Post Foxtrot Clarity

0:00This episode is brought to you by Nordstrom. For 125 years, Nordstrom has been part of your story. The stylist who found the perfect outfit for your big interview. The first pair of walking shoes for your one-year-old. The tomato soup you shared with your sister at the cafe. These are the moments that make Nordstrom. Nordstrom. Bigger a small? We're here for all of it. Celebrating 125 years with new moments still add. Discover it all in NordstromStores and at Nordstrom.com. Hey guys, welcome back to Birkin Connor Makeup Podcast. It's a brand new day.

1:00What are you doing? What am I doing? For the audio only listeners, Brooke is giving someone a mammogram. Nope. What are you doing? Six-seven. Oh, six-seven, okay. Because you're my seven-six-seven king. Oh, thank you. Okay, so we're going to get right into the... What else is there to do? Well, then we'll just segment it and I'll cut us off. I want to say something. No one wants you to cut me off. I'm going to cut myself off. I'm going to... I don't want anyone to get tired of me. No, Connor. This is a once in a lifetime. This is once in a lifetime. Every single person is watching. Like we'll never get to do that again. You know? Oh my God, that's sad. That's all on the same boat and in it too. We're in the same boat. On it, we're in it. I hope you have your sea legs. Oh. I put my sea legs on this morning. Did you? Yeah. Wow. What are sea legs? I don't know. I'm going to be in the poop deck. Which I know you know you're wearing.

2:00Girl. Come on, poop deck. Girl. Oh, I have to tell you something housekeeping related really quick. Hit me with the housekeeping. I know your birthday was like a long time ago, but I've been working on something. Yeah. And I'm hoping that it will be ready by next week. Okay. And it's something that we can all experience. Oh, fun. Yeah. So that's something to look forward to. Wow. I'm getting a little bit antsy. Well. That's exciting for everyone. That's all I have to say. I didn't want to think I didn't get you anything for your birthday. I forgot about that. I even have a birthday. But thank you. I'm excited. Yeah, I'm excited too. I'm a little bit nervous. Okay. Yeah. Can I be honest about something? Yeah. I came in a little bit heated rivalry. Because I didn't get your birthday birthday? Yeah. Because of the birthday. No. Because I was making a turn into a parking structure. That'll happen. And slowly inching my way, because there was so much traffic, but they were letting me through. And a biker runs through the thing and yells at me.

3:04And then pulls his bike to the curb and just continues to yell at me. And I understand, as a biker, you're constantly fighting in uphill battle because it seems like everyone against you because we are. But one infrastructure needs to be better for biker so that they can say the hell away from everybody. All for like carless cities and walkable cities, but like this is not the world we live in right now. Okay. Even though like I understand like this person and their completely skin type adult man skin type outfit as a hobby. Me and my pinks just talks last night. I'm a little bit, um, just yelling at me. I'm like, you're putting, this is a choice you made this morning. Someone yelled at me last week. Yeah. I couldn't see what he was saying. And he just kept saying the same thing over and over again. And I was like so upset beyond belief. And I thought I think he was saying line because he was crossing the crosswalk. And like I think he was suggesting that I was like blocking it, but I wasn't.

4:08And then I realized like five minutes later that my lights were off. Oh lights. He was saying lights. I had spent so much time being angry at him when really he didn't deserve it. So maybe the situation is different in a way like that. Maybe we maybe he was telling you congratulations on your 767. Oh my gosh, you're right. Yeah. Hmm. Brooke perspective is everything. Yeah, he probably recognized you. Thank you for that. Yeah. That's really sweet. Perspective is a good thing to have. Mm hmm. Well, yeah. So last night we our scores were like the best. Obviously we've ever we've ever had out of the three. Yeah. It feels like I've been doing this for two and a half years. I mean, you did amazing. Thank you. Really? You mean that? Of course. I would have loved to see more of you. But the camera was like not showing me your feet. Yeah, obviously like I can't watch it. So but like the camera guy was getting kind of flamed in the comments. Actually, yeah. So there was like a solid five seconds, where it was just like zoomed in on your

5:08mullet, which like awesome. I love the mullet. But like I want to see my friends feet as he is dancing. So that was hard. But like you you you looked amazing. And I know you were amazing. Oh, thanks. Yeah, you were completely incredible. I thought you were going to get three sevens. And might I say I was surprised that it was Derek that gave you the six. Not that a six is bad by any means. The six is freaking fabulous. But he seemed really excited. So I was confused by that. Yeah, the one piece of feedback he actually came out to me after and was just like the shoot was an oversized shoot for 80s. The he was like yeah, rock. And there was too much fabric on the shoulders. So when I was in frame, which frame everyone has had an opinion on frame. I totally I had dropped my elbow a little bit, which sucks because I've been putting grocery bags on my on my crevices. So my elbows in my apartment so that I can hold and I put like candles and like bottles of shampoo in them to so that it waits. Yeah, I could get like weighted bracelets, ball of bracelets, but I had forgotten about

6:09those. So I've been walking around in frame in my apartment. And of course the one time I dropped my elbow a little bit is show day. And then I think that there was you were so good that now we're focused on those little technical. And my butt like Bruno Bruno's comment was about tucking my butt keeping my butt in. It was so nice to get like Bruno. Yeah, like the Bruno that I know. Yeah, yeah. Bruno knows here. And then the leading man comment I, you know, wow. How'd you feel about that? Congratulations to my mom. Yeah, that's what I wanted to say. Like yeah, my scores were good. Congrats to my mom. But like and you know, I'll give Karen credit when she earns it. Like she flip that into something positive. You know, like you might not have been leading, which is fine. Not everyone has to lead all the time, by the way. What do you say for followers breaking, breaking gender norms, etc. But you are supporting and supporting can be even better than leading.

7:11I, well, when there when I need as a woman, yeah, sometimes I don't want most of the times I don't want to be led. I want to be supported. And my dancer, no, but just in life, I love your support. And I'm sure Riley the last night too. And Karen noticed that. Thank you, Karen. Karen, I really like appreciate her view back. I know that I like and has thought it to be hard. I like the way she delivers things. That's like the way that I delivered it. You like such a shame. It was, it was such a shame. We performed it and it wasn't the best version of us perform it. Like that made sense to me. See the, I struggle to struggle with the delivery. She did something last night. I forget who it was. But it was akin to such a shame to me. Someone said it could have been Taylor. Yeah. Someone stepped on someone's foot or something like that. Oh, it was Jenna Dewan. Oh, maybe it was Jenna. I don't know. Someone's, yeah, she was like, it was something.

8:14And then she started off with like, are you okay? Like, I know, I know it really hurts when you like and then just went into that fuck up. That didn't it with me. Oh, there's Jenna Dewan. I don't care. He's gonna be okay. She will be okay. But like it's just like, to me. Yeah. Well, that's the, that's the, that's the nature of the job. I guess. Eric doesn't do it that way. Did you see my face? Yeah, but like Simon, Simon Cowell also doesn't, you know, Simon Cowell, someone has to like put the hammer down. Like, is like nasty. Simon, yeah, is a nasty individual. What's going on with him? I don't think anything good. Did he have like something outside of American Idol that threw him into the deep end or was that? Yeah. He was definitely going through. He was definitely under fire for a while. Did he? I think it was something to do with like working people too hard. I think like, that's something had happened with a, like a lot of people he worked with

9:19were like either like going through. You know what would be an, something. An incredible talent show. Simon Cowell. The like Tyra Banks, Ellen DeGeneres, and it's just titled Welcome to Hell. Welcome to hell. Who brought my mattress? I'll be nice. I'll be nice. I don't get the, I don't get the mattress part. I guess someone on Ellen seemed, said that she needed to travel with her mattress, which like, you get to, I'm sure you would love to travel with your mattress. Sure I would. Like travel on my mattress. Like a lot. I had a dream of like a haunting in Connecticut last night, but it was like my child didn't have a horrible nightmare about you. But I can't tell you because this is about your birthday present. Okay. It's a call you later. So don't be scared about your birthday present. I also, I want to say two quick things. Could you see my face during the dance? Yeah. Because everyone's saying that like my face, doesn't, my face needs work.

10:19I would never say that about your face. Nobody woulds taking a toll. They're saying my face needs work. What does that mean? Like medical work? No, like, that was a fun dance. I need to be smiling. Oh, I didn't notice anything off. The lighting is so unfortunate in that room. Unless you have great like a bone structure like Ezra or Val. I think you look great. Thanks. I think that like the shading of the mullet did strip away my granted. It was part of the costume. It stripped away any form of like jawline. So it was just kind of like a straight up thing. And I was getting a couple comments that I noticed. He looks like the actor from the last of us. And someone said, Hey, Troll. Someone said, did you mean Bella Ramsey? Yeah. Bella Ramsey. Next. He looks like my aunt. She smoked a lot of cigarettes in the 90s.

11:20And then someone just commented, my aunt did wonderful tonight. I loved that. Did anyone say anything about Coach Beast? Who's Coach Beast? Did anyone say anything about that? Because if not, it's not even... Well, no. Last night I decided to unplug because it would be best for my aunt. Okay, yeah. I'm not saying you looked like Coach Beast at all. But with the mullet, there was a... I was thinking of her. Can I see Coach Beast? No, no, no. We don't have to pull Coach Beast up. I think I want to see Coach Beast. The mullet's gone. I was going to wear it today. Oh, God. Coach Beast was just the mullet. It was just the mullet that was giving a little bit. I loved the mullet, though. You didn't look like Coach Beast. It was just something brought Coach Beast up for me. But I also... The mullet gave me a few different things. Like on one hand, I was like, I love it. I like it. I love it. And then on one hand, I was like, it's interesting. You know what I mean? Did it give you any good things? I just thought I like it. I love it. You didn't look like Coach Beast.

12:22I also loved Coach Beast. I also loved Coach Beast. Right. Personality wise. No, and physically. I don't know anything about Coach Beast's character. You look like Coach Beast. I don't know Coach Beast's heart. You look like Coach Beast. But I do feel like those photos weren't indicative of Coach Beast. I think definitely was rocking maybe like a mullet at one point. Coach Beast at a glance was more... Handsome woman. Yeah, that's fine. Yeah. I do think you know Coach Beast wasn't glee. I think that Coach Beast transitioned halfway through the season, but I don't know about real life. Okay. So it's hard for me to say. I had no knowledge of... Maybe you'll watch Lee now that you know Harry. Yeah. Harry looks good in his mustache last night. He looks great in his mustache. Yeah. Everyone's saying that when Kenzie and Carson came last week to the show, they said it was like bone chilling. How much we look like. You and Harry. Yeah. They were like it was freaking exciting. I can see it.

13:22Okay. I can definitely see that now that you said that. Okay. Yeah. I don't want anyone to think I was insulting Connor. No, no. It's Coach Beast came up for me. Listen, I can take it. I can definitely take it. Okay. I love it. Now that I have this... I'm cool to move on past dancing now. Oh, I'm not. I have so much to say, but about other. A few other takes that I have about other people. Can I really quickly just knock these out really quick? Are they dance? Yeah. Oh, yeah. One sorry I was miserable last week. That was my first note in this. It's funny to co from the show. And then the first people I talk to is this thing that everyone watches. So it's hard for me to shake my personality. You were miserable. I was very negative last week. No, you weren't. I didn't need to be. You were not. And I'm going to be a little bit negative this week because we talked about this when I first came in. Like, as soon as I get off the stage after performing, I get like post-nut clarity of like, why did I do that?

14:24Like you got the ick from yourself. Like the ick? I totally, like you should not. Oh, like last time I got like really hyper because I was excited and then I was like, what do you do? Calm down. I had totally felt that way. Like I was going like this in the background and I saw and I was like, oh my gosh. No. I feel that way often. You know, and then I convinced myself that like we didn't deserve the scores that we got. And it's like they, we've seen historically that they're very comfortable giving scores that we deserve. So I need to get through that. And then we went. So the one kind of misstep that I had that wasn't like a literal misstep. It was just kind of like jumpy, which sucks is that's really smooth dance. The fox rat was in the corner. We went back to the corner that I don't like on the dance or the front left corner. We were in the corner. I was wearing new shoes like you have like PTSD from that corner. Mm-hmm. I really don't like that corner. And like to get through it, I've been, we've been going to that corner. I'm like, I know.

15:25I'm familiar with the corner and there's actually other, the cast of Glee was in that corner. That's incredible. I keep having like my friends from my life come and like I think I need to start having like some characters from Glee sit in my next to my parents. I wouldn't mind. I would honestly like to carry an invite list. I would like, and I would like to be seated there as well. Cool. If you could don't mind going through my contacts. Happy to do it. And choose me. You're your contacts that are on Glee. I don't have any. I'm saying, for example, like Harry to Glee, me too, people that I've made me be confronted with. Okay. I'll curate my leg dream blunt rotation of your friends and put me in coach. Thank you. Yeah. So that sounds good to me. So next week we're dancing to touch my body by Mariah Carey. And if you boot me from the ballroom next week, I will riot. No one's getting booted from the ballroom. You're not getting booted. I have to be there. Yes. Hey guys, we want to take a break to think a sponsor of today's episode or be Parker.

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19:34Getting the leading man comment this week and then having what is definitely the sexiest like the the tango was more romantic. This is like a sexy dance. I do have several body rolls. It's a rumba and the way that my body is really refusing to roll at this time is interesting. You can roll. I know I can roll. I'll have to roll is the thing. You'll roll because you have to. I'll have to roll. As was written. Yeah. So come time I will be rolling. But as of now like I certainly like I can't I'm not rolling and I don't feel sexy in my role, but I'll have to figure it out. But it is. How can we make you feel as sexy as possible? Yeah, that's the other thing is like I'm not fishing for other people to make me feel sexy. The sexy so I could feel as if I get this dance. No, we need you to feel sexy. I know I want to get the dance down. I just need to go to practice. What will you wear while you're rolling? It's very simple. It's a show. Are you showing skin? Yeah, it's just the same like shirts coming. shirt coming down.

20:35How far? Show me. Before. Well, I stop. Tell me when to stop. Stop right there. Yeah, like right below my nipples. Okay. But we'll have to tape it down because I had to wear spanks last night because my nipples were showing. And like it was showing and it was like show it was like so nasty. It wasn't like my broad show. You do not call my friends body nasty. No, no, my body wasn't nasty. No, I don't call my friends spanks nasty. They had to cut them down so they wouldn't show. That's that's a lot. And it was just like cut spanks underneath my body. Like body suit. Was it like bathing suit speedo on the bottom? No, it was like a tank top. Okay. But it was just nasty looking. It was like my skin color and they like cut it down and it was just kind of like loose oof. That's fine. Like a deep V. Like a very deep loose V. Yeah. Like it looked like a loose V. Okay, looser than you're comfortable with typically. But leading man, that will be that will be the true test. Yeah. Like I heard what you said about leading man. Check this out. I bet they like get so horny for like you really taking their feedback seriously.

21:41Like even if you mess up next week, if you do leading man, like I bet you'll get really high scores. I sure hope so. I sure know so. But we'll see. It will be it'll be a fun. We get two good weeks and I'll say be fun. Yeah. Because that will be as of next week, that will be four or four weeks of dancing in the stars which I'm very, you know, like what do we come to do? We came came here to have fun. That's the other thing about me like getting like oh my gosh, I did so much. I was talking about like actors are so scared to get ugly. People are kind of I think this has become the answer to start has become so much pressure because there's so much commentary on it. Everyone's an expert that like it has been a little bit stripped down of like I'm wearing a pink suit and I have a mullet on. This is not life or death. Like nothing here is serious. Please be so serious. I got here three weeks ago and I'm learning a fox chart. Like this is pure fun. This should be fun to watch on TV. You should be watching with your kindergarten or you should be watching with your grandma. You should be giggling. You should be like all that's cute.

22:41There should be nothing like no. My hot take is that he should be taken out back and shot. There's no room for that here. It's fun. We got to let our hair down and enjoy it and I've had to tell myself that. So that's why I feel so comfortable. Got it. Maybe I need to take that to heart because you know I get angry with some of the judges. I know. With a few of the judges sometimes. Well they're doing their job. I think that the scoring aspect comes in as like a. Score makes no sense. I love it though. And the digital fun piece. I think it's the coolest part. Now is that we went last year and I was like I'm confused why they wouldn't do. Tango night, Fox track night. You know, but now I get it. I don't. Can you try and explain it? One, they're definitely. I guess everyone would get bored of the same dance. And it's two. It's too. Identity. If I had a salsa right after Harry show him does a salsa. It's just like. Gonna be an unfortunate lineup.

23:41You know, it's just gonna be like, oh he needs to go home tonight. Can you do a repeat? Like if you already saw said, can you saw say again in the finals? Okay. What kind of dances do you have left? A waltz. A waltz. Viennese waltz. Viennese. Viennese. I don't know Viennese. I don't even know. Viennese. Oh, the Viennese. Yeah. I thought it was like Viennese. Like there's just like there's just like alien woman. Italian place. Yeah. Or like, xenon from the future. Zenon waltz. The Italian place at the end of your street. People. People. Um, see the other thing my parents keep going to Italian every single night after dancing in the starts. Yeah, I got one at the same place every time. No, they've managed to find three separate Italian restaurants within one block. I know the ones. Yeah. One was like completely money laundering vibes when I ordered food. They were like, what? Have you gone to the one next to me? I don't know. Probably not. Okay. Making our way that way. I'm sure. I would love I would love to have you.

24:42Viennese waltz. Salta. Salta. You didn't salsa yet? Salta yet. No. Um, pasta doble. Which Jackson did last night. I have not. I've never heard about the possible doble. It's what Guillermo did last week. And then it's with the it's kind of like obviously. YMCA. Yeah, it's kind of like YMCA. And then drive and quick step. And I'm sure there's more than I'm missing. So far you've done a fox drive. And there's one that starts in the S. Are we doing the Ramba? What was your first night? So I'm done. So I'm done. And you've done a cha cha. Cha cha. We did cha cha tango. Fox right now. Oh, you've not done a drive. That's what um, wait Tyler Cameron either did a drive or a quick step last night. I can't remember. I struggle with like the dance part. Like I really like I don't know anything about dance. And also like when I like I'll watch a dance and I'll be like shit that was like they

25:45really fucked up. And it's like eights across the board. And then I'll watch one and I'm like wow that moved me. Forse. So like I'm really off. Maybe you're just more tuned into the performance piece because you love theater so much. I'm extremely tuned into the performance. Which is interesting that you didn't catch my face last night because I'm getting a lot of comments like your dance was good. Your face is weird. Well, I obviously think you're amazing, but I wonder if there's an element of like susu to me where I'm like you are you are my movie star. You know, or it's like you are my Ryan Gosling like everything you do is just but that's good because it's like I would want to be judge based off of like me and and my performance. I think you're amazing. I know that I have nothing about to say about you all broke turning into susu. I'll take it. That's fun. But I do want to I it's also one of these and you're good dancer though even though I don't know what that means. I want to earn the the scores, you know, you have to be good at the dance.

26:47You are. I definitely think you are. Oh my gosh, took my butt like I don't even have I did see like when they've replayed your butt. I was like I can see that's poking out there. That's valid. Okay. Good. It's just like always something, you know. Hey, tuck your butt in. I'd love a bi week. Bisexual? I don't know what that is. Yeah, instead of the trio night, we're doing a bisexual night. I want to be in bisexual night. You're in the, yeah, you're a little bit friends in your friends and family. Bi week would be just like we don't play that week. Oh, I thought you only have five people on. Legendary. Oh, you'd be living bi curiously through me. I want to. What? Well, I anyways, that's all I got. Well, all else I have to say is that I loved my favorite dance beside you was Tatiana.

27:50I thought she did so amazing and what a redemption arc she's having. I love her. I have someone I need to go, but like I'm not going to be mean, but there's someone that needs to go. I wouldn't even know. Yes, you would. I was like spoken about it at length privately, but I will not say it publicly. Well, I just like I wouldn't, I don't have any like at truly every single person when I watch her dance. I'm like, that is, I don't know who could go home. Like when Taylor and Brent went home, I was like, why? Oh, that's what I wanted to say. That's fucked up. Oh. I love Brett. Taylor's great too, but like as I get more into the dancing with the stars community and the lore, like, Brett's one of my favorite probably. I just, Brett is completely robbed every season. And even when she made it to fifth place with Daniel, you know, who's now her husband, that fifth wasn't even considered a finalist then. And now it would be. And now it would be. I think. Yeah.

28:50We've written our connect a lot. Taylor and Brent separately connected with a lot since I've been there. I love them both. I really didn't serve it though. I know. And it was really tough to watch because I feel like the first two episodes, like the people went home, they like had an idea. That was a possibility. And I feel like Britain Taylor really weren't expecting it because they shouldn't have expected it because that wasn't the right call. Which really sucked. So I'm, I mean, I'm rooting for them. I love Brett and I really hope she can't, we'll see her again next year. And I would want her to be my partner. I would never go, be asked to go on or go on. But if I, if I would, I would want Brett. So watch. But do you think you, do you think you would do it? Never. Really? Like opportunity of a damn like time. Okay. If I get like really famous and they're like, we will pay you so much money. Still now. It's just like. Just like, anxiety or what? I mean, I can't imagine living in that state.

29:53I mean, I would die. My body would go into shock. Like you can't, I don't think the body can function with, with that much cortisol. Like I would be puking for weeks and weeks so sick. Like I would have diarrhea all over the ballroom floor. Like think of the girl running the marathon. Like me in the ballroom, me in the ballroom being spun around. Everyone moved. Like it's not. It's just like the, it's just like the worst. And you know what makes me even more nervous than the dancing. What? Because you know how I get saved right for other people. The post interview for whatever reason. Oh, let's talk about my post interview. Can we? Oh, yeah, I'd love to. You're so endearing. I keep forgetting that's where I need to tell my story. I go up and she goes, how do you feel? I go, I'm an awake. I mean, you know what? Sometimes we'll get your story and sometimes we'll get you and we'll be ready for both. Julian and I are like, I'll talk about Joel's. Joel's. I really like her. Like we are, I think we're friends unless I miss,

30:56well posted you on her story. I know. We were having really fun. I want to talk about that too. I kind of like really like them. I feel like they got a lot of heat, the huffs. Oh, I really like Derek. Yeah. I like them both a lot. Yeah. And they're very friendly. I mean, everyone's really friendly. But Derek comes out, makes goes out of his way to like find me and talk to me. So there's a Fonzo Julian too. But I love Fonzo. My post game interview, when I was supposed to go out there and tell our story, I would, I think we were going to talk about like my mom's comments and whatever. And so when I got the question about like, was this redemption, I was like, yeah, redemption you look like anything. Yeah. And I was trying to get to that really quick. And I was like, you know what I was like, I love when Julian just like, it's like, how did it feel to hear like, oh, that was horrible. Oh, you did terribly walk me through what you felt when that was said. Love that bullshit. I like that too. The redemption thing, I was like, oh, yeah, I do feel, I feel good.

31:57I feel redeemed. And I was waiting for the next question. I was like, all right, time for the score. So I was like, oh my god, I didn't get to do any like story stuff. Because it was, it was like truly leading up after you mess up. One that should be like, okay, I already did worst case scenario. Like it can't get worse than last week when that feeling of like, okay, I just messed up time to get feedback. Like I'm already aware like, I would literally like if I were in a situation situation where I messed up, I would just, if we get, we get to the feedback, I'd say, let's pass this week. Let's pass this week, put it in an email. I like, I don't think I'd be able to receive it, which is another reason like, not just on a match. Yeah. So like that was bad. And then, but you know what's worse than that. Leading up mean like, what if I did it two weeks in a row? Yeah, I imagine that's really stressful. And so I wanted to talk about like that was my trying to shake that this week was like the biggest roadblock for me to be like, okay, like something about what happened last week.

32:58It's this week. And just like working on this distance and like not thinking about that and then like starting on next week's dance and like, oh my gosh, like what if we don't, you know whatever. But then that didn't, I wasn't able to share that. The other thing and then this is the last thing I'm saying. This is like, I'm unplugging. I'm going to start treating this like traders like, I don't have my phone. Like, I don't know what's happening. I'm going to get off the island and I'll check in on my socials, you know. Me when I lie. But cannot wait to look at my phone. But one thing I said, everyone is like, he's so anxious. He's so anxious. Give him a Xanax, put him on a beta blocker. You feel something. Why is it such a shame for me to feel something? Like this is still fun, even though I'm so anxious. Like it's a rewarding feeling to be anxious and then feel relieved or like work at something and then have performance things. You guys can sit there with it if I was never anxious. Yeah. It's like, why is everyone so concerned about me being like, completely biting my fingernails and like looking nervous on TV?

33:58It's TV. It's fun. That's what you would if I was sitting there just kind of like, that would be so boring. Completely. You're having a feeling stuff and being raw and doing things unmedicated. Yeah. Plenty of people do things unmedicated on reality TV. That's why we have real housewives. That's why we have summer house. That's why we have all these amazing franchises that last so long because no one's on their ads. I don't take any meds. But I actually can't believe there are as many people willing to do dancing with the stars as there are. Because to me, it truly seems like the most anxiety inducing, strenuous, just like big for lack of a better word, just like the biggest thing in the world to me. I'm shocked that there are that many people who are like, sign me up. You know what I mean? Hi breaking news. We want to take a great to the biggest sponsor of today's episode, Quince.

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37:04I think allergy season is back. I think so too. Okay. Unrelated to this. I can't believe I became someone who has something that they need to have. Like I can't sleep now without this old blanket. And I have one in this apartment that I'm living in temporarily. I don't see myself ever living in a home without a Lola blanket now. And I'm not just doing this. I don't even know what the ads are. What does the ad say? What do they want me to say? And then I'll throw in my pieces too. They said, the second I get home, I'm changing in a comfortable clothes getting on the couch and driving my Lola blanket, that's what I was going to say anyways. I know that. It's genuinely, it's heavy, but it's not too hot. You know, I run really hot. I sleep with it. I am like a big old baby that goes, I get in my bed and go, something's not quite right. Like the princess and the pea. Yeah. But I'm the prince and the Lola. I'm like, something's not right in my bed. My Lola's on the couch. I'd walk out, we need a poo, make a bottom half, grab my Lola blanket, trudge back to my

38:07bed and pass out. Perfect. Lola has made Ultra Soft luxury faux fur and has this four way stretch that makes it so comfortable to curl up in. And very importantly, it's machine washable. It's double hemfer durability and designed not to pill or shed even after a peated wash is. It's one of those things that feels like such a little luxury every single day. I use my watching TV, working from the couch, napping, basically any activity where I have the option of being under a blanket. And my cats are obsessed with it. Really? Yeah, they groom it. They groom it. Yeah, it's really cute. Like this thing? No, that's biscuits. I like to talk about biscuits. Okay. We're getting into that time of the year where there are birthdays. There's been about 180 birthdays in my personal life in September, but November is even worse. What's after September? I'll cope or two. Housewarming. People hosting. Eventually, the holidays in Lola is one of those gifts that feels really luxurious, but you know the person is actually going to use it. It's also one of those things you don't realize you don't, you need until you have one.

39:08I was like a later doctor to Lola. I was like, yeah, right. I was wrong. Suddenly you need one in every room. That was mean. It was crazy to me. And that's part of why I'm so proud of you. It just seems like the craziest thing to put yourself through in such a challenge. I think you could do it. I would love it. Which is a season of you, undanthure the stars. I'm sure everyone would be good entertainment to watch someone die on live television. And go and happen my love.

40:08It would be funny. Oh my gosh. If you got Val and he's just spinning you up in the air, God, I pray for that day. That would hate my ass. No. Four seconds and I'm going to be like, I'm so tired. Yeah. Lucky I got Riley because we are both equally tired. She gets tired. She gets tired. She looked stunning last night. She always looks stunning. She does always look stunning, but like last night I was like, my. Someone said, someone said Riley is walking looking like an absolute princess next to Lord Farquad. That's mean. I can take it. I am there. I said I will do anything. I know. I want to say that's mean. I just called coach beast. I want to look ridiculous. That's the point. This is fun. I know. I'm having the time of my life. Anyway, watching you. Rumba next week. Sexy day. I will be there. I'm saying that now so you can't take it away. No, you got it. Verbal claim. I think that there's just this ridiculous thing where like the

41:13fact that we had the show last night and I'm going to practice tonight or like right up from here to learn the Rumba. Have you already started learning the Rumba? You didn't say what song you're doing. Yeah, I did. Did he? Oh. What's funny is when Riley does the counts of the song. So like we learn it with the one, two, three and then she starts using the lyrics. So it would be like touch my body. Throw me on the floor. And it's like, it's just like ridiculous. It would be okay. And this one step back. Okay. You're going to do a satellite turn. Okay. Now touch my body and throw me on the floor. That's how, yeah, that's been Shapiro walking me through the dance steps. That's how I had to sing in chorus as an alto. Throw me on the floor. Need a little Christmas now. Hall out the hallie. I never got it in the melody. Why were you doing Christmas songs as a Jewish woman? I went to a Quaker School. We did everything.

42:14Nothing. I actually can't, I don't know if we did any Hanukkah songs. You guys were so, I went to, I technically went to a Christian school. It was 60% Jewish, but technically Quakerism is part of Christianity in a way. And oats. Yes. But, oh yeah. I threw up during, we need a little Christmas now. During the chorus concert. During the part. It's time we hung some tinsel on that babe. I ran off. I ran off. It was so hot. The show must go on. Speaking of like me throwing up during that, because it was too high stakes, I'll be dancing with the stars. Me throwing up in a room of 30 parents. Sometimes that's worse. I was talking to Bryce this weekend. King. And he has to, he's ordaining his brother's wedding and he's like, I'm freaking out. Yeah. And that was actually the worst stage I've ever had was for like 150 people.

43:18My friend, both of my friends, parents and grandparents in the front row. I was shaking, turning my fingers with my thing. I have to give a speech at my brother's wedding this year. Wow. As the best man. I guess I'll be nervous. I think you'll be okay. I'm doing tonight. I'm moderating my first author event. So you know how I'm moderated in New York when I'm doing that for my friend, Lila, who is a very big author and I'm sure it will be very scary for me and so I'm very scared. Where's it going to be? How's it going to be? The ripped bodice. It's not like it's her book launch. I wonder if you'll feel less pressure because it's. I'm wondering about how you felt at yours. I mean, like, oh my gosh, it's my book. And then that's how she probably felt. I'm wondering. Maybe a lot less pressure because like, not my book or more because it's like, these people aren't here for me. They don't like fuck. They don't like me or fuck with like, you know, because the piece that I was, I felt the moment of peace during my shows because I was like, these people are here for me.

44:19They don't care if I pass out. But maybe Lila's fans would care if I passed out. Not in like a bad way. They would probably be concerned for your health. Sure. I think it'll be okay, especially now that I feel comfortable with my beta blockers. I'm definitely a little bit nervous. You know, you can't take beta blockers and like do something strenuous. So like, that's another reason why I'm like, oh, I didn't know that. Yeah, it like slows your heart rate so much. Like, I think you just could pass. You can't take beta blockers and do drugs. Okay. Or you will die. Good to know. That's what I've heard. I'm really nervous to do drugs. I'm going to take a beta blocker to calm down. Well, I'm just saying like if you had an event where you took a beta blocker and then had an event where you're like, I'm going to do drugs, you can't. Great to know. Yeah. Moving forward. Just so you know. I have so many things to talk to you about. I want to show you my new toy. Is there anything dancing? No, I wanted to be done with dancing 20 minutes ago. Okay. No, you did not. Yes, I did.

45:20No, you did not. I'm going to an ideal world. Yeah, I did. You think you did, but you, oh, no, you did not. You like to dance. I love to dance. I love to talk about dancing on our podcast too. Are you trying to hypnotize me? No. I got a toy. Okay. Well, it's not really a toy because it's actually a very expensive piece of machinery. Yeah. But I got a word processor, which is like kind of like the toy laptops that you would have as a kid. So it's like, you basically just like write on it and you have no access to the internet. So like I can leave the house with my word processor, no laptop, no phone. And I would have absolutely like zero distractions and be able to write on like my typewriter. Do you want to see it? Yeah. Are you brought in? Oh, I don't go anywhere without my word processor, by the way. Let me see it. And I could bring this on traders. So that just just heads up. Traders check. Just heads up traders. 40 minutes.

46:20I could absolutely still write if I went on traders because now that I have my word processor. I don't know if you could bring your time. You have on traders. I think I think everything I think none. Reading the book. But in theory could totally bring my word processor on traders. Like I'm finally getting back into painting now that I'm on traders. Check out my word processor. This is the travel. Oh, that's sweet. The travelers were free, right? It's a lot of finger. When did you get this? A few days ago. It's covered in grease. All of my gadgets are covered in grease. I'm sorry. I haven't really opened a laptop in a while. Isn't that fun? Oh, yeah. Can I? Can I? Yes. How fun is that? Oh, it's greasy. It's really greasy, bro. Nice. Oh. And then it just goes. Wait, is this your, are you writing something? Oh, don't look at it. Well, just, yeah, I'm writing. I have to write another book. But don't read it. It's like literal like brain, like dump. And don't please don't read it. No, I'm just looking at the names because I'm, I really like one of these names in here. Which name to say it?

47:21Oh, okay. You can say that. Um, it just blasts out to my Google drive. Wow. That's really cool. So it's not connected to Wi-Fi? It's connected to Wi-Fi. Are you nervous like there'll be a family emergency if you go to the coffee shop with no phone? Yes. Okay. But like it's a risk that sometimes you have to take if you need to write another book and you're having a really hard time. If the family emergency happens while you're at the coffee shop and you don't have your phone, did it happen at all? Valid. Yeah, it did. Yeah. So what do you, how would you have that wouldn't have at least you, you know, were productive doing it? Yeah. So I'm super excited. I got it a few days ago. I have been pretty busy. So I haven't really like been able to give it all the attention that I want to. But this is about to change my life. Who are you showing me? Who is that? I don't know. Who is that? I don't know. Someone just died. Like, which is someone just died? Let me see. From Spider-Man. Which Spider-Man, the newer, I haven't seen any of the Tom Holland ones, except for the last one. Well, I want to make it. It was like a. I don't know.

48:22Okay. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. I'm excited. Well, that's exciting. I like that. That's what's going on in my life. We are slowly advancing our way to get our screen time down and I think it's very healthy. Yes. It was really expensive, though, which is interesting. How much was it? It was much as the new laptop. What? Yeah. I don't like get it. But like it was the advantage that I needed to make. Like a step backwards because they're like, you hungry pigies went WiFi, so bad. We're going to make no WiFi more expensive. I think there are deals where like you could, like I know people have gone it for like 250 or something, but I'm extremely impatient. So I needed to get a full price. Damn. Yeah. So. That just reminded me of my dad flew here with a GameCube. So now I have two GameCubes. I have to return the one I bought. Are they coming every week? Yeah. They flew in Monday. They left. They were like, this morning. That's kind of nuts.

49:23They're being show parents, which I really like. Yeah. I know. I wasn't able to. So Mimi will ever come? Yeah. She wants to. I want her to come next week. Oh, maybe she will. Maybe she'll come. Maybe my Mimi will come see me sexy dads. Oh. She will love that. I think she will too. I have a random offshoot, dang, that I want to say. Yeah. And I kind of went on a rant about this, but like I think that you might feel similarly. Okay. Let me just see how I should start this. Okay. I think we should stop making Instagram accounts for movies coming out. That feels good to me. You have nothing? Unless it's a movie I like. Where are you following the Instagram account for a movie? And then what happens when the movies? What happens when the movie comes out? Yeah. I agree. It's a two. It follows something because you feel passionately about it. I found out in college that one of my friends was following the Walgreens Instagram account

50:25and I was like, why are you following Walgreens? You know what it is though? I was like uncomfortable being around them. I was like, what made you click that follow button? I want to follow Walgreens. I can tell you what it is. It's that the actors in the movies like don't want to crowd their feeds with promotion. So like someone has to just make a new account. Because even I got like that with Phoebe. I was like really, I was like, I don't want to bother anyone or like bombard anyone. And I guess actors feel that way about their projects. I don't know. I feel like getting, convincing people to follow an account for that and then like throwing it away. It's like, wow, you really just like used it. You can't use it. I guess it's like they need a, they want to go viral, right? And so they need to make a place where they compose things that might go viral. Like they need a post, you know? We're also going to do it. But maybe it's, you know, doing devil's advocate for movie again.

51:26But maybe, no, I'm not necessarily, but it's like they have to post somewhere. Should it be maybe they should just be doing it on the studios account. Correct. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know why that made me like so. Yeah. I don't know. I felt like somehow she ends fault that there's Instagram accounts for movies. Oh, like over production. We're doing too damn much. Yeah. Just on the side note too. I'm just, so I know this is like the current thing. I'm so over stimulated with actors going on. I know I said this with Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman. Like how many times are we going to get an actor duo like faking like a bizarre love fit? Like every single day it's a new two actors and they're like, oh my gosh, tell them about the story from your trailer when you picked up my socks and not they read them. I really buy in new. I do that. Do you? Oh, Sandra and Nicole and like they're sisters. I don't know. Maybe it's like, I don't know. There was, who was it?

52:27Sorry. I'm back to like being a hater today. That's fine. Who was it recently that was like this isn't working? I don't know. I just love to see two actors that hate each other again. That's the good stuff that I like. Yeah, I get it. When they're so like put Shailing Woodley in a room with literally anyone else. I want to see that. Oh my God, her with that one interviewer where she was like, are you hungry? No. No. I'm hungry. You should eat then. Yeah. That was bad. If I was the interviewer, I would just never. Shailing is a lot on her plate right now. So does she? I don't, it seems like it. I don't know what she's, what's going on. I was like, oh, there's a Scooby-Doo movie coming out. And there's like a whole batch of like young act like going to be like, it's just weird seeing a batch of young actors being like, we're looking at like the new faces of Hollywood. Scooby-D franchise is going to be massive. That's going to be one that happens over and over again. A live action? Yeah. I haven't even heard of it. I have an idea by the way. What? Like bone-chillingly brilliant.

53:27What? Remind me that I have an idea. Like look at these people. I have no idea. That's what Kenny Grace, I don't know any of the other, the second from the top is what Kenny Grace. But like look at them. They look like Scooby-Doo. Yeah, I have not seen anything about this. Well, they're like, young, young, young, young, young. Yeah. That makes sense. That almost seems to be about six years old. Like not a day over. Can we just see, I'm just curious, 18. Okay. The imagery showcased. I agree. She's six. We always talk about, well, we talked about it before, but it is crazy that you legally can't start working a job until you're, like in some states, like 16, but like child actors like start pumping out millions of dollars of work at like 11. Definitely controversial history. Oh, absolutely. I know who was, uh, Stavros was on Drew Barrymore show, like interviewing her and was like,

54:30when did you start working? She's like 11 months old. Yeah, that's, it's pretty crazy. Whoa. She's, she deserves a day-to-day talk show. You know, when you hear my live action idea, yeah, we do so many live actions. It's so good. Rock are you ready? What? Yes. Hold on to your bridges. Holding. Where's Waldo live action? Thanks. And there's a deeper story here like, I'm finding himself. Yeah. That's good. Why has no one written that? Stop. Please don't want to do it. Like, I'm busy right now, but like keep in mind I cleared my schedule for the rest of the year for dancing with the stars, assuming I would make it that long and still we're here still. But like if I get off, I'm going to have so much time and I would love to do this project. Please don't take it from me. As an act of good faith. As an act of good faith. Like verbal trademark. I would like to write the world's Waldo. If I could say it, where's Waldo live action? I want that. Please. Thank you. Or if you're going to do it, can I just like be a part of it? Thanks.

55:30Where's Waldo? It's time. Everyone's looking for me while I was looking for myself. Oh my God. That's an amazing tagline. He had no arms or legs. He couldn't see here or speak. This is how he let a nation. Is that about Mr. Potato? Now that was a quote from the office. Oh. The office. Yeah, you do. I really do. Can I say, can I tell you something? You may. I saved a TikTok for you. You don't have to ask me for a mission to tell me something. Well, you were just about to open your mouth. So I just wanted to get in there first. Well, when a woman speaks, I shut up and I sit down and I was. I saved a TikTok for you called Craziest Overlapse in History. Yeah. Oh, book, thank you. Because it's like things that were happening at the same time in different parts of the world that you just never would have thought were in the same time period. Love this bullshit. Ready? Yeah. George Washington didn't know dinosaurs existed because the first recording of a fossil was years later. That one doesn't really do it for me.

56:31Righted on a scale of one to ten. I'm soft. Okay. This doesn't do it for me at all. Ancient Egyptians lasted so long that ancient Egyptians had their own historians studying their own ancient history. Ooh, not so ancient, are we? Yeah. Okay. I don't care. This one is great. Okay. I like it. Samarized cowboys and the Victorian era all existed at the same time. That I love. That's kind of like a mind F. And I think that would be another good like meeting if there was a show about that. Like that's good TV. I think the person that wrote maybe like Westworld, that one's just also good show. I'd love to see that come back. Or like Yellowstone could do like a samurai meeting a cowboy because that like doesn't. And then like a Victorian. Yeah. All three of them existed at the same time. That is weird. And they had no forms of education. Another good bug or movie. Yeah. Yeah, they probably didn't know the other existed. No. I'm sure they did. Okay. Well Harvard University was already teaching students in 1636.

57:31The golden age of piracy was just beginning. So you could be a student at Harvard and across the pond there were pirates. Or you could drop out of school to be a pirate. You could drop out of school to be a pirate. Wow. Imagine like your parents being like, yeah, our son dropped out of school. We're really worried about him. What did he? Is he like doing drugs? No, he's a pirate. Similarly, you could have dropped out of Oxford University in 1325 to be a member of the Aztec Empire. Oxford University was already teaching students before the Aztec Empire was even founded in 1325. What? Isn't that crazy? So they weren't learning about the Aztecs and because the Aztecs were learning about themselves. Like Waldo? Exactly. Like Waldo. This one's beyond to me. The last execution by Guillotine in France happened in 1977. The same year the first Star Wars movie was released.

58:33Like be heading. Like someone's head was to the floorboards. Via Guillotine. Via the Guillotine. Wow. While Star Wars was blasting out theaters. Oh, wow. With Carrie and Fisher. Carrie, just Carrie Fisher. Oh, I'm bringing lunch. Yeah. Okay. Well, I was confused for a second too. Coca-Cola was invented while the Ottoman Empire was still functioning. I don't know what the Ottoman is. I was literally going to ask you like, do the best you can to describe the Ottoman Empire. My feet would have nowhere to sit without them. Gun in my purse, your head. That's the Ottoman Empire. Wish them the best. I have another Ottoman Empire, unfortunately. But this is, there's something here. The Ottoman Empire was still a functioning world power when the first tax machine was patented in 1843. That one doesn't like what I've worked. Tax machine. Facts that I say, facts.

59:34Facts is to me. I'm like, that seems more high tech than like an iPhone. Me too. That's crazy. Same with record players. And like these things that are now like archaic actually seems to be more complex to me. How did you do that? Then an iPad. Yeah. What do you mean this needle and these ridges are playing a song? What do you mean this needle? What do you mean this? Well, I did use to think a fact machine was transporting the same piece of paper like teleportation. But like, what do you mean? What do you mean? Yeah. That's why I could never be sent back to the past because I'd be like, we have facts machines. Like I had to, and I'd be like, I don't know. And then they would like tie stones to my feet and throw me in the lake. Just like, say. Might even be headed. You ready for the last one? Oxford University had been open for over 400 years before anybody in Europe even knew what a potato was. I didn't even know there was like, that was like, the world existed without potatoes for so long. I mean, like, I wouldn't look at a potato and be like, we could eat that.

1:00:34I'd be like, throw it. Throw it at the end. You would try anything, I think. If you eat a raw potato, you could die. I think you do die. No. You made that up. Did I? I think so. But let's see. I mean, maybe in the same way that like anything raw could. You should avoid eating raw potatoes because they're hard to digest. Maybe if you choked on it. Yeah. Can you die for eating? Raw potatoes can theoretically kill you in rare cases, but it's extremely uncommon. Okay. I would avoid it. Yep. You know, when I hear a crazy thing that I also made up in my head, I thought at midnight, Cinderella was going to die if she didn't make it home. I didn't know her dress just turned ugly. Yeah. I guess her dress turned ugly, she backed her normal clothes, her pumpkin chariot, poofed away. Just everything went back the way it was. I think it's like, you know, in the movies where it's like the girl takes off her glasses

1:01:37and she's hot. I think that's the same with Cinderella is like if she had poofed in front of the prints, he would have been like, ew, what the fuck? I think that's what they were like wanting us to believe. What a sad world we've raised our young women on about you need to get all that's materialistic things to it. All of that. But honestly, the Prince loved her no matter what. Yeah. I don't remember the end. I just remember being very stressed that she would get. I was like, I'm going to get a slipper, frickin' fit. Well, the slipper was still there. Glass slipper. Can you imagine having glass slippers on? Oof. Hey, if the dress poofed away, why did the slipper there? Why was the slipper still there? Can we confirm the dress just disappeared into the thin air? Or did she take it off? Two n' lot holes in this. I got a bone to pick. If the dress poofed into the thin air, this is a serious problem. So, this is a problem. This is a problem to me. And so, what about the, did she have the other glass slipper?

1:02:42What is she sp- Why didn't Cinderella's glass slipper morph back to her ugly face? Also, like, is she returning her newly ordered with one glass slipper? She's going to be in deep due due. Cinderella's glass slippers did not disappear midnight because they were conjured from pure magic rather than transformed from an existing object. Bull. I'm not a cobble. Okay, there's a lot of information on this transformation versus creation. Kind of, like, I kind of do get that. Yeah, that makes total sense. Okay, gotcha. They figured out, they did figure it out. Many interpretations also suggest that Fairy Godmother intentionally left the magical slippers behind as a permanent gift to Cinderella and the prince could find each other again. Ooh, chills. Did you ever see the brandy version of Cinderella? No. That's the best one we've ever seen. Oh, yes I have. The mic. You ate a chunk. Oh, yeah, I was like full of tune on it for a second. Whoa. Do you have an electric toothbrush? Do you? No. It does make a pretty big difference.

1:03:43Really? Yeah. Hmm. Hmm. I might get one. I will also say, like, because it has the buzzer, like, when the two minutes is up, I didn't realize that before I was only brushing my teeth for, like, eight seconds. Not actually eight, but like two minutes, it feels like forever. Right. Like, compared to how I was doing it with my manual. Two minutes is twice as long as the dance that I did on TV. It's really long. Oh, that's not good. It's a long amount of time to be brushing your teeth. Big toothbrush. How long you supposed to be washing your hands for? Two happy birthdays. Twenty seconds? Okay, I mean. I'm still here, innit? Yep. Uh. Ballad Point. Yeah. No, I love washing my hands. I wash it a lot. So? I'm going to get a lecture toothbrush. I get these bamboo toothbrushes in, like, eight packs, and then I use them until I feel like they're probably on their way out in terms of putting them into my mouth. And then I toss them because they're biodegradable. Did you see the new Dyson toothbrush?

1:04:44Yeah. That's what I was asking you about, because I saw it on sale today. Well, I've, I have a friend. I have a friend who used the Dyson toothbrush and said that her fillups toothbrush, that electric, regular electric toothbrushes better. I think they might have done too much with the Dyson. I'm embarrassed that at one point in my life I got the automatic toothbrush thing from an ad on Instagram, and I was like, this will make my life easier. But did it work? No. Like, why don't we have one of those that work? No, but like, why was I trying to get something easier for my two minutes of brush? No, I, the absolutely you should try. Like, I would, that, I would pay a lot of money for it and easier way to brush my teeth. Are you flossing? Not as much as I should, but I do carry around those teeth, floss or teeth, things that my car and stuff. You could, you could find my actual physical location by the amount that fall on the ground from my pocket or my backpack or something. I like those. Yeah. People going to, Connor was here because there's like little floss or something. Yes. I feel bad.

1:05:44I'm not littering on purpose. I hate littering, litter bug. Okay. Well, let's wrap up because I have my legs crossed for a reason. Connor. Yeah. So I'll release you Cinderella before you poof in your chair. Very good. And thank you. Thank you. Before you put in your chair. Thank you guys for listening and we will see you in the bonus. If you want to come. And is there still a code or no? The code to the bonus now is Papa. Papa for free month of bonus episodes. DMGCDU is.tv and you'll find Broken Connor. Make a podcast. It's, I think it's pretty easy once you get there. You'll figure it out. And then next week we got the Rumba on Thanks for the Stars. Please vote if you don't mind. That would be me and a lot and I will show up as a lady man for you, baby. Good night. This week I'm close friends. I want a party with Dakota and I'll, you will. Oh, I want a party with the fan. You will.

1:06:45I want to go to Miami with the fannings. Okay. So what happens? I'm in a different case, they're making the mosquitoes gay. Oh, brother. Octopussy. Is that a James Bond movie? There's a lot of James Bond stuff happening. Oh, fabulous. Broke you need this on a tote bag. Sign up on tmgsutus.tv to watch the full bonus episode.