they knew, they knew, they knew.
And then Keith had to post something and was like, we didn't know. Yes, we were far away. Like,
we did not know he was grinding on some girl. You know, so and I believe him. So whatever.
But as a part of this resurgence, Ned, Ned Fulmer's, um, Bell Deco is dating profile got hacked.
And if you don't, I feel bad about this though, because it is like a level of doxing.
But the way that Ned handled it, I think is what is crazy. Because then the reason that we are
allowed to talk about it is in an attempt to reclaim his agency after his dating profile had been
leaked. Keith's self posted and critiqued all of the photos on his dating portfolio are profile
and well, to mixed reviews, I would say. Yeah. I think I'm going to take a controversial
on this. Ned is a very strong man, a much stronger man than I, because I would have killed myself
at the point. That's crazy. Um, so he said apparently somebody docs my Feldco profile saves me
at $30 a month. I truly give zero fucks and invite you to roast it, especially baby,
BB Rex, uh, and then he linked, uh, photographs. So I guess, you know, here's the first one.
A further record. Feldco, this is for the curious. So often, like, Dom is looking for subs or, um,
subbies looking for, yes, Dom leading switch looking for a breadie sub. Um, oh,
yeah, oh, he put the NFG. Ah, oh, and then if he's, if he's grown up, it's interesting,
because he gives context on the photos that we didn't need. Um, is he gay? No. Oh, um,
can you zoom in? I can't read. He said like the dog bio could be better, he says, I'm single
live alone in a gorgeous home in silver. Like maybe you'll be lucky enough to see it someday,
winky face. Oh, no. Um, yeah, I see that. I'm like, I'm trying to fuck this guy. It says,
it says nice fit mask. It's fun. Great view was a photo shoot with Ariel for our dating profiles
at a school fundraiser, but nobody needs to know that, which is really weird because Ariel's is
X, um, love this one. I tried kite surfing in Greece this summer. Little goofy shows something
extreme. He, he gives it a six out of 10. Um, Hulk costume Halloween, 2022, when I was in
treatment stress anxiety depression had my weight down to 155, which is way too low. 170 is better,
but my abs looked defined and I'm painted green. Not the four hour four year old picture. Yeah,
hot tub mountain man. I don't know, probably should lead this one, but the sun set was nice.
Not the Austin Powers chest here. Yeah. Girl, baby, very good. Um, this one's nuts and way too
cost me from the air's tour, but the beard was strong and whatever. I'm a single dad on a dating
app out here, my life 24. Wedding ring. He's wearing a wedding ring. Um, but hey, he had kids.
It's felt cold. Half the people are poly. Tell me that. Follow me. She got more divorce,
that unhinge measure, whatever. I don't care. Hope this gave you a laugh. I want to know who
the Ned writers are, like right now. Can we look at the replies a little bit? Like, is there
anyone? No, I don't think there's anyone nice. Keep going. Ned, like, who are the people that
like the post that were like, no, you, Hassan, you have to understand. Ned is not sufficiently
right wing enough to have that type of audience. True. Oh my god. You're so right. Why didn't he pivot?
Yeah. If he would, if he would be in a right winger and he would have pivoted and gripped
into the right, he would have a fucking huge opportunity to do. They're so stupid. Yeah, they love,
they love cheating men. So long as it's at the expense of women Republicans will go, that's true.
How did this make you? How do you want to? I don't know. He just, he posted, there's a power
and not giving a fuck. Do I wish my kinky dating profile had not been leaked? Yes, of course.
Given it was, am I grateful I can now just be myself? Yes, absolutely.
Wasn't he just being himself anyway before the profile leaked though? So it kind of feels like
he is giving a fuck? Well, look, I think at this point, this guy is just, it's too far gone.
He clearly has no idea how to manage a crisis. What would you do in that situation? He just,
first of all, you don't fucking cheat to begin with. And if you're going to be like,
do it in private. I think you're supposed to do it in public. First of all, this is what you do.
You go to your wife and you say, wife, can I cheat? No, you don't answer for permission.
You just say, look, if you're going to cheat in the marriage, if that, if you're not happy,
you know, you say can we spice things up? And if she says no, say, uh, cheating is never the answer.
Communication is key. All right. Don't cheat at all. Right. And by the way, I just want to make
everybody clear, I am firmly against cheating. Right. Firmly for here at the Furion podcast,
I and my fellow co-hosts are firmly against cheating. And we do not take our advice to those who
cheat poorly as a, as a, as a, what? We don't take our advice to cheat. We told them not to cheat.
Don't cheat. But I'm just saying, don't do it. But like, how fucking stupid to do it?
Especially in public. Yeah. Right. Especially in public. Right. Yeah. So I guess, I mean,
I guess my, my takeaways. How would you handle your kinky subdomi mommy looking for a bratty sub
dating profile? Be leaked. Yeah. Pivot right wing. Pivot to the right. You pivot right wing.
Okay. That's how I do it, dude. Yeah. I pivot to the right. Good to know because the right wing
is that's, that's what they do. They cheat on their wives and then they, personally, I would get
a job in like finance or something. I would, yeah, I'd probably become a commercial airline pilot.
Yeah. I'm like, that, that is my shock here is like, I fear that sometimes some people don't
know when to walk away from like content creation. Not everyone needs to be a content creator.
Real. And I think sometimes when you, like, you got to cut your losses, especially when
it gets to this level, or even just cut your losses longer. Like, I know it's been a few years
since he cheated, but like, he came back like two years later. Yeah. And it's kind of like,
brother, like, you need to like, he's a smart guy. He's an Ivy League educated. Yeah. He's a
very smart. Oh, I think we're measuring smart enough to cheat in private, though. I think we're
measuring intelligence off of one category. I think there's levels of intelligence. Usually a pretty
good indicator. Yeah, me too. I think so. Okay. Clearly fucking, clearly fucking not. Yeah,
did you get in there? Ivy League? No, I didn't, but I would have handled that a lot better.
I wouldn't have cheated. There you go. Boom. Turns out you are in like an open relation.
I'm not in an open relationship. He's in a communicative open. No, no, I'm not in
an open relationship. He's in an option. What was the last thing we talked about before we turn
on the camera? It's not open. It's not open. It's not open. It's not open. It's not open.
The very last topic. You have to give permission. Open when meaning. You can be with anyone,
right? Fuck one guest if he came on the podcast. Oh, okay. We're trying to get Harry Styles.
First of all, Harry Styles, if you see this, this is a straight man, and I would never have
said I was gonna get a mention who I was. Harry Styles, if you want to come on the podcast,
if I had to get Harry Styles on the podcast, I'd sleep with it. If we all have to do something
for Harry Styles, if you want to come on the podcast, Harry Styles, and I know you really
want to do you have to fuck off. No, that is not the barrier to Harry Styles. It'd be a requirement.
I'm open to it. Right? That's what I'm trying to say. That's not women are. No, you can get it.
Awesome. But for the record, I keep my relationship very private, and it's not open. Okay, it's not
open. So for those of you who are trying to sleep with me, unless your Harry Styles will consider it.
Not allowed. Not allowed. Yeah, right? You follow me on Instagram, Harry Styles. I'm not looking
for a brand new shirt. Quit eating the goddamn popcorn. Cutie. Cinderella, like the princess.
No more popcorn for you. Instagram. You've eaten enough today. That's really mean. Well,
actually, hold on. Yeah, that's not nice. Hold on, Caleb. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm telling Caleb
that you're fashaming me. No, I'm not fashaming you at all. You're not fat. You look great.
I thought, Caleb, I hope you see this. You look fantastic. You look fantastic.
Who else has it? They'd like to talk. We haven't bombed her on yet. Okay.
Which is good. Right. And yeah, I don't want to bomb any. I don't want to buy my ran.
I don't think this is how it works. I think it should. I think if American Idol, we could vote
from our phones. I think we should be able to do that about bombings. Oh my god. I think we would
bomb every time. Oh, Americans like that. Americans, Americans like just just for the thrill of it.
I mean, I'm not a good American. You know, it's like they say, and I ran. I ran so far away.
Wow, that was beautiful. What the hell are you talking about? Couldn't get away. Oh,
this is song. That's right. That's right. Well, um, listen to music.
Next week, Will and I are hosting the Glad Awards. Yeah. That's so exciting. That's right.
We're interviewing Gays and uh, speaking of Gays, the cast of heated robbery will be there.
And Austin got a fan. Yeah, we're going to ask him to be on. Yes. Can you ask them for like
anything at all? Like a lock of hair? I'm trying. I don't know. Ask them for a lock of hair.
Well, you guys think I am the Taylor Swift. I am too. Um, yeah. I'm like obsessed with that.
Have you seen it? Yes. I saw it. I've consumed. What did you think of the sex scenes?
Wait. Oh my god. Are you a yowee girl?
Yowee? What does that mean? Right? Fajoshi, right? What is yowee? Yowee? Are you into boy love?
Oh, you like boy. I'm just into love. Oh, she's a yowee. Oh my god. Love story. We just got
fucking woked. Oh my god. I'm woke. I did it. Take that. The term is Fajoshi, I think.
I don't see. Okay. You just like love. I just like love. I mean, it's so good.
You watched the last episode of your freaking kick in your feet. Right. Did you watch it?
No. Oh my god. This is me. I did. Wow. Oh, dude. Let's just go. Oh my god. I think I'm sick.
Oh my god. Well, we need to get you to the doctor. We got to go to the doctor.
Well, what are you doing? What are you doing? Well, he's got an open mouth. No, we got to go to the doctor.
It's an ancient disease. Oh my god. I will. No. Quit attacking us. You need to go see a doctor.
But I can't. I live in the United States. I know. We can help you find a doctor that's in
network. Hold it down. Help me. Help me. Help me. Help me. I'm telling you, Doc. We're
so dark. We're so dark. We're so dark. We're so dark. We're so dark. We're so dark. We're so dark.
Doc, Doc, Doc, Conflation Fear. Let's try to find an instantly book and top-rated doctorated
at the L.C. The L.C. Doc, Doc, Conflation Fear. This is sponsored by Doc.
Oh my goodness. That's that's you in your episode. Yeah. That's me episode six. Wow. And it was
did you so that I would take it. You enjoyed it. I had a bad take the first two episodes.
Because I don't like I don't like like heavy sex. I don't give a fuck for Bridgerton's sex scenes.
I watched Bridgerton because nothing else is on. Number one. And number two, I like the design.
Like I love the outfits and I love the. Victoria. Pretty. Yeah. And the lilacs outside
on the house. So pretty. Anyway. So that's why I watched Bridgerton. I think the sex is lame.
And so season or episode one and two, it is. It's like bad.
I'm just funny. You're like sex is lame in general. Well, no, if I'm going to watch like sex scenes,
I'm going to fucking, you know, I'm going to watch like I think sex. I don't know what I'm going to watch.
That statement. Yeah. I think what would you watch if you try to watch sex?
I know what you mean. I call it the filter. I think the real, the reason why the first two
episodes is heavy on the sex is so that they just like kind of get you ready for, you know,
sex happening later down sporadically in the, in the different episodes. But like the first two
episodes are very, my dad loves hockey. So I was like, let's watch this together. And I didn't.
It's just kidding. I started watching it with my dad. Yes, it's almost sex you out.
It's not, there's not as much hockey as you would think. No, no, based on everyone talking about it.
No, no. They're playing with different things, you know. So my, my first take was it was just like,
you like that's a fucking idiot. My first take was episode one and two was like, it was just not
enough. I didn't feel connected yet. Because they also, they, if you watch it, they did like jumps.
It was like all of a sudden a year later and then a year later. And I'm like, where are we?
Yeah, right. I was, I couldn't understand. But then you get an episode three and then you meet
the guy, the other guy and then he said, and then he comes out public. And then he's just being
himself. And then the other guy's always himself. And then he's like, so, and he goes to his dad.
And he tries. And oh, my God, he's so good. He didn't watch it because he thought the gay sex was
too. What was the term you use? Go, go, should I even know what that word means? Wait, what?
I don't know. Was it like boring? I love go should be tacky. Yeah. Oh, no, I don't, I don't.
Taylor Swift's song. You keep quoting Taylor Swift lately. Do you know that?
We really use that clandestine last week. And she owns all words.
That's clandestine operator. That's the Candace Owens. I call myself a clandestine operator
as a fan of, of Candace Owens. So I thought you were quoting Taylor Swift's song. So
clandestine meeting. So listen, first of all, her son has tried to spread this rumor about me
that I was fucking with him because I said the gay sex is too. You're so embarrassed about your
take it by heated rivalry. You're worried you're going to get excommunicated by the gay. So wait,
what kind of sex did you want? No, no, I'm fine with the sex in the, in the scene.
Oh, in fact, I thought it could be, I thought there could have been more nudity. Oh, okay,
how? Oh, I do. We did not really, we always saw one penis. Oh, I think we need to release more
penises into the media. Yeah. I don't know why we're, was the penis flaccid? No,
hard. And it was a tag. It was just a text, though. Oh, I do, I do believe that like we
need to, we need to free the penis and vaginas in media. I don't think why are we hiding them?
We all have them because there's one point where the boys are in the shower and one of them's
like jerking off to the other one. Oh, my goodness. And this is when they're just like flirting.
And he like turns and he's like stroking it. And then you don't get to see the penis. And I was
like, I was kind of curious. Anybody else? I mean, yeah, I think you were curious. You wanted
to see it. I, of course, I did. Austin didn't watch the show because he thought the gay sex was too
too. No, no, no, no, no. You have to get to episode six. Yeah, I, I mean, I, how long has
it been since we got this conversation? You've yet to watch. I understand. I am busy. You
have to, I understand your take from one and two, but once you get to episode six. No,
couldn't make it to episode three. You got to go to the corner. I will tell you this.
By next episode, I will have watched all of heated right. Okay, because I finally have a
weekend to myself. And you have to go out of words. Yes. And I'm going to be at the
glad awards. And we're going to have chat announcement here. Jinks monsoon is on the podcast next week.
Yes. So after this episode, we are, we are, we have Jinks monsoon. After this episode,
it should be on the pod next week. And we're going to have her on. And then she and I will,
and we'll all be going to the glad awards. And Austin got a fantastic out for the glad awards.
Oh, yes. Do you have a picture? Well, I don't really have a, maybe I do. I'll, I'll look at
it. Let me look for it. But I went into Gucci. All right. Here is what my outfit looks like.
I'm scared to look at you free scrolling. I'm going to, I'm going to send it to you. But I don't
really have like a good picture of me. You have to give me in the outfit. So I'm going to just
send you one without my face in it. Okay. Okay. Let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me save
the photos. Oh my god. I look at Austin. I have another question for you about the glad awards.
Yes. Go ahead. Is it true that you told the glad awards that I could not attend the glad awards?
Yes. I did. That's awesome. I, I told the glad awards. I said, Hassan Piker,
is not allowed at the glad awards because I cannot allow him to steal my thunder.
You would steal his thunder. You did what? I said, Hassan was still his thunder. That event
is for will. This is safe space. And I cannot allow. What's the glad awards? Oh,
no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not telling you the time. You're not allowed. Wait, can I go? Yeah,
you could go. Wait, so I'm not a threat. No, it's not that you guys are making about me. No,
I know. It's not about, it's not that you guys are a threat, aren't a threat, okay? It's just,
you guys, he doesn't know how to elevate me like you. I could elevate you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. It's, it's being filmed on Wednesday. You're a succubus. No, yeah. Thursday. That was our
problem. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. We've been having homestay. Thursday problems. You're not going,
you need a ticket and they're all sold out. I'm gonna. They're all gone, Hassan. I'm going to
the fucking glad. No, you are not. March and I are going to the glad. You are not. I guess you
could say it's become a heated rival. I don't want to see you guys in that movie. I'm just letting
you know, okay, that I will, I am refusing to interview you on the red carpet. No, you will,
you will get no press for me. I'll get, I'll get interview. Well, you know what,
March, maybe we can, maybe we can rip our lives. You're on our own. Okay. March,
and it's not tailored yet. The app, it's not tailored yet. She have to give me, you know,
you have to give me some. I'm going to go ahead and ask the glad awards if I can do a red carpet.
Maybe we'll have one of your dastard. Okay. So here's the out. You have to give me a listen.
Listen. Don't do that. It's brown. I'm yours. Easy. Easy. Okay. Um, look, you have to give me
some grace here because it's not tailored. Uh-huh. It looks beautiful. Wait, I'm confused.
Is there no jacket? No, I'm going, I'm, I'm based, I'm having a custom silk tank top made
underneath it of the same color. Okay. I'm going to wear it. That helps me because I think
respectfully, that looks like I mean this respectfully. It's a little. Yeah, because it used to be
tailored. Well, no, like, have you seen like, you need like a eyes, leave them alone. Okay.
I spent five grand of that. It's okay. It's okay. I just feel like the glad awards is the one time
that you can be a little. Yeah. Now we have a budget for me. No, you guys are going to give them
a complex. No, it's good. Sorry. Austin, it looks fabulous. I think you should be
shirtless underneath. There's going to look so handsome. Look what you did. No, it's good. No,
it's good. No, no, we're a family. I need you to to take ownership. You traumatized our little
gay boy. You mean, you don't think I'm going to look good. You're going to look fabulous. Tell me
you're going to look fabulous. Thank you. And you look really good. Didn't seem convincing.
That one. Good. It's just, it's just, I just wanted, I want more from you. You want more? I
spent five grand. What else can I do? I'm like a matching top hat or something. I know. I know.
Something. What is he fucking really want? Where heels are something? Like do something a little
out of their butt. Actually, I fuck with the hills idea. Yeah, QT is right. The top. I'm working on you.
Okay, hold on. I'm going to call my stylist right now. No, no, he's calling my style. I don't know
if I try. He's got a panic. He's going to. No, no, no, no, no, no. I'm going to call him. This is a
disaster. I'm going to call my stylist. Just give me a second. This is how he cancels on the
gladiators and then I see Nick. You're on the fear and podcast. I've got a question. Hi. Hi.
Question. What if we added heels to the outfit? To your outfit? Yes.
The one you're going to wear to the gladiators? Yes. No. Okay. Okay. Thank you.
This time around, not this time around, but if you want to be in some cha cha heels, I'll put it
up. I'll put them on you next time. Okay. Nick, I have a question. Hi, my name is QT
Cinderella. It's not my real name. I was bored that way, but it's the second. It's a new.
It's a different one that I got later in life. But my question is, don't you think? Don't you
think? Well, we're like nice and respectfully, because I know you help him a lot. Don't you think
he's missing some pizzazz? Yes, but we have to be gentle with giving Austin some pizzazz.
If he overloaded him with too much pizzazz, he might combust. Yeah. Nick, this is well-napped.
We're all friends. I see the vision. I love the outfit. I am a full supporter of it. It's fabulous.
Thank you. You're a Gucci boy. Thank you. Okay. Thank you, Nick. Good job. Bye.
Bye. Okay. So you have a fear of pizzazz? I have no fear of pizzazz. Look at
a fucking Franky Broadway's ass. Kind of feels like Nick knows you best. You couldn't wear that
back. Look, and he made it seem like you were the set back here. He did. I never
get. Look, look at this. What you're doing to him. Can't believe it. Look what you're doing.
I'm never getting. I'm going to use the bathroom. I want you to leave. I want you to wear a suit
jacket. I mean, shirtless underneath. You work out too much to not be shirtless.
That's right. And we could do fake nipple piercings, and the nipple piercings are like a chain around
your neck. Wouldn't that be so cool? What are you doing a scene from the fucking cell?
I like it. I have a nipple piercing necklace. Okay. You pissed off Siri. Okay. Number one.
Calm down. You're overloading. But don't you think that would be crazy? You guys know,
you guys are becoming helicopter parents. Let our little gay son fly at his own speed.
I have no dog in this fight. I just like the fuck with Austin. I know. It's sick. You're a
bad older brother. I just, I just, I just, I just, that would be really cool. My outfit.
It's funny. He's imagine. He's like, he had to do a panic. Like,
jacket, no top fake nipple piercings into a chain. So cool. Anyway,
if anyone wants to hire me, be a little. I don't know. I think about
matching. Fetching. Fetching. Fake ones. Fake ones. Fake ones. I can make it.
You're going to look so good. I'm so excited for you. Thank you so much. Oh my god. But like,
imagine, even like an assless. I love it. I imagine assless. Okay, asses. Yes.
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I've got an idea. Okay. Well, I'm going to even have an idea. All right. I need to
I need to come. Well, I already have a little bit of a complex because some guy came up to me
and said, does the son make fun of you for how you dress? I'll kill him. Who is it? Oh, you.
And I was wearing this outfit that I'm wearing right now, but that's a great outfit. Yeah, but
and I think I don't know. He came up and I was like, well, and I just covered it and I was like,
I'm not insecure at all. Good thing. Good thing that you sit with you. Yeah, no, it didn't
sit with me at all. But yeah, I was just, you know, a little bit of a complex. So, you know,
look, I think I'm going to look great. I'm very confident. I think you're going to look
thank you. You're going to look great. What are you going to wear, Will? Oh, oh, no.
All right. Wow. You know what I think of? Who's Sue? I think of all the time.
Is Zesty Bestie from the Streamer Awards? Did you see it? Oh, no. Oh, my God. Gorgina.
Hand embroidered like because he goes by Zesty. Zesty Bestie. Blue suit. Hand embroidered like
lemon in fucking lemon zest. Oh my God. Incredible. I think about it all the time. Zesty
doesn't even know that, but if you knew. Oh,
ready with your Zesty. Oh, Zesty Bestie. So cute. Oh my God. Best suit ever. I think about it all
the time. Look at that. Oh, wow. Isn't that so incredible? That's so cute. Isn't so cute.
Love that for me. Hand made. He made it so cute. Like, you notice, like, just some. I love that.
I love some. Yeah. That's your number one. Yeah. No, but it's a number one. You're going to
get mad because you do like high fashion. Yeah, I dress them. Yeah, I want. I like. I like
beyond your taste. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like Gaga meat dress. What? What do you want? What do you?
No, but I was trying to have them. Are you? I'm not offended by that. Yeah. Am I supposed to
me? No, no, no. Pause. I perceive it to you. Are you okay? Yeah. Yeah. Wait. Wait. Why?
No, no, nothing. It's just. Is Iran attacking? No. Are we attacking Iran?
It's fucking. It's actually, we don't even need to delete this part.
Larry Ellison bought it. It's going to be the new boss at CNN. And I have a bunch of. Oh,
he bought CNN. I have a bunch of. Yeah. Oh, no. Is he my brother's too? Yeah. Oh, he's
my everything. He's going to basically all the media properties in the fucking. I thought you
just hated Sasty Best. No, no, no, no. I just. Yeah. In that moment, I was thinking like, I'm going
to get so much fucking awful news coverage. Don't worry, Hassan. Let's.
Marsh, how much do we make on the Patreon last month? Let's make a counteroffer.
What do you think? What's by CNN? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I got a couple 10 billion despair.
Yeah. I like Sasty Besties outfit. Yeah. Yeah. Fantastic. I know what you're saying. You're like
fit in. You don't like the way I address. No, no, no, I do. No, no, no. I'm a big boy. I go for
memorable like memorable in like, I gotta go for Kitchie. Girl, the more words you add, you can
just say you don't like it. No, I do like it. Wait, but just because she likes that guy. That's
like my mouse a dog fit that I got in China. Yeah. I remember that one. See, that was memorable.
Yeah. I remember that one. But I remember your red suit too. See? And you, I remember your
clear shirt. Oh, yeah. The one that that I found. No, no, no. This was a different one. He's
smelly shirt. I do remember it too. I had like encapsulated my nipples. Yeah. And I didn't
realize that until I got on stage. Oh, yeah. This is my first red carpet in a while where I'm
very skinny though, which I'm excited. Will you have never been fat? I know. I know. But now I'm
just like, you've never been to see that my clip of you closing the door of Caroline's clip.
You, yeah, it was me reacting. Will walks in. There's this clip. Caroline's just like, will you
close the door, darling? You know, Charlie? Yeah. Yeah. And then we'll walk in and his panties.
And you can see my house. Close is the door. It was like a just scare. But the thing is you knew
that people could know I literally was like so far back. And I did like sure. No, just like,
just like the comments were glazing him. They're like, he's so ripped, he's whatever. This is
it got a million views. I got to ask you a question. I want to know something. I've seen a couple
of the pictures of your you and your underwear that you posted. What? I've seen a couple of pictures
of your, no, you and your underwear. I've seen a couple of pictures of you and your underwear.
This is a way for public. You said you want to know how much it weighs? No,
what's happening? No, no, no. I could care less about how much it weighs. Okay.
What? Like, is this stop? I don't want to know anything about your. Why are you gesturing?
You're asking about it. I don't want to know about it. No one brought up his list. What are you
asking about? I'm curious. You don't want to know the weight. Is it? I don't care about the weight
or the earth or the length. You were gesturing. Okay. Or the length. Were you like, were you
aware that your member was on display for nobody? Shut the fuck up. You took that mirror photo
shirtless and had no idea that your jump was. I should have rubbed it. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
No. Put it on my tombstone. I should have rubbed it. Every time I take a picture of my
in my underwear, I'm always conscious of the way my guy. I should have rubbed it, gave it a
give it a little kickstart. You know what I mean? Is there a female version of this? Maybe nipples.
Hardnips. Oh, you guys do that. No, they. No, it was really in for a while, having hard nipples.
To the point that I believe one of the generous sisters, I believe it was Kylie. Maybe I'm
making this up. If I am funny, rumor Kylie, you're welcome. I got Botox in her nipples.
No. Yeah. It was a rumor I heard. I don't know if it's real. If I'm making up a fun,
I remember that study. But yeah, then it made her like, perma hard so that it like,
because nipples aren't accessory though. It's just easy to get hard though. Your nipples.
I mean, I won't do it right now, but I just is just one little. Well, that's not the same for
girls. Oh, really? No. Is that really not the same? You as take a second? How did Jennifer
Anniston get him so rock solid? She could just she could just have like bigger nipples.
Because if you have bigger nipples, they put ice on them bad boys. Nothing we weren't doing
that during friends. She probably just has like, you know, I always remember of super bad
the episode. Yeah. Jonah Hill and Mick Levin are in a gas station and he goes, she got baby toes
for nipples. And I always think so like a little tiny like a big like some people have tiny nipple
and some people have big one. Right. And they can have not pepperoni areolas. They can have like
small ideals. Do you remember what topic we're on right now? Nipples. We'll we'll quit talking.
What a nipples make you talk about topics. Just let us roll. All right, damn. I have something to
talk about. The fear and West Coast train to he hasn't forgot. Oh, that's a topic. Yeah, it is.
Actually, I'm just gonna roll. Hey, so talk to me about what you did today.
I interviewed Ben Rhodes. I interviewed Nita Alam in North Carolina for. And then right after that,
I interviewed the Barack Obama National Security Advisor Ben Rhodes who played a formative role in
the Iran denuclearization agreement also known as the JCPOA. And also played a role in the Cuban
normalization talks. I'm trying to get him to come today. Yeah, I'm trying to get him to come
to the QA trip with us. I did a reactive stream. So yeah, that's that's you're a different man
in the AM than you are in the PM. Yeah, I'm well, you know, I melt. I started my day at at six. I
had a big podcast beforehand where I did the stream with who? With these two contocritic Chris
Conzler and overzoil like a political one. Yeah, that guy does politics. Now Austin,
did you have anything you want to talk about today? Of course I did. Okay. And I want Austin met
Ben Rhodes. And oh, it was really funny. Apparently, he was like walking out and Austin shook his
hand. Go ahead, Austin. What did you do? Well, I didn't know who the guy was. Be honest with you.
I was like, oh, Hassan's talking to somebody. He was bald, wasn't he? Yes. Okay, which is nothing.
No, no problem. Right? I just had no one thought you didn't tell that moment. Ben
Rhodes, I had no idea who he was. But I was like, okay, he must be a somewhat national security
advisor to Barack Obama former president. Right. Former president. Wait, so he still does it?
No, he used to former former president. Well, I know, but former presidents get security forever.
No, no, wait, what? That was awesome. No, you see, I don't even know that I was funny.
I'm just joining it. Okay. National security advisor is a, is a, a, a White House position.
Right. Okay. Mr. Obama, would you like your daily briefing? No, I've been retired for many years.
I would still take a briefing. So what a national security advisor does is like they play a role in
like doing foreign policy. Oh, so did you ask him out aliens? No, no, security, security,
what do you mean? I mean, honestly, because I, if he's on security, he's better be watching
the aliens. No, I think. And Obama just did an interview where he said aliens are real,
and then he had to backtrack and he had to be like, yeah, they're probably rude.
That was a really good obama. That was your best impression. Oh, they're probably real lost.
It was one. So anyway, I meet the ball guy. That's crazy. That's crazy. What again?
National security is not going to fucking see this. He's the park. He has a family. He loves it.
You might see it. Well, look, I'd like to issue a very public apology. I don't have anything
against bald people. In fact, I suffer from the same condition you do. I'm just not quite as far
along in the process. He does. Oh, fucking hat of hair. Anyway, out of it.
National security advisor for Barack Obama had no idea until his son said something. So he,
as he was leaving, he couldn't find the door. So I said, it is hidden. I'm going to help you.
And I, and then as I was leaving, I shook his hand. I said, thank you for your service.
And is that weird? I said, thank you for your service to this nation.
And I just wanted to thank him because I felt bad. He was bald. He told me he's like, I don't
know what he was doing, but he seemed, he seemed serious. Wait, what? I think that's nice.
I thought I thanked him for his service to this nation. And I told him I was an American citizen.
And I was so off the fear and I was a podcast go over shared a little bit. I just wanted to
let him know. I'm in a homosexual relationship. I just want to know that I live in Portland,
Oregon, but I spent quite a good deal of time here in Los Angeles. But yeah, it's got you'd
like to know it was nice to meet him. And I also told him, I said, you know what? Don't worry about
all this. They make great two pays now. They actually call them, uh, with installments. I
want to tell, I want to tell this to bald people out there. I want to say, you know what?
I think bald people are some of the freest people on the planet. Yeah. Because I think once you
finally let go of your hair, you are, you just look that way forever. And you just, you know,
you just kind of take it all at once. And it's just kind of that's it. You know what I mean?
You don't have to worry about. I feel like you've done. That was a pump up speech for bald people.
I'm pretty sure they'd fucking kill themselves right now. If you had to pump up a bald man,
you're like, I mean, it's as bad as it's going to get. You gave up. I mean, look,
can't get any lower. You know what? I don't think there's, and this isn't, I mean, this being
there's no shame to bald people, but I love watching the TikTok like hair system installment.
I love them. Oh, like where were they? Were they where they put the hair back? Yeah. And I'm
just saying, like, yeah, the two pays nowadays are so good. If you're bald and you don't want to be,
you don't have to be, you know, what I say, they're really good. You know what I say? I'm saying
that. Someone like, I have small boobs. I don't have to have small boobs. You don't, yes, I do.
It's a B. I think it's a booty. I think it's an A. She's booty. No, it's a B. Austin. They're
is a smaller than B. Yeah. Oh, thank you. I was trying to give you a seat. I was trying to give
you an A. We'll see it. He was trying to give you a passing. Yeah, he didn't realize. I give him an
ash. You know, I'm saying there's, I think, I think this is my hot take. If women were the ones
more likely to go bald, all of us bitches would be wearing wigs. It's true. You know, because
beauty standards, my grandmother used to say that every woman should have a wig in her wardrobe.
I do have one now. Wow. Cool. And you know what my grandfather used to say? What's that? He hated
ways. No, he used to say, my grandfather slurs. My grandfather hated it. Wow, this is such a bad
joke. No, his grandfather is, my grandfather was very woke, but he was also born in 1923. Right.
So my grandmother used to have fake eyelashes, you know, wig, you know, and my grandfather,
we may have to cut this. My grandfather used to say to his pals. Oh, no, locker room talk.
It was bad room. He used to say, you know what? Every night I don't know, I don't know whether to
get in bed or get in the drawer. We don't get it because she had a wig and eyelashes and
get in the drawer like hide from her. No, get in the drawer because that's all of her stuff would
like have sex with her stuff. No, wait, I don't get it.
Wait, have I gone, Dumber? We can't cut the soul. No, no, no, like, no, no, get it, getting in bed,
like basically my grandfather had, my grandmother had, you know, a lot of accessories,
prosthetics, prosthetics, you know, eyelashes, eyebrow. So we wanted to hide like he didn't recognize
her. No, she would take them off and put them somewhere and he's like, oh, my, more of my wife
is in the drawer than his in the back. Oh, which is obviously, so it was to have sex with that.
No, I don't think my grandparents had sex at a certain point. They definitely did.
I old people get real horny. Oh, cutie. I'm on Reddit. The love of what they do.
Ladies and gentlemen, and just like that, time flies when you're having a good time with
your end podcast. Ladies and gentlemen, we're off to the Patreon. We're going to talk for another
hour. That's right. And I brought another ADHD toy. Oh, yes, ADHD toy. Oh, it's sticking out.
Oh, my God. That one boxing builds. This is it for you.
Wait, it comes alive in water. That's right. Oh, my God. Thank you so much. That's it. Marshalls.
Why is she telling us about it? I think it's so dumb.
Oh, me too. I like it. I like it. I would know more about what the fuck happened.
She's not going to tell you because it's between Cody and her. Okay, let me, let me say something.
What? When two people get a divorce. Yes. It's because something didn't work out. Right.
Right. Right. And in this case, something didn't work out between them.
And that's it. Why am I supposed to give a shit? I've been a follower of
Michaela since she had 35,000 followers and she was doing makeup hauls outside of a new jersey
target. And I need to know why she and Cody are no longer in a relationship. I will fucking kill
myself. I mean, what about you? March, are you still doxing Cody? Yeah, we're going to,
we're going to dox. So cutie. What, what, what, what, what is the,
the girl pop take is that she's insane for being like everybody sit down. Yeah, that was pretty
take it in. Yeah, I don't know if there's any relationship for yourself. I think Michelle
and Obama is the only time I'd be like, yeah, I'm upset. Do you remember where you were?
What's his first name again?
The president. I know I couldn't think of his first name. That's crazy. I don't know
everyone's first name off the back. That's the most recognized one name. What's Trump's first name?
Donald. Okay, you guys are quick.
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