Armchair Anonymous: Bad Customer

0:00Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Shepherd and I'm joined by Monica Batman. Hi there. Today we have a lot of stories, foreign facts, of bad, bad customers, naughty customers. Bad customer. I regret not making the prompt naughty customers as opposed to bad book, because in fact one of these people is very, very naughty. Deviant, I would say. We could have done deviant customers. So, happy. Okay. Okay. Creepy. People have really dealt with a lot of stuff, you know. Yeah, it's hard to be in customer service. It's a beat down. It's a beat down. It's probably one notch under the nurses, what they're dealing with, right? Oh, it's true, it's true. Yeah. Okay, please enjoy naughty bad customers. We get support from Quince. You know what I think about a lot? The stuff in my closet, I actually wear. Like, not the trendy pieces. The sweater that goes with everything or the pants that fit perfectly. The Tee, you kind of just throw on without even thinking. That's what Quince does. They make those pieces. That's right. They have 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters starting at $60.

1:05Organic cotton, marina wool, quality you'd expect from a luxury brand. Luxury without the luxury price tag. We love that. They skip the middlemen, go direct to ethical factories and pass those savings to you. We're talking 50 to 80% less than similar brands. I'm so excited for fall. Simply because I love my cashmere sweaters from Quince. And I also got to add that right before I left Nashville, I was assigned the task of putting all the bedding back on my children's bed. And I got to fold first the Quince sheets and a comforter, then unfolded them and put them in the entire time I was spreading it all out. I was like, by God, they really are so soft. It's crazy. They are. I also have a pair of sheets from Quince that are really, really good. And honestly, what sets Quince apart is that everything feels intentional. These are timeless, versatile pieces designed to be the dependable stuff you reach for day after day. You're not buying something just for right now. You're buying something that's going to be in your rotation for years. They've also got hotel quality bedding and bath, kitchen essentials, even furniture. So if you're doing any kind of refresh at home too, same quality, same prices across

2:07the board. Quince just gets it. Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app exclusive offers or go to quince.com slash dax. Get free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK too. That's q-u-i-n-c-e.com slash dax. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Honestly, if I could just flip a switch overnight and be better at one thing, I'd want to be better at handling stress in a healthier way, like not letting the small stuff snowball into this whole thing where I'm tense for the rest of the day over something that didn't even matter. It came to mind immediately because I know I do it. Someone cuts me off in traffic and somehow I'm still thinking about it at dinner. Two seconds, that's all it was. So yeah, that's what I'm working on. And that's where BetterHelp comes in. You know how I feel about therapy. It's just necessary. In fact, sometimes I know I'm not supposed to say this, I judge you if you never tried it. Better is a feeling defined by you.

3:09And for BetterHelp, it's a BetterHelp therapist who really gets you. It's a focus on global, emotional, well-being with thousands of therapists and millions of members in over 100 countries. It's progress. And it's getting better at letting the small stuff stay small. That's my better. Sign up and get 10% off at BetterHelp.com slash DAX. That's BetterHELP.com slash DAX. Hello. Hello. Already upon accent on the table. I'm from the UK. Oh, wonderful. Whereabouts? Manchester. Oh, wow. You love Manchester DAX. Wow, I love Jenny. And Jenny here. Well, I love Jenny here. With someone from Manchester and he loves it.

4:11It's definitely opened my heart to Manchester for sure. There's a bit of a competition between the Northerners and the southerners in the UK and I'm team northern. I'm glad to hear that standard with North and South because Northern Californians hate Southern Californians. But we love them. And generally Northern NERS hate southerners in the United States. Yes, there's obviously a very historic North South issue in the US. So you're from Manchester. Have you ever left? Yes, I'm only visiting Manchester this time. So I live in Singapore. Oh, my goodness. Holy smokes. What are you doing in Singapore? I actually run a recruitment company for the shipping industry, for the maritime industry. So it's my own company. I actually set up this year. So it's been an exciting year. Congratulations. That's a big deal. Will you be a spectator at the Formula One race that's coming in a few weeks? Oh, yes. And we go every year. There's one in Singapore? Yeah, not only is there one in Singapore, but my dream is if you stay at that hotel with

5:14the weird boat on top, you can be in the pool and watch the race. Cool. It's a really cool weekend. The vibe is amazing. It's very busy, but it's a fabulous weekend. We don't miss it. And if you stayed at that place, what's it called like the Marina Bay or something? Marina Bay, Sans. I haven't stayed there, but you can visit. And they've got a lovely cocktail bar on the top floor with an amazing view. So you can see the whole of the track pretty much from that bar. It's pretty amazing. Now that's amazing. My mom is dying to go to Singapore. Oh, yeah. It's been on her list as long as I can. I went in 99, but I think it's changed quite a bit. I've lived there for eight years now. And even in those eight years, it's almost unrecognizable. It's changed so much. There's so much building work. It's progressed so much. It's a really very popular destination now to live, to visit. OK, so you have a bad customer story. I do. So this does take place in the UK.

6:15It takes place in 2014. I was living and working in London at the time. And I was working in a West End theatre, one that showed Mamma Mia. So just to set the scene a little bit, three things that you should know about the story coming up. First of all, it takes place in the summer holidays. So the theatre that I worked in had a deal for one month of the summer holidays, where one child goes free per one paying adult. So that month is always crazy. There's loads of kids in the matinee shows. It's a very family friendly show, Mamma Mia. The second thing to note is that it is also very popular the matinee show with hen parties, Bachelor at parties. Oh, I love that. I've never heard that. Yeah, I like hen parties. Me too. Particularly Mamma Mia, you know, it's a fun show. And it sets the day up nicely. And the third thing is that this theatre is about 1,100 seat capacity.

7:17So it's not huge, but it's not tiny. And most of those 1,100 people turn up to the theatre 15 minutes before the show starts. The last 15 minutes before the show starts is Mayhem. You're having to make some quick assessments on people. You're looking out for trouble customers. You're looking out for nice customers and seeing what's going to be happening throughout the next 2 hours show. And what are some of the red flags when you're looking for a bad customer? An e-briation, is that on the table? It's high on the list. An e-briation is probably the number one the way they're looking for at the stage. Well, sometimes like your wife drags you to the play, you're on vacation, and you're like get drunk at the pool. Or you keep thinking you're not going to have to go to this show, but then there you are and you're pretty hammered. Exactly. Okay, we love a bottomless brunch and the matinee starts at 3 p.m. So you have your bottomless brunch, you take your way to the theatre. What a day. It's dicey, let's just say that.

8:17I mean, yeah, it's an amazing day if you're having the day. I just imagine 20% of the audience out cold snoring. Yeah, exactly. Because they're drunk. It's happened. This particular day I am working as an usher in the dress circle. So that's the first layer. You've got the stores, you've got the dress circle. So I'm a nasha. I'm inside the theatre and I have already got a radio call to say I've got a hen party coming to my circle and they have been put on a watch list. Oh my god. So they come in, they're having a lovely time. They're okay so far, but they've each got a couple of glasses of wine with them as well that they've been allowed to bring into the theatre. That was maybe the first bad choice of the day. That was the theatre, but we'll look past that. And we get them settled in their seats and they're having a lovely time. So I'm seating other patrons and I look over and they have managed to sneak in an inflatable penis which they have now blown up.

9:18Oh boy. I mean, it's not huge, but it's noticeable. And they're now waving it around. There's a lot of kids around. It's a matinee show in the summer holidays. It's very funny. I'm laughing as well. I'm trying to hold it together and I ask them very politely, can you please pass me the penis? Sure. They start to pass it down the row and they drop it and it's a dead end. That was in quotes for the listener. The penis proceeds to bounce down the rows. Oh boy. And it bounces all the way down to the stalls, the level below. So we've got a penis falling from the sky. So that's caused a little bit of a stir, but that's okay. At least now the penis isn't my problem. That's downstairs is problem. The show begins. The ladies start to have a little bit of fun. You know, they're singing along to the music. They are waving and dancing, which you think would be okay at Mamma Mia, but we had a policy of people pay good money to see a western show.

10:21They pay to see the performers sing, not a battery-let party. Sing the songs. I would hate that. So I very politely ask them, please can you not sing anymore? That's part of the policy. You know, we don't allow singing and dancing throughout the show. So they quiet down a little bit, but then they get more and more drunk with their wine, they're having a great time. And by halfway through the first act I'm having to call security. It's getting a little bit too much and people around them are complaining. The policy is that we wouldn't kick them out in the middle of an act. It's too disruptive to the whole theatre. So the dancers will just come and stand next to the row and look a little bit menacing and they can see that they're being monitored and now they should be behaving. It doesn't stop. So the decision is made that at the interval they're going to be told, they're not allowed to re-enter the show. They will be asked to leave the theatre. The interval happens. They come out of the seats. They go to the bar where they are refused service.

11:24The front of house manager says to them very calmly, we've had some complaints. You're not meeting our policies and now you will not be allowed to re-enter. An argument in Sioux's of course, they are really kicking off at this point. They're shouting, they're swearing, there's a lot of things going on. It's the middle of the interval. And so the big dog is called in. The theatre manager comes down from her office. Now my theatre manager is amazing. She's very calm. She's very stoic. She doesn't take shit from anybody. I would listen to her. She scares me. So she comes down and she has a calm conversation with them and she manages to get the situation under control. As this has been going on, the second half of the show has now resumed. But there's still this discussion happening in the foyer of the theatre. The ladies are very upset obviously. They want to be allowed back in or a minimum they would like a refund, which is never going to happen. Right. Things very quickly start to escalate again. Oh boy.

12:24And they become even more irate. It's notching up, you know, to maybe an eight out of ten on the beauty scale at this point. And so a decision is made to call the police because at this time it's now been about 30 minutes of them arguing. Once we tell them we will be calling the police to remove them from the theatre, it's a group of five women, three of them leave. They decide we're not getting mixed up with the police. We're going to leave calmly. However, the last two women, they want to make a point. They're not leaving. One of the women decides to pull down her trousers. Oh, here we go. Here we go. And do a poo in the middle of the foyer of the theatre. No. Oh, okay. I thought a pee was coming out of way. Me too. Me too. But she was like, no, I'm going full, Tonka. I'm full. Number two. Oh my gosh. Your theater manager who sounds like Tom Hardy. That's her vibe. Like it gets scarier the quieter she gets. What is her reaction to the poop in the theatre?

13:26She's very calm. Actually, throughout the whole thing, she's saying, madam, please, I think I know what's going to happen now. If you could please pull your trousers back up. If you do need to use the toilet, we do have a toilet. We can facilitate that. First of all, congrats to her that she had one in the chamber that she could just pull the trigger on that quickly when she got angry now. She got herself excited about the cops. But can you imagine me pissing going, you know what, I'm going to fucking shit right here. And what are the odds that you would be prepared at that moment to actually? So much wine. Okay, so she maybe has been holding her hair. She's been drinking all day. Okay. Wine can sometimes get things moving. Wine can have that effect on people. Luce, yeah, exactly Monica. And so in the end, after she's done the poo, she pulls her trousers up without wiping. Oh, yeah, I was thinking she took her sock off. That's the best move. And walks out of the theater with her friend like nothing ever happened.

14:30And that was that the cops never they didn't arrive in time. We're in a theater that people won't leave. We're not high upon their list on that Saturday afternoon. So they never arrived in time. They ended up being called off because the woman decided to leave. She did her business and she left. Whose job was it to then handle that? An obduty. The theater manager. She was a believer or if I would never ask you to do something that I wouldn't be prepared to do myself. Oh, God. Did you stick around in watch? She got her rubber gloves on. We were all watching. Oh, yes, I'm like, I would ask for two paper plates from the concession stand. And I would have tried to, you know, you're kind of imagining it as like dog poop. That's right. Yeah, this is human wine poop. Was it real Luce? Not to get too. Did she need a mop or a paper plush? Luce, Luce. Okay. This theater full of children and a grown-ass woman is pooping on the floor.

15:30First of all, I'm very sorry for you and the staff there. No one should have to deal with that. But I do wonder if this story came up during like the rehearsal dinner speeches. This person is vile as she is likely a legend now in her circle. Oh, come on. Like, remember the time Betty dumped at the West End theater? And she never broke eye contact with the scary manager. Like, she's most certainly a legend in her circle. But she wasn't the bride, right? Do we know? The bride had a sash saying bride. And then the rest of them had a sash saying team bride. The bride left when the mention of the police, she hot-footed out there. Oh, my God. What is a bachelor party called a rooster party? Cock party. A stuck do. Oh, okay. I have made some observations. Certainly men get really naughty on these bachelor parties. That's well documented. And I don't forgive them. But I mostly privy to these hen parties that come through Nashville. I have to say I have observed the intoxication level is harder and quicker and earlier in the day.

16:37You guys agree? Because it's an all-day affair. Oh, okay. I'm going to say the evening and then the next day, hopefully, with your death of the weekend. They can get pretty wild. I mean, I know the men's parties are notorious, but the women's can get pretty wild as well, I think. It's comforting that all people behave like animals. Different kinds of animals, but yeah. Yeah, animals just the same. Wow, Amy, what a great punchline. I thought maybe a fight was going to be the punchline, but the fact that she just hold her slide, not even a dress slacks. Like, that takes a minute to get down. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. And I got to imagine you were just immediately excited to tell your five best friends when you got off work. Oh, everybody was called WhatsApp groups were messaged and it went down in history in the theatre. We saw a lot of stuff in the theatre, but I think that was probably one of the worst things. Wow. That's great. That's great. I'm so glad you witnessed that and were able to tell us about it.

17:37I know. It made a good story. Amy, it's so nice meeting you. Thank you guys too. I really appreciate the time and lovely to me, both. All right. We'll enjoy your trip home. Thank you. Have a great day. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. We get support from YouTube Premium. Okay. I got to tell you something. I just got YouTube Premium this year. It's completely enhanced. How I use YouTube. I already liked YouTube for obvious reasons. Yes. I've watched all my cars stuff on there. Everything. Everything's on there. And thought, how could YouTube get any better? Well, Premium has awesome features like offline downloads. Just use it on a plane ride. So I can download my favorite automotive shows and videos to watch when I'm on the go. And that means I don't have to wait when I don't have Wi-Fi, which is especially great when I'm traveling and don't have guaranteed Wi-Fi on airplanes. Speaking of not waiting, and this is my favorite part, YouTube Premium is ad-free. So I can watch uninterrupted, whenever, wherever.

18:39Background play also comes in clutch because I can lock my screen and keep the audio going. This comes in handy when I go out for a walk or when I'm in the middle of a great podcast. Plus, it has a ton of other features I didn't even know about. Like, did you know? Premium automatically downloads videos from channels you subscribe to. So even when I forget, my content is still right there for me. So if you're like me and you already like YouTube, you're going to love YouTube Premium. Try it now for two months free. Trial eligibility varies. Terms apply, cancel anytime. We get support from superhuman. I'm someone who wants to do big meaningful work, but the small stuff eats up my day before I even get to it. The endless emails, docs, scheduling, follow-ups that pile up. By the time all that's cleared, there's no energy left for the ambitious stuff. Most AI tools promise to fix that, but they require opening a new tab, re-explaining everything from scratch every single time. A week later, it's just another thing collecting dust in the browser.

19:40Superhuman from the makers of Grammarly is different. It's already embedded inside the tools people are using, email docs, browser. It's not waiting to be found, it's already there. Working alongside, clearing what's in the way, so the focus stays on what's actually we're doing. A thought partner that's already up to speed, no catching it up. It knows the style, the workflows, and it backs people up without getting in the way. At your service, not after your job. That's the difference. Give it a try for yourself. Start streamlining your workflows with superhuman. Try today at superhuman.com. We get support from Zippercruda. Oh, get recruitin' out. Bow! What I love when someone shows up in a way you didn't expect. Like, I've had people come up to me out in public and pitch themselves for a job on the pot. No email, no formal application, just pure confidence and conviction. And honestly, I respect it. When you're hiring, it's always helpful to know who really wants the job.

20:40But you don't need unusual stunts. You just need Zippercruder. On Zippercruder, qualified candidates can add a personal note to tell you why they're interested in your job. So you see the most motivated people right away. And Zippercruder has a new feature that shows you the most interested qualified candidates first. So you meet the right people faster. And right now, you can try it for free at zippercruder.com slash dax. And with Zippercruder's powerful matching technology, qualified candidates find you fast. No wonder they're the number one rated hiring site based on G2. Zippercruder makes it easy for amazing candidates to get your attention. Four out of five employers who post on Zippercruder get a quality candidate within the first day. Try it for free today at zippercruder.com slash dax. That's zippercruder.com slash dax. Meet your match on Zippercruder. Prrp ampaaad out, wooooow! This message is brought to you by Apple Card. It's a new school year, which means yet another back to school shopping list.

21:40Luckily, when you use your Apple Card, you can earn 3% daily cash back on everything at Apple, including the new iPad Air and the MacBook Pro. Apply for Apple Card today and unlock the tools for a productive school year. Subject to Credit Approval. Apple Card is issued by Goldman Sachs Bank USA, Salt Lake City Branch, terms and more at AppleCard.com. Alex. We don't want to start off with an uh-uh. We're in a matching fabric chair. I'm in my daughter's room. Yeah, it's kind of a fake lamb wool sit. They call that like boo. Be you. Bukaki. No, I forget. You can only target. I also pay. Tarje target. Where are you at, Alex? I'm in San Jose, California. Good old Silicon Valley. Close to the shark tank. 10 minutes from there. I had a famous poop there and you know there's a little park.

22:42Just well our last color and pulp the poop. There's a little park immediately to the right of the shark tank and it has a little public bathroom which is great and I had been working there all day long when I worked for GM. All of a sudden I was like, oh, I got to go and I ran across that park and I got there and they had closed that bathroom for the night. But I had already told my body we are seconds away from deploying. Oh my god. And then I had to bounce into the woods right next to the park. And when I saw next to me remember the story, the sim provided me a huge bag of cotton balls someone left out there. And that's how I cleaned up. Great to meet you Alex. You too. And that's not what we call it. And in San Jose, by the way, I saw many other deposits while I was in that park. Oh, I hope you left a bag of cotton balls too. It's like you take one you leave. I didn't use them all. There's plenty of you just go back later. So Alex, you have a bad customer story. Yeah. The saying we have is you remember the good ones but you never forget the bad ones. Well, I'm a flooring contractor.

23:43So if you're remodeling your house, I'll sneak hardwood or selling the carpet. You come to our showroom. We want an indiana measure. Get installers there. So we're mom and pop shop. I just started. This is my first month pretty much. How long ago was this? Almost 10 years ago. Okay. Okay. Fresh out of college just starting. Trying to make that proud. Show my got the juice like pops does. Sure. Sure. The customer comes in. Nice Asian lady. All these 65, 5 foot tall. I noticed she's very religious. Very touchy. Oh, kind of split taches. Wait, why did you think she was religious? Was she wearing like a cross or something? Cross and right away. Today's a blessed day. Oh, got it. Okay. Don't you think God's blessed us all? Oh, wow. And that's all fun. But that's not really, you know, me as Cedera says when they say have a blessed day, he feels like he's sprayed by God juice. Oh, yeah. Whatever floats your boat, right? Yeah. And sales you kind of go with the flow. I'm helping her through this showroom looking at stuff. And I noticed she's kind of very flirtatious.

24:43And I'll razzle dazzle. I'll shake and bake to get a sale and entertain it. Yeah. So that's kind of the point she's starting to touch your arm. Do you work out? You're so stern and yet. Oh, so far I like this. Yeah, this is fun. When you first start off in sales too, at least in this industry, you don't know what you're doing. You don't know what's right from wrong. You're just trying to people please. So the biggest thing I noticed too is when she leaves, she gives me a big hug, which is not really calm. And it says I cannot wait to see you like when I come to her house. Oh, wow. A week later, I'm about to go. She shoots me a text the night before saying I cannot wait to see you with a heart emoji. Oh, wow. Can I ask did she order carpet or hardwood? What was she in the market for? She didn't pick yet, but she did end up picking. It's called an LVP if you've heard of it. Kind of a synthetic plastic. That's a little cheaper. Looks like wood. I'm on my way there. Super nervous. You have no idea what to expect. I don't know the answers to their questions. Right. When you pull up, you're like, this place is fucked up.

25:43Oh, shit everywhere in the front. Oh, no. They have multiple crosses in Jesus statues. She opens the door and right away a few things are off. Right away you smell, right? You smell a hoard smell from the house. Ooh, okay. Wearing a revealing tank top, red lipstick matching her tank top with big tails, kind of like Britney Spears. Oh, she got like a character. Oh, she's got like a character. And then she does her heartache like welcome in. And gives me a huge hug. I was prepared. The ass out hug. She doesn't. She goes like full in grasping. And then I look behind her. There's a ginormous man. I'm talking like six, eight, three hundred plus pounds. And he's just smiling. What's his name? Probably about 40. Wow. So are you quickly trying to figure out is this son or young lover? What's the dynamic? What the hell's going on here? What is this relationship? Have you seen mine hunt her at all? No. It's serial killer, profiler. Looks like the worst sounds like him.

26:44He's very monotone. So he goes, Alex, it's so good to finally meet you. I've heard a lot about you. Oh, everything's red flags. Yeah. Shakes my hand. I've never felt something so feminine yet masculine. So he almost shook it as if he was a queen. And I'm supposed to kind of kiss his hand. But then turn it into the hardest shake of my life. So as a guy, I was like, I think he's telling me he thinks I'm cute, but also letting me know he's so big. I can't do anything about a lot of subtext to the handset. This message is. Yeah. Before I could comprehend this dynamic, I turn and I realized this house is full on hoarders. There's going to need a crew in there for a week before you're talking about flooring. They need a hazmat group rest to just do the job. Again, first time trying to get a sail, you kind of push this all out of the way. I'm a big dad proud today, you know? Yeah. Then I knew it was immediately off when they started holding hands. I don't know if you've ever had a plumber or someone over your house.

27:44You're not going to call your wife kind of hit on the guy and hold hands two feet away and walk the house. So I'm measuring small clock. Hey, how long have you been here? All these things. Within minutes, the big guy goes, How much is this going to cost? I'm here to figure that out for you, brother. Figure 10, 15 grand, you know? But we'll see. He goes, OK, we're going to go discuss this privately. That's awkward, right? So kickers, they walk about three feet away as if it's private. I could still clearly see you and hear you. And a lot of little giggling kind of goes on. This is so great. This is a good chance for me to get going on the measurement. I could get this house done without talking to them. So I keep sharing them flirt and the picture is, remember, this guy is almost seven foot and she's five foot. Wow. And there's about a 30 to 40 year gap. So I thought it might be her son, who's goofy. But I'm starting to realize, nope, I'm thinking they're lovers. OK, the hand holding.

28:44I get back to where they're standing. He has his finger on our chin. Like he's about to kiss her like in a romantic movie. Yeah. And then they're just like whispering. And he gives her like a little two finger kind of slap. Oh, I'm kind of loving it. I'm like, this is awesome. This is a good story. And then he winds up and gives her a nice like, oh, like a little slap. A little slap. OK. Oh my goodness. She's like looking into his eyes and love. And I kid you not as I walk by you hear you like that. Don't you? Oh my goodness. I think I need to get out of here. Maybe. So I continue my measurement. These people, by the way, would appear and disappear. So I'm walking out of nowhere. You're kind of like, oh, shit. Or right there by your shoulder. And they start asking me questions. Don't ask a contractor like, hey, are you single? What's your partner like? Do you guys like to go out and have fun and drink? Hey, I'm on here right now. So I'm at this point rushing. And I'm like, kind of sweating. Yeah. Let's get the hell out of here. Last room's the master. As I'm about to open it, the little lady jumps in front of me

29:47and says, oh, we're not going to go in there right now. Oh, right now. This was the creepiest part. The guys smiling at me and goes, at least not yet. Oh, yeah. You're like, yo, this is the weirdest scenario I've been in. How do they find each other? What a match made in heaven. They met at church. And then they would ask me if I could go to church. They even asked me if I would go to one of their church events and that a group of people hang out after. So my mind's like, I'm not trying to judge a book by a cover. But I think we got a weird swinger. Yes. Swingerie, I think going on here. Just the basics, right? Well, shaking bake. I wonder what was in that bedroom. A dead plumber. Maybe. Probably a swing said. Sure. And in mind, there's Jesus stuff everywhere. A shrine of Jesus candles, just everything. Or Jesus. I'm sad he had to witness this. I told him during our discussion how I pulled my back the first day.

30:49I don't know if you guys have ever pulled your back. You can't walk. It hurts. So as I'm leaving, they go, please can we pray for your back before you leave? No, thank you. Like I appreciate it. And they're being very persistent. Maybe later if you want. I'm not too religious, but thank you. But in the end, I have, obviously I give in. So I say, what do I do? She says, bow your head and close your eyes. And my mind. Do you when they talk to you? Have you seen obsession yet? Yes. Yeah, girl does a great job and smiles with her eyes wide open. That's what they both did the whole time. So when they go, can we pray? It's more like, can we pray for you? Sure. Normal prayer. After like 30 seconds, I realized they started creeping closer and closer to me. So they went from three feet to feet, one feet. Okay, I'm feeling their breath on me at this point. And I'm not in kidding. I got frozen. I was like, I don't know what to do right now. I look in their heads or right here at my shoulders.

31:49And I feel like their body is touching my body. Their prayer started to get weird. It had nothing to do with God. It was like, give this man the testosterone and strength to prevail. You know, like, what the fuck does that have to do with anything? And then they start rubbing my back. Like, centrally. This guy has a shoe chand. So it's getting real weird. The lady's doing most of the prayer. And the guy would just like, kind of compliment her. And then she was like, give this man the blessings he needs to perform. She would just be like, hmm, to perform. Oh, and then she starts groping me like on my love handles, like kind of squeezing. Sure, she loves it. Holes herself, fuck my shoulder because she's short and starts whispering. I can't understand it. And then I find out she's speaking tongue. Oh, no. Her lips touched my ear as if she's kind of kissing. And then the hairs on my neck go up. I wake up out of this frozen whatever suspended.

32:52And right away I got back to human and went, hey guys, I'm getting the fuck out of here. Yeah. I'm not in this yet. I'm rushing out the front door. You guys kind of chasing me. They have like a little front gate that's half open. I kicked it open, broken. Don't care. I'm getting out of here. Get into my truck. Hey, I'll contact you. Just leave in. And then they sit there on the sidewalk, hand over shoulder, both smiling, waving like happy family as if nothing just happened. So I go back to my showroom and all my older employees are 50, 60, done it for decades. Have an aball making fun of me. This is not normal. You should have left. Right. But the strategy in our job is you could technically fire a customer. So you pretty much just double the price. They're not going to go for it. You say no problem. Everyone's happy. Go both ways. So I did that. And ironically the big kickers they signed up. No.

33:52So I was like, that's not fun. I don't want to do it. Yeah. And so about a month later we go, I four weren't all my installers. Don't take shit. Don't let them touch you. All these things. And there's a lock box and he gets in and he says the house is practically empty. No one's there. No one's living there. No Jesus. There's no nothing. And the odd part is the master bedroom was still locked. This is so weird. I believe someone tried to pull me in a religious sexual three way. And it was my first real measurement of my career. So it's kind of like, can't get much from here, right? Yeah. It's a good first one to have. And you really can navigate everything going forward. Yeah. I got to say, I always felt this way. There becomes a fine line between some of these deeply religious folks in satanic worshipers. Like when you're speaking in tongues and you're you're involved in orgies like, aren't we Satanists and Colt Deaking people's ears.

34:54Oh boy. Wow. So they didn't pay no one installed anything I presume. We installed and she sent a check. Oh my gosh. I never saw her again. And I refused to meet her because she wanted to meet up for coffee so she could give me a deposit. I said, put that bitch in the mail. Yeah. I kept it to like texting calls. I didn't show up. The guy said nothing was there. But we did the job. And about a year later, they called me, I convinced them to do just materials like purchased the materials and we will install. So they purchased the materials and came to the show and picked it up. And it was kind of like the last we ever saw them. They got. Wow. Alex, what an experience. I'm kind of jealous. When you do sales and meet thousands of people, the pros is you meet a lot of people and see how they live, the cons. You meet a lot of people and see how they live. Not everyone's what you think. You get into a house and we've had plenty of issues where someone got killed in a house and they'll told us you go there.

35:56There's 13 dead cats. Oh baby. No one tells you you did show up and you get surprised. I live for this. I think it's awesome as long as you don't get, I guess, kidnapped or hurt. Nothing you can't tell over a drink with a guy's. Oh Alex, what a lovely story. Thank you so much for telling us. Yeah, of course, man. Thanks for having us. My wife and I are big fans. Is she there? Can we say hi to her? Oh, yes, please. She's 38. Look at that. She opens the door right away. Oh. Waiting. Oh, no. Do you know if it's a boy or a girl? Another girl. Oh, that's right. Congratulations. For way to go for sure. Girl dad. Lovely meeting you guys. Congratulations. Thank you. Thanks guys. We appreciate it. Fun experience. All right. Take care. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. We are supported by auto trader. All right.

36:57If you've been putting off car shopping because it sounds like a whole thing, buying your car online on auto trader makes it way easier. Really? You can shop tons of cars online, compare prices, check financing and trade in options all from wherever you are. And if you want to start online and go to the dealership for a test drive, you can do that too. Really, what I like is the flexibility. Start online, finish at the dealer or the other way around. Your info stays with you so you're not starting the process from scratch. Plus you're working with local dealer listings so you've got real people helping behind the scenes. And when you're ready, you can pick up your car or have it delivered. Really? Buy your car online on auto trader. Really? We get support from our sponsor, Lily. For adults with obesity or with excess weight and weight related medical problems, it's time to find out about Fondeo or for Glippron. Fondeo is a once daily prescription GLP1 medicine used with a reduced calorie diet and increased physical activity to help adults with obesity or some adults with overweight

37:57who also have weight related medical problems to lose excess body weight and keep the weight off. Fondeo should not be used with other GLP1 receptor agonist medicines. It is not known if Fondeo is safe and effective for you and children. Don't take Fondeo if you're allergic to it or if you or someone in your family had medialery thyroid cancer or multiple endocrineoplasia syndrome type 2. Stop and call your doctor right away if you have an allergic reaction, a lump or swelling in your neck or severe stomach pain. Serious side effects may include inflamed pancreas and gallbladder problems. Tell your doctor if you experience vision changes. If you're nursing, pregnant, plant-a-by or taking birth control pills and before schedule procedures with anesthesia. Taking Fondeo with an insulin or sulfonyluria may cause low blood sugar. Side effects include diarrhea, nausea and vomiting which can cause dehydration and may cause kidney problems. Once daily Fondeo is available by prescription only in 0.8 milligram, 2.5 milligram, 5.5 milligram, 9 milligram, 14.5 milligram and 17.2 milligram tablets. Learn more at foundeo.lyli.com or call 1-800-lyli-RX. Now is perfect to talk to your doctor about Fondeo.

39:00This episode is supported by Helix. Okay, so summer's officially over, sad and I'm trying to get back into a real routine. And honestly, the first thing I fix is my sleep because everything else falls apart when that's off. It's so true. And what I love about Helix is they have over 20 models so you're not just guessing and hoping for the best. You take a quick quiz, they match you to the right mattress for how you actually sleep. I have the cooling one and it is a game changer. Sleeping hot has become an off-started. If I'm not on the Helix, like we were at hotels, I can only sleep with a sheet on. That's how hot I run. And Chris just the other day was like, are you only sleeping with a sheet on my, yeah, and it's off me half the night. So I have to have the Helix cooling. I agree. And if you spent all summer sleeping on random mattresses like DAX that weren't yours and you're ready to actually feel rested again in your own bed, this is it. Go to helixsleep.com slash armchair for 27% off site wide, which is exclusive for arm cherries right now.

40:01That's helixsleep.com slash armchair for 27% off site wide. Helixsleep.com slash armchair. Maybe it could be either a girl's name or a boy's name. We know that from my list. I think it's a girl. It's a girl. I think it's boy. Oh, hi. I won the bat. There was a bat here, whether you would be a boy or girl. I also won. You said a girl? Yeah, Rob said a boy. Oh, I thought you said a boy. Now I just said it could go either way because I just read a list of girl names that are also boy names and Dexon, let me read the whole list. Bear in mind is also spells the boy way. Okay. That's fair to Rob. Further compounding. Where are you, Jamie? I'm actually in the Dallas, Oregon, which is very next to the river where all your family is from. I know the del's well. We had to go there for home deep old runs anytime.

41:01We needed something in Hood River. Yeah. So I'm actually an esthetician. I just listened to the year guys is waxing story. That's what I do for a living. I was managing a salon and one day one of my employees called me that a man had actually booked a male Brazilian and she did not offer the service. I also did not offer the service, but I had just went to Vegas and learned at like a class on how to perform this service. Rob is like, you know what? It's my time to grow up and be a good boss and I can do this. Tell me what is a male Brazilian. Tell us what the distinction is. It's the traditional like Brazilian wax, except for most, as citizens don't offer it for men. So that's the only difference. I don't even know what a Brazilian is. All hair gone, including your butthole. Yes. Full genitalia, everything, everywhere they're gone. I'm already imagining why it's challenging on a man because they have so much butt hair.

42:03We're going to stop at the butt cheeks. That's going to be a little weird. And then you see hair on the legs like their pants. Yeah. I wouldn't know where to stop if I was applying it around the aina. So I'm like, how far out do I take this? But anyways, that's my confusion. That's for you to think about. Yeah. It also was my confusion. But it's also like, I'm familiar with my anatomy. I've been trained on how to handle female anatomy. I had not been trained to handle male anatomy outside of how I'm already familiar with male anatomy. So I really didn't want to be doing this. Yeah. The guy shows up and I'm tall. I'm 5'8". This guy is like maybe 5'2", 5'3". So I'm immediately like, oh, thank God. This isn't intimidating. Okay. I want to interrupt really quickly. This is normally the one to do this, but I'm going to do it. You're very pretty. Thank you. You are. Yeah. I'll go further. You're hot. Okay. Well, I wanted to, I just was trying, you know, yes, you're hot.

43:04She's trying to be polite. Yeah. I'm trying to say it. But I just think in this context, hot is relevant. Yeah. Okay. Yes. And you're going to be touching a man's penis and pulling on it because part of waxing for people who don't know is like making the skin hot. Thank God. He's a little. Right. It is like a dangerous thing to be doing. I'm immediately like my guard kind of went down because I was like, you know what? The way that he looks and not to be rude, he might not have ever had this penis touched before. Oh, even worse. Yeah. This is worse, not better. I wasn't nervous anymore. Okay. Okay. Great. So we go back there. I start doing my best. I'm trying to run through like everything that I have learned from the class that I had taken on it. Everything is so much different. It's a challenge. I will say I wax women all the time. They sometimes make noises, but not a ton of noises. And if it is, it's like very and obvious like, oh my god, that hurts type of noise.

44:05This guy is either a dead silent or he is groaning. Oh, oh boy. I already knew that it would not be. I'm common for them to have an erection during the service. And I was fully prepared for that. I was not prepared though for him to be like pushing himself into my hand. I feel like he was staring here the entire time. You're mostly. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, Monica's going to handle. He'd be like rolling his eyes in the back of his head. Oh, and I was like, this is just feeling not professional. I finished the service and I'm like, that doesn't feel normal. I call my boss and I'm like, here's everything that happened. It felt very sexual to me. And she's like, no, you're being sexist. You wouldn't be living this way. So I go on and I wax this guy for maybe two, three, four times. And each time that I wax him, the reaction to what I'm doing gets like more and more

45:10severe. So his groans are louder. He has some leakage. Oh, no. Oh, okay. Goodness. Like we can say it pre-come. Yes, I just didn't want to say. I know. I'm going to go ahead and say everything that needs to be said today. Yeah. So I might be tugging her shoulder at some point if I really need something said, but yeah, we'll call that PC. Yeah. Okay. Wow. Every time I wax him, I'm again talking to my boss like, okay, he's being so overly sexual at each appointment. And then one day I'm doing the service and he completely and fully ejaculate. Oh, Jesus. I miss most of it. I dodged it very quickly. Some of it gets on me. Most of it goes all over him. It wasn't quite. It was all very obvious that that's what happened. Mind you. I'm 21. Oh. And I am like, I do not know how to handle this.

46:11So I pretend it doesn't even happen. Oh. I just carry it on. And then again, I go to my boss and I'm like, he literally ejaculated on it. And she's again, like, he needs just man up. Whoa. Is this a woman boss? Yes. This is insane. This is a terrible. This could be a terrible boss story. It could. I mean, she needs to be fired. Does she want to be operating a jack off booth? Like is that what is she want this type of client? Also then she can do it herself. Yeah. I get her. A fun fact. This boss was also my stepmother. Which I think makes this even great. Oh my god. That's like that boss. Bad step mom. Yes. Step mom story. Okay. Wow. I'm sorry. Yes. That's horrible. It gets crazier. Not for me. This next part is actually for my coworker. So I ended up telling her after that. I was like, I'm officially done though. I cannot handle this.

47:13She had also sent to me. Does it arouse you to cause me pain like this? And I was like, I've got you. I knew this whole time. Yeah. What your intentions were here. So fast forward. I don't see him anymore. And he ends up booking with one of my coworkers. And she again reaches out to him to tell him she doesn't offer the service. He doesn't answer. He shows up. He starts demanding that she do the service. She says, Nope, I'm not doing it. I'm going to have to ask you to leave. There was like five or 10 minutes worth of arguing about it. He finally leaves. Ms. coworker took the like evening shift. So it was pretty common. She would be there from 5 p.m. until dark. And she would be alone in the salon. So this day she's closing up. It's like 9.30 at night. She shuts all the lights off. She had to go like up this flight of stairs. And then there's the back door right at the top of the stairs that we would exit out of.

48:15And as soon as she opens the back door, he's right there. He pushes her into the building. No. And he is like, you're going to do my wax now. Thankfully, she is very strong. And she was like, absolutely, I'm not fucking doing this. Get the fuck out of here. And I'm going to call the cops. And that finally was enough to make him leave. I think we never saw or heard from him ever again. But he's just prowling around the dowels. Probably. And Doc, are you familiar with like Bingen? Yeah, yeah. He works for that company in situ. Oh, sure. That makes the drones. Mm-hmm. Yeah, he's all around. Oh, boy. Oh, Jamie. I'm so sorry. Oh, boy. Yeah, this is beyond bad customer. This is criminal customer. Okay, we got bad step mom prompt. We got bad boss prompt. We got sexual assault prompt. Oh, uh-huh. This is wild. And of course, wax. Tell us about a short guy.

49:16We're probably not going to do that prompt. Was that your only dust up doing that stuff? Did you just go like, I'm not doing dudes ever again. No, that's nothing like dust up. Do women ever act inappropriate? No. Yeah. I like that answer. Yeah, that was a dumb question. I officially no longer offer male Brazilians because every single one that I have done has ended up either kind of stalking me or doing something inappropriate at some point. So it's a no for me. Yeah. I hate the stereotype, but if I were you, I'd only do small gay men. I'd have to go like, well, are you small and are you gay? If so, I'll do it. And otherwise, absolutely not. Okay, no, but even still, I feel like just stay away from these men's penises, you know? I mention have to do the, although there's not enough, I imagine when you go to these Vegas conventions for our nest editions, very few are men, I'm guessing.

50:16I'm never a man actually male. Yeah. I've never seen one either. But also because, yeah, because women aren't going to a male institution. Right, right, get only dudes. Yeah, and then not very many dudes want it. And then the dudes want them, women because they're gross. Yeah. Okay, this is tricky. Maybe barbers could start offering it. That's right. Okay. Well, I'm so glad you made it out of here. I'm glad you stuck up for yourself, you tried. Is that woman still your stepmom? No. Yeah. Good. Yeah. Well, it's a delight to meet you. I could have bumped into you in the day. I was back when my mom was in Hood River. I've been waiting and waiting and just never had this. Do you ever eat at Solstice pizza? Yes, all the time. What a place, huh? I want pizza. It is a great place. That might be even the number one thing I miss about my mother. They're having left Hood River. What kind of pizza did they have? Oh, it's like organic, premium ingredients, tons of fun options. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

51:16Very organic, healthy pizza place. What are you giggling about? It's just you can just keep saying organic over it. I do. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. Oh. By the way, I times to be put with you is a question. Who is you outはお前に曾ゆな一流と言なよ? Because it's like a security media company. It's like a security media company. Hey, where's YouTube today? Hey, hey, hey, how are you? I just do the social media stuff. All I do is talk about is your name and your voice. And what's this place? I just do that. What about you? Or something? I worked out in喜歡 ャッickingTV. What? Who's covering your ears? What about you? Who is the person? Oh my gosh. Hello. There we go. Is this Kyle? Let us take in your environment. Your teacher came for the podcast, stand for the therapy.

52:18Oh my god. Listener. Not only is that written behind him on some white background. Dry race. There's also two cute little cherries above. You're so meticulous in borderline OCD. Even the stems go outward. I noticed that. That's very pleasing. Can I take full credit for that one? I may have some other armchairry fans and here who helped out. Oh. Kyle, where are you? I'm actually at Russia Medical University here in Chicago Illinois. I'm in the respiratory care program here. So loving it. We love doctors and nurses. I'm so honored that all these smart people are listening to us. And with that being said, you know, we got to hang on to this medical. Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. Oh wow. This is great. So you're teaching? I'm not teaching. I'm a student. I just started my clinical rotation. So in the final year of it all, how are you holding up? It's a beat down. Sleep is a rare thing to get.

53:19We battle through. And they used to let residents take and fetamines. No, that's one of my understanding is. Yeah. Something like that. Okay. But hey, pleasure meeting you guys. I'm excited to tell you my stories. Let's go back to the year of 2020, the infamous year of 2020. I like to say mine got a little bit more interesting. So this is around October. I was not in school. I was just working as a bartender at this martini and wine bar. Pretty high end place, you know, typical place you bring your first day. What city? Bloomington Normal, central Illinois, right smack in the middle. Okay. Rob, if you ever pass through. Yeah, it's like three and a half hours out the Chicago. Okay. Yeah, small little city. Pretty cool. But anyways, I'm at this restaurant. My manager had just left. So I was kind of like the manager on duty. We had a new bartender and I was like, you know what? Yeah, stick around a couple of closed up. So we've got all our regulars at the bar, you know, this time of night. We got this one guy who's like a professional poker player online.

54:20So he's always at the bar with his martini sipping on that plan. And he's got a good buddy who we call big John. He's like six, seven, two, 80. He's like bouncer at all the different bars around town. So everybody knows them. So we're all just hanging out and then this guy walks in and immediately you're just like, okay, doesn't seem like the type that would come in here, but whatever. Sure. So he walks up to the bar and sub ordering his drink. And I see him bickering with the bartender over the price. I think it was because, you know, he ordered it on the rocks and typically we pour extra of it to rocks and it comes with a little surcharge. Nothing crazy. I think the total cost of the drink was like $12. Well, he starts arguing about it. So the poker player is sitting right there and he's like, hey, man, I'll buy your drink. Just get away. I got my computer here. So what does the guy do? He takes his drink and he slams it on the computer. Computer just shatters. The poker player just throws his hands up like, do what the heck just happened?

55:23And then big John takes this guy up and it's carrying him out and I'm just like, come on. The manager just laughed and I got to deal with this. And I'm like, John, you don't work here. Can't really be touching other customers. So I run outside their arguing and yelling at each other. John, I tell him to go inside. He goes inside and this guy just won't stop screaming. And I'm like, dude, calm down. And he's like, dude, I got paid for. I'm like, I'll cop in your thing. Just believe. And he's got his candy on his back. He's ready to suck her punch somebody. And at this point, everybody's outside with their phones, recording. It's like, you know, what's going on? And all of a sudden, it comes to the side and I'm like, what the hell is he holding? Is that an ax? What? And I'm just like, whoa, he had a hatchet tucked in his waistband. Sure enough, I found out later as a hatchet. But he had a hatchet. So immediately panic settles in. First of all, there's all over like a $12 drink.

56:23So I turn around. I'm like, everybody get inside, get inside so I close and lock this door. So when I had my back turned, all of a sudden, I just feel something hit me right in the back. And my first instinct's like, tell me he did not just hit me with that thing. Because at first, you know, the adrenaline, it didn't hurt. Like, it just felt like he punched me. I reach back, feeling around and all of a sudden, I feel somewhat, I turn up, can feel like maybe a little shoulder bone. Oh, my hand just completely red. Oh my God, this is a fucking psycho. Yeah. You got to be so deranged to hit someone with an ax. That's a step beyond shooting someone's hatchet. So I immediately just fall to ground. Big John is like freaking out because he thinks it's his fault and I'm like, it kind of is dude, but anyway, I'm psyched boy, put some pressure on my back dude. Does the guy run? Oh, he was gone. Like in a split second, I'll get to that. So everybody's drunk. Remind you that. I'm like the sober one there because I'm the only one who's working out the time. So everybody's drunk. I've got a girl screaming, just breathe, just stay with me.

57:26I'm like, get away and call 911. Yeah. I think what are we doing? So he's like, what can I get for you? What can I get for you? I'm like, can give me a pillow, like give me something from my head. Sure enough, ambulance picks me up. We get to the hospital in like record time and I have like an aisle of people, you know, ready to take care of me. The police officer walks in, try to get some information real quick. I'm expected to answer and you'll fall out of statement but he goes, hey, we got him. I'm like, you got him. I was like, how did you get him so fast? So apparently somebody had gotten stabbed five minutes before I did. So they had police out looking for somebody already and they found this guy running across. I'm like, let's go talk to him. Oh my God. He was on a spree. Yeah, it was that one with also a hatchet. So I'm not sure he didn't have a ditch in the hatchet but he still had the holster attached to his belt. So that's how they knew it was him. But it gets a little lighter. So the doctor there as easy as you know, looking at the wound, they had to clean it like three times to not feel good.

58:28That will wake you up. But where he hit me was kind of funny because I have a couple tattoos on my back and one of which is a mom tattoo and he nailed me right on the mom tattoo. So my surgeon's stitching me up. He's like, this is kind of easy. I can line it up. He goes, Hey, looks like mom had your back that night. Six inches to the right. Could have hit me in the back of the head or the spine, half inch deeper. Could have hit an artery. So I got super, super lucky. Oh, and I'm assuming he hit you with the blade side and not the blunt hammer side of it. Yeah. I sense a picture of Rob. It's a tactical hatchet. Oh, that's a terrifying hatchet. And okay, now I'm looking at the open wound. This is not what I heard hatchet. I imagine like wood and like old timey. Yeah, like lumberjack ass. Exactly. But this is like a straight up weapon. It's just a crazy weapon. Yeah, looks like something you would see in a kung fu movie or something a warlock would

59:32carry or one of these crazy militia people. But look at the size of this fucking thing. Oh, fuck. Let's see. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Yeah, let's get it done. It tends to. Oh, it is a deep. And for the listener, it's the full width of your scapula, like your whole shoulder blade. That's about the same size, right? Oh, yeah. Very, very lucky. Mom definitely had my back. Yeah. Well, Kyle, though I can relate to you because I got hit in the back with a crowbar by a cab driver. And same. It doesn't hurt at all when it happens. You're just like, you register that something is hit your back. And you continue running if you're in my, you were in my situation. Yeah. And then back at the house, you're like, oh my God, there's a fucking huge egg on my, but yeah, I felt like I got hit by a train after adrenaline was off and morphine. And it was rough. Did you follow the prosecution of this gentleman? I shouldn't say gentlemen, this motherfucker. He ended up only getting five years.

1:00:32I came to peace with that. It was like, he didn't kill me. He had a lot of mental issues going on. So he did his time, but get this as soon as he gets out, I was like, you know, for Crapson giggles, I ended up looking him up. He ended up molesting a minor. It was like 14 or younger. So now he's at a halfway house in Chicago. And it's just like, are you kidding me? He's not back in jail for that. I did. It's such a problem. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, well, we have these strays in our society. Yeah. For it being like the worst thing that could have ever happened in my life, it honestly ended up turning out to be one of the best things in the sense. I mean, I ended up deciding to go to school full time when it was over because I had nothing else but to think about my life and my life choices, got into the medical field. Here I am with a white coat. No, I ended up just getting on this reality game show called The Shift. I know Monica, you're a fan of the pit. Look. The show called The Shift. It's the same concept. It's like 12 hours and every hour is a different competition.

1:01:34So my season comes out October 20th. So definitely check it out on YouTube. I will definitely be watching that. The shift. This is exciting. You'd be like, that's the hatching guy. Yeah. Last follow up question. Your manager had already left, which put you in charge in your 20s. And then you get hatcheted and they take you away. So I'm assuming the bartender was left behind or on the show. Who was at the restaurant? I'm a video. You just see him. He just puts his hands like this and he's just shaking his head. The entire time it's happening. He's got his hands on his head. I had to talk to him. He quit like a couple weeks after. It's like that was too much, man. It was too much. I never thought it would happen somewhere like that. I'm like, yeah, I guess not for everyone. Wow. That is really wild. It worked out. Exactly. Yeah, I got great supporters. If you don't mind, I've got two would love to say. Yeah, bring them in. Hi. Hi. Hi, I'm his girlfriend. He told me this hatchet story on our first day.

1:02:37Like it was going to be an impressive story to like attract me. Well, it's just work. Clearly. We're going to kind of work that we've been together. It's been four years. I didn't know him back then. Oh, I love it. Wow. And how about our second friend here? What's your name? My name's Bridget. I'm a sister, something he failed to mention was my name is also tattooed on his back. Oh, my goodness. But I did not have his back that night. Wow. I'm a real family man. Yeah, I like this little triumphant here. Well, it's lovely meeting you guys. Yeah, thanks for chatting. Thank you, Songlatch. It was great to meet you guys. Yeah, all right. Take care. Bye. Bye. Whoo. Hatchet to the back. That's tough. That's a shitty customer if they drive a hatchet in your back. Have you ever read the book Hatchet? No. I think it's a book from like when you're a kid and it's a boy and I like, I know the cover and I also read it. Let's see. Yeah, this. Does this ring a bell? No, but it's a pretty cover. It's been got the old timey hatchet you were thinking of, not the assault hatchet.

1:03:41That's why it's plain crashes and then he has to live, you know? And he's just got his trusty hatchet. Yeah, that's right. It's not that painful. They let him bring a hatchet on the airplane. Yeah. I don't think you can do that anymore. All right. Well, that was wild. Yeah, that was wild. Twisty and turvy. Love you. Love you. Do you want to sing a tune or something? I'm going to play a song. Okay, great. We don't have a thing song for this new show. So here I go, go, go. We're going to ask some random questions and with the help of all Jerry's bookets and suggestions. I'm a fire rindish. I'm a fire rindish. Enjoy. We are supported by all state. Checking all state first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking your gas gauge before hitting the road. You genuinely thought you could make it? You were wrong. That's a very long stretch of highway where you learned exactly how far fumes can take

1:04:44you. And it's enough enough. Yeah, checking first is an excellent plan. So check all state first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds and for fast reliable help when you need it, add an all state roadside plan today. You're in good hands with all state potential savings. Very insurance and roadside assistance plans are subject to terms conditions and availability insurance provided by all state North American insurance company Northbrook Illinois roadside assistance plans provided by all state motor club incorporated in all state affiliate.