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About this Episode
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Trump is some kind of clown. On that much all serious people can agree.
But is he a benign clown or an evil clown? Compared to the cartoonishly evil Benjamin “you were supposed to laugh” Netanyahu, Trump seems relatively harmless. His fans appreciate Orangeman’s efforts to get immigration under control. They applaud his ostensible attempts, even if mostly rhetorical, to extricate America from forever wars. Even his destabilization of the world, and its US imperial lynchpin, strikes many observers as a good thing. Alex Krainer actually thinks there is a method to Trump’s madness.
Be that as it may, the last week of September 2025 may go down in history as the week the Trump clown show crashed and burned. The highlight, or lowlight, occurred at the United Nations. He arrived at the UN and the escalator didn’t work. (What is it about Trump and escalators?) Then his teleprompter malfunctioned and his audio went haywire. Now he’s demanding that the UN investigate what he calls “triple sabotage.”
But the teleprompter wasn’t working for only the first few minutes. Trump’s speech didn’t get any better after it came back on.
Trump’s genius for insulting foreign leaders recalls that of another legendary clownish autocrat, Rufus T. Firefly of Fredonia.
Unfortunately, Erdogan didn’t stand up, slap Trump in the face, and announce “this means war!” But after being publicly humiliated like that, the Grand Turk obviously isn’t going to take Trump’s advice and stop buying Russian oil.
And speaking of Russia…Trump’s “this means war” moment this week came when he suddenly and unexpectedly announced that Ukraine can win back all the territory it has lost to Russia—then added that Ukraine could “maybe even go further than that.” Like, all the way to Moscow?
“Find the back door to the Kremlin/kick it down and walk on in/must go must go must go to Moscow.” -John Cale
Midget king Zelensky has almost run out of cannon fodder, so it’s unlikely he’ll be following in the footsteps of another ambitious little guy, Napoleon, and marching on Moscow. But Trump’s crazy clownery may have concealed a covert green light for Ukraine to expand its drone strikes deep inside Russia. “OK,” Trump seems to be saying, “go ahead and do your worst to Russia, maybe you and your EU backers will bring Putin to his knees.” And as that message was being delivered, a series of bizarre “RFO” (Russian Flying Object) provocations erupted over NATO skies, with “four nations threatened in two weeks.” So although Trump’s escalator may not be working, his escalation is doing just fine.
Ominously, as Trump was threatening Russia with a fate it would blow up the world to avoid, while European poodles were yipping and chafing at their muzzles, something genuinely frightening happened: America’s Secretary of Defense, Armageddonite fanatic Pete Hegseth—the worst possible person to be in charge of thousands of nuclear warheads—summoned every general and admiral to an in-person meeting in Quantico, Virginia, this Tuesday, September 30. Nobody seems to know what’s up. The Economic Times thinks America is going to war. I satirically suggested Hegseth was getting ready for the Rapture. The Guardian thinks Hegseth is about to give many of America’s top officers the axe. Watch out when Hegseth starts tossing axes around!
While it’s unlikely that Hegseth will announce to his assembled generals that Vladimir Putin has been secretly sapping Americans’ precious bodily fluids which has unfortunately necessitated a massive nuclear missile launch, or that all officers be required to cut themselves with axes and swear a blood oath to newly-annointed American Fuhrer Donald J. Trump (and then invade Portland and gas the libs) one never really knows what this erratic Administration might do.
The erratic, clownish quality of Trump’s leadership ultimately makes it hard for the world to take America seriously. Just this week, the entire Middle East basically stood up and left the American security umbrella, due to Trump’s letting Israel attack Qatar. (If American security guarantees to Qatar, one of our closest allies and host to a huge US military base, can’t be trusted, what American security guarantees can you trust?) Now Saudi Arabia has signed a nuclear-locked-and-loaded mutual defense pact with Pakistan, and the rest of the region is desperately scrambling in the general direction of China. Nobody is worried about the mythical “Iranian threat” any more. Instead, they’re all moving to mend fences with Tehran, whose belief that the Zionist-occupied US is the real enemy of the region is now acknowledged to have been right all along.
So he’s lost the Middle East. He’s lost the trade war to China. He’s lost Ukraine to Russia, barring Hegsethian armageddon. Thanks to his looney on-again-off-again tarrifs, the next big financial crisis is brewing and the stock market is likely to crash. Get ready for the globalist billionaire oligarchs to try to blame the chaos on “populism” and the free internet that enabled it, and propose solutions that will make Cass Sunstein’s seem kind and gentle by comparison. But if we’re lucky, the collapse will take down the whole Western bankster empire that gives those oligarchs their power, so nobody will have to listen to them any more.
However it shakes out, as Trump’s amusingly embarrassing reality-show presidency implodes, the world will eventually have to stop rolling on the floor laughing and get up and get on with life in a post-US-empire world.
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